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Publishers WeeklyThough we know that bad things happen to good people, we often don't realize how little good typical coping mechanisms-drinking, eating, smoking or sleeping-do to help our problems. Speaker and author Kingma (Coming Apart) calls these "default" or "compensating" behaviors, which people turn to out of habit. Kingma's alternative involves confronting those behaviors and learning to understand our personal "Life Themes," the "psychological riddle" each person struggles to solve in this life, in order to heal from trauma. A warm, empathetic and practical guide, Kingma delineates ten steps, from "Cry Your Heart Out" and "Do Something Different" to "Go Where the Love Is" and "Live in the Light of the Spirit," that ease readers into the hard work of taking action following a loss. Kingma makes a convincing case for the notion that every setback provides an opportunity, and that overcoming any crisis will require leaving our comfort zone and reassessing our attitudes and emotional responses: "when circumstances bring us to our knees, we're finally willing to tiptoe into the exploration of who we really are and what our lives might really be about."
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