A Teen's Guide to Success: How to Be Calm, Confident, Focused


The world’s teenagers have never been so challenged as they are today. The constant demands of parents, school, work, peers, social media, athletics, music. . .  has created a generation who, while tremendously capable, are also tremendously stressed. Today’s teens are expected to not only do it all but to do it now.

Having personally coached thousands of students over his years as an educator and a professional performance coach, Dr. Bernstein (Dr. B) understands and ...

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A Teen's Guide to Success: How to Be Calm, Confident & Focused

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The world’s teenagers have never been so challenged as they are today. The constant demands of parents, school, work, peers, social media, athletics, music. . .  has created a generation who, while tremendously capable, are also tremendously stressed. Today’s teens are expected to not only do it all but to do it now.

Having personally coached thousands of students over his years as an educator and a professional performance coach, Dr. Bernstein (Dr. B) understands and connects with today’s young adults. He knows they are intelligent, talented and full of creative energy and he uses his decades of experience in A Teen’s Guide to Success to help teen’s succeed.

A Teen’s Guide to Success shares principles and skills that help teens discover their higher potential and learn how to be calm, confident and focused in whatever situation they find themselves. Teens will learn the same techniques that all top athletes, musicians, business leaders and other successful people practice. As teens implement the tools taught in A Teen's Guide to Success they will find a roadmap to achieve their potential and be successful in all aspects of their lives.

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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

"This is an awesome book on helping you be your best. Get it, read it, apply it . . . your life will improve. And that shall bring you the admiration of your dear sweet grandmother. Read it for her. She's counting on you. No pressure."
—Josh Shipp, teen expert, host of the show JUMP SHIPP, and author of The Teen's Guide to World Domination
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781938301186
  • Publisher: Familius
  • Publication date: 5/25/2013
  • Pages: 228
  • Sales rank: 929,184
  • Product dimensions: 5.90 (w) x 8.90 (h) x 0.70 (d)

Meet the Author

Ben Bernstein, Ph.D., author of Test Success, is an award-winning educator and clinical psychologist. He has taught at every level of the educational system. He coaches individuals in high stress/high performance jobs including professional athletes, actors, opera singers, attorneys, medical professionals, and many others to achieve improved results. He resides in Oakland, California.

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Table of Contents

Chapter 1     Becoming Yourself
Your teenage years don’t have to be chaotic or miserable. They are the threshold to the rest of your life. They’re the best time to get yourself ready to be fulfilled and successful by learning to be calm, confident and focused.  Redefining success as being fulfilled by being your highest self.
Chapter 2     Where Are You?
Self-diagnosing: how calm, confident and focused are you?  Thinking about yourself in different contexts:  at home, at school, in other situations.  What are your habits of relating to yourself and others. Defining “productive” and “unproductive” habits. Making the case for being calm, confident and focused.
Chapter 3     Stress and How to Deal with It
The relationship between stress and “performance” (living successfully).   Stress in the body, mind and spirit.  The three-legged stool:  a strong platform by developing productive habits. Your responsibility in this process (not your parent’s or your teacher’s).  If you want to be treated more like a young adult you have to act like one.
Chapters 4-6  provide the 3 legged stool model: how to be calm, confident and focused.
Chapter 4     Being Calm
Uses specific vignettes to illustrate what not being calm and being calm feel and look like. Cultivating your awareness of your body (how do you know when you’re not calm? where do you feel tense?). Using the awareness as the signal to use the tools. The three tools for calming down: Breathing; Grounding; Sensing.
Chapter 5     Remaining Confident
Vignettes illustrate what being confident looks and feels like: thinking positive (and accurate!) thoughts about yourself.  Cultivating awareness of your negative thinking (“I can’t handle this”) and using you awareness as the signal to use the three tools for remaining confident:  Confide; Reflect; Envision.
Chapter 6     Staying Focused
What does staying focused look and feel like? (vignettes). What does “focused” mean? (Having a goal and taking actions that get you to it). What are your goals? Are they really your goals. How do you become distracted?  Cultivating your awareness of when a goal isn’t important to you, and when you become distracted. Using the three tools for staying focused:  Stop; Listen; Fulfill.
Chapter 7-10 offer situational vignettes and what-would-you-do? examples. Each of these chapters will start off with exercises for the reader to state his/her goals in the particular context.
Chapter 7     Successful in School
Focuses on the academic aspect of school. The tools to succeed in class, doing homework and on tests. Vignettes and brief examples to show productive and unproductive habits.  Covering such topics as tests, test anxiety, time management, procrastination, classroom participation, dealing with teachers, competition and comparing yourself with others.
Chapter 8     Happy at Home
Using the tools at home. Covering such topics as dealing with your parents, siblings, other significant others in your family.  Committing yourself to being happy by being calm, confident and focused.  What to do when things go wrong (abuse in the home) Vignettes to illustrate productive and non-productive habits at home.
Chapter 9     Comfortable Socially
Vignettes to show the use of the tools in social situations: with your friends (one-on-one friendships;  groups), in new situations (moving to a new place, starting in a new school).  Social issues: social media; cliques; bullying. 
Chapter 10   Other times and places
After school activities (athletics, music/theater performance, hobbies, volunteer work).
Part-time jobs. Current events.  Covering topics such as: practicing, competition, dealing with coaches and teachers; how current events effect you.  Vignettes.
Chapter 11   Give Your Parents This Chapter
Directed to parents: you have to learn to be calm, confident and focused yourself. Your teen’s goals may be different than yours. Life doesn’t have to be a fight or burdensome struggle between you and your team. How to use the tools so that you and your teen can collaborate to reach his or her goals.
Chapter 12   On Your Path
Covering such issues as: getting into college; physical and mental health; sex; drugs.
Finding meaning and the role of spirit in life: developing a connection to something greater.The biggest challenge of life is to continue to grow. To be and become yourself.  To take your place in the community and to make your contribution. 
Web-based resources for teens and their parents

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