Talk to the Snail: Ten Commandments for Understanding the French

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More About This Book

Overview

Have you ever walked into a half-empty Parisian restaurant, only to be told that it's "complet"? Attempted to say "merci beaucoup" and accidentally complimented someone's physique? Been overlooked at the boulangerie due to your adherence to the bizarre foreign custom of waiting in line? Well, you're not alone. The internationally bestselling author of A Year in the Merde and In the Merde for Love has been there too, and he is here to help. In Talk to the Snail, Stephen Clarke distills the fruits of years spent in the French trenches into a truly handy (and hilarious) book of advice. Read this book, and find out how to get good service from the grumpiest waiter; be exquisitely polite and brutally rude at the same time; and employ the language of l'amour and le sexe. Everything you need is here in this funny, informative, and seriously useful guide to getting what you really want from the French.

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
In Clarke's newest nonfiction on the French and francophiles (after A Year in the Merde), he offers actually 11 witty commandments for understanding the French. He tackles the stereotypical experiences tourists encounter, explaining why French waiters always ignore you, why everyone's always on strike or why Frenchmen are never wrong about anything. He explains the customs: how to decide when to kiss versus when to handshake, how to romance a French woman or how to be cuttingly rude while seeming polite, and how mispronouncing certain words (the noun "un baiser" means "to kiss"; the verb, "to screw") can get you in trouble (other expressions, like "je t'aime," can't be said often enough). Within Clarke's humorous anecdotes lie grains of seriousness. Why, for example, do the French constantly correct everyone's attempts to speak their language if they also want it to be accepted as a global language? And is it not significant that the French term for bedding someone, "conclure," translates as "to conclude"? In the end, this is an entertaining bon voyage present for anyone heading to France. (Jan.) Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.
Library Journal

With a multitude of books about French culture on the market, is there a need for another? Clarke (A Year in the Merde, In the Merde for Love) evidently thinks so, and indeed he manages to add something new to the genre. The book presents a list of ten commandments (actually 11) for dealing with the French, illustrated by witty anecdotes and snarky opinions that betray the British author's love-hate relationship with his country of residence (Clarke lives in Paris). This book has something for everyone: tips on dining etiquette for the casual traveler, business negotiation advice, and help for the home buyer. A potentially handy list of phrases accompanies each chapter, although readers should be wary of the pronunciation guides, which seem primarily designed to make fun of the French language or of foreign attempts to speak it. Using these guides could result in the very misunderstandings Clarke describes in the rest of the book. For large public libraries where books about French culture circulate well.
—Heidi Senior

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781596913097
  • Publisher: Bloomsbury USA
  • Publication date: 12/26/2006
  • Pages: 272
  • Sales rank: 321,236
  • Product dimensions: 5.25 (w) x 8.15 (h) x 0.97 (d)

Meet the Author

Stephen Clarke is a British journalist and the internationally bestselling author of A Year in the Merde and In the Merde for Love, which describe the misadventures of Paul West in France. He himself has lived in France for twelve years.

Customer Reviews

Average Rating 3.5
( 7 )

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Sort by: Showing all of 7 Customer Reviews

  • Posted January 23, 2010

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    Truth in Humor

    Stephen Clarke can be very funny, yet this book strikes me as having something more than humor. The French, especially Parisians, can easily mystify the foreigner, and this book is a good example of being forearmed by being forewarned. Things that have baffled me about the French psyche are presented in a delightful way, yet the subtext is not humor at all: it's a fine attempt to help one move gracefully among the people of France. I recommend this book as a gift for anyone traveling to France- even if it's you yourself. I only wish I'd had the book a decade ago.

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  • Posted June 6, 2009

    more from this reviewer

    Can anyone truly understand the French?

    I love France and have some wonderful friends there. That being said I have to comment that some things the French do or think defy non-French logic and begs for a little satire. This book provides that with tongue in cheek good humor. If you have been to France you might find this good for a laugh. If you are going there consider it as a good-natured book of suggestions on how to cope.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 18, 2007

    Vive la France!!

    As an American student living in the south-of-France/Monaco, I wanted to know just exactly why the French act they way do without ever questioning them personally. Mr. Clarke does an excellent job with this book by giving VERY REAL examples of how the French act, think, and conduct themselves, all while giving humorous personal experiences. This book is a MUST for anyone who will be visiting France!

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