The Break-Up Artist [NOOK Book]

Overview


Some sixteen-year-olds babysit for extra cash.

Some work at the mall.

Becca Williamson breaks up couples.

Becca knows from experience the damage that love can do. After all, it was so-called love that turned Huxley from her childhood best friend into a social-world dictator, and love that left Becca's older sister devastated at the altar. Instead of sitting on the sidelines, Becca strikes back—for just one ...

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The Break-Up Artist

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Overview


Some sixteen-year-olds babysit for extra cash.

Some work at the mall.

Becca Williamson breaks up couples.

Becca knows from experience the damage that love can do. After all, it was so-called love that turned Huxley from her childhood best friend into a social-world dictator, and love that left Becca's older sister devastated at the altar. Instead of sitting on the sidelines, Becca strikes back—for just one hundred dollars via PayPal, she will trick and manipulate any couple's relationship into smithereens. And with relationship zombies overrunning her school and treating single girls as if they're second-class citizens, business is unfortunately booming. Even Becca's best friend, Val, has resorted to outright lies to snag a boyfriend.

One night, Becca receives a mysterious offer to break up the most popular couple in school: Huxley and the football team's star player, Steve. To succeed, she'll have to plan her most elaborate scheme to date—starting rumors, sabotaging cell phones, breaking into cars…not to mention sneaking back into Huxley's good graces. All while fending off the inappropriate feelings she may or may not be having for Val's new boyfriend.

No one said being the Break-Up Artist would be easy.

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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
02/24/2014
To most of Becca Williamson’s classmates, she’s just another not-especially-popular member of the Ashland High student body. But to those who reach out to her secret alter ego, she’s a ticket to romantic ruin: as the Break-Up Artist, Becca engineers couples’ downfalls for 100 bucks a pop. Siegel’s debut follows Becca into the ethical morass that has become her life, as she manipulates classmates’ relationships with fake notes to ex-girlfriends, surreptitious text messages, and more. It’s not that Becca’s against love, exactly—she just doesn’t believe these people are truly in love to begin with, and she resents a larger culture in which singles are treated like lepers and girls abandon their best friends for boys. This would all be well and good if it weren’t for Becca’s near-total moral blindness and lack of self-awareness or empathy, especially after she starts hooking up with her best friend’s boyfriend amid her other machinations. Becca learns some hard lessons, but maybe not hard enough. Even as the book ends, she is justifying herself. “I didn’t destroy young love,” she thinks. “I just sped up the inevitable.” Ages 14–up. (May)
From the Publisher
"Original, funny, brilliant ... Not a cliché in it. I adored this book." -Huntley Fitzpatrick, author of My Life Next Door

"An exceptionally clever, entertaining, and fast-paced debut." -Hannah Harrington, author of Speechless and Saving June

"The Break-Up Artist reads like your new favorite rom-com. I couldn't stop laughing at Becca's Machiavellian hijinks and snarky one-liners!" – Lauren Morrill, author of Meant to Be

Voya Reviews, April 2014 (Vol. 36, No. 1) - Deena Viviani
In middle school, Becca’s best friend, Huxley, ditched her for a guy. In high school, Becca’s sister was stood up at the altar. Both of those events pushed Becca into becoming the Break-Up Artist. For an electronic payment, her customers can request that she end a couple’s relationship and Becca will anonymously create drama, scandals, and rumors to accomplish just that. She figures, why not? Based on what she has seen, she is only speeding up the inevitable. Then, Becca finds herself falling for her best friend’s boyfriend and for the first time, she wonders if Huxley is right—that true love does exist. If so, Becca will have to own up to being the Break-Up Artist and repair the damage she has caused no matter what the consequences. Becca’s schemes are entertaining and her boy-crazy best friend is amusing, but Becca herself is hard to like. Her business is mean but she never admits it, not even at the end when she tries to undo the damage the Break-Up Artist caused Huxley and her boyfriend. There are many clichés in this book, like the importance of having the “right” boyfriend, the popular mean girls, and the snobby cheerleaders, but none are so over-the-top that this novel has the humor or feel of a satire. If your library needs more stories of jilted high school romances, wait for the paperback of this novel. Reviewer: Deena Viviani; Ages 12 to 18.
Voya Reviews, April 2014 (Vol. 36, No. 1) - Maia Raynor
In Becca’s eyes, love can only cause destruction. After all, it was love that ruined her sister’s marriage, and love that turned her childhood best friend into a social dictator. Becca feels she needs to expose love for the sham that it is. For only one hundred dollars via PayPal, Becca carries out secret missions to sabotage relationships. Siegel’s clever debut is full of humor, drama, and surprises. This fun, fast-paced novel will appeal to fans of realistic fiction and romance. Reviewer: Maia Raynor, Teen Reviewer; Ages 12 to 18.
Kirkus Reviews
2014-03-17
Breakin' up may be hard to do but not if you get a little help from a cynical teenager who's found a niche market for her special skills. Becca Williamson has spent her high school career going largely unnoticed. All around her, she's seen what love does to people: how her sister was jilted at the altar, how her parents act more like siblings than lovers, and how she lost her old best friend, Huxley, years back when Huxley started dating a popular football player named Steve. Aided by a keen eye and a razor-sharp wit, Becca uses her skills to break up her classmates for profit. One day she receives a mysterious request that asks her to split power-couple Steve and Huxley. Still nursing her old wounds, she accepts. Becca suddenly finds herself immersed in the popular crowd for the first time and wondering if she can really do it—can she ruin her ex-BFF's life? A fun, lighthearted romp with all the makings of a good rom-com, this romantic darling has it all: laughs, intrigue and a healthy dash of love conquering all. Most readers will undoubtedly clamor for more of Becca's adventures, and Siegel indicates she may be back, in a closing Q-and-A. A true chick-lit charmer, ideal for a chilly winter night or a sunny beach chair. (Chick-lit/romance. 12-16)
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781460326633
  • Publisher: Harlequin
  • Publication date: 5/1/2014
  • Series: Break-Up Artist Series , #1
  • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
  • Format: eBook
  • Edition description: Original
  • Pages: 304
  • Sales rank: 114,852
  • Age range: 14 - 17 Years
  • File size: 400 KB

Meet the Author


Philip Siegel grew up in New Jersey, which he insists is much nicer than certain TV shows would have you believe. He graduated from Northwestern University and promptly moved out to L.A., where he became an NBC Page. He likes to think that the character of Kenneth on 30 Rock is loosely based on his life rights. Currently, he lives in Chicago and does his best writing sandwiched in between colorful characters on the El. Visit him online: philipsiegel.com or @FillupSeagull.

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Read an Excerpt

Calista McTiernan looks away from the screen. Tears form in her eyes. The levee's about to break. I wish I could reach through my computer monitor and give her a hug. I hear these stories too often.

"Ever since they started dating, Bari's become a totally different person. Derek's favorite band is U2, and now magically it's hers, too. Derek is into politics, and now Bari is watching CNN religiously. I laughed it off because she acted this way with her last boyfriend. But then…" Calista shakes her head.

"But then what?" I ask in my best British accent, looking directly into my webcam.

"Then she dyed her hair brown, she started dressing like some J. Crew mannequin, and this week she quit cheerleading." Her blond locks fan around her pea-sized head. Her hair's the same shade as mine, but hers is real.

"People change. It happens."

"Yeah, but this isn't the same. Derek's making her do this. He told her he thinks blondes are trashy, and he didn't want some slutty cheerleader girlfriend visiting him at Princeton next year. He said that. To her face!"

"He did?" Derek Kelley has been student council president for three years, and what little power the Student Government Association-aka the SGA-holds has gone to his head. He seems friendly in the halls, but guys are just as capable of being fake nice as girls.

"Bari said he was joking around, but I'm not laughing."

"Have you tried talking to her about it?" I can already guess the answer.

"She says she isn't into cheerleading anymore and she's never felt like a blonde." Calista rubs her forehead, and I can feel her concern through the screen. "Everything that made her Bari is disappearing."

I lean closer in my chair, all business, and hold Calista's attention. "So, you want me to do this?"

Calista squeezes a fresh set of tears from her eyes. I instinctively reach for the Kleenex box on my desk, forgetting we're on Skype. "My best friend is pushing me away. You don't know what that's like."

I do, I want to tell her. My eyes wander to the floor and the pair of golden ballet slippers next to my desk. It's like a hole through your heart that can never be filled. A part of you that is missing forever. I should throw the slippers out like I've done with the rest of my memories from that train wreck of a friendship, but I won't. I never do. I keep them here, in plain sight, a perpetual reminder of why I do this.

I force my attention back to the screen. I can never get personal. One misspoken word, one accidental truth, and I give myself away.

"I told her I didn't think Derek was treating her well," Calista says.

"And what did she say?"

Calista stares at the screen, her bottom lip quivering. Only the hissing of her radiator fills my speaker.

"She said, 'You just don't understand because you're single.'" Tears stream down Calista's cheeks. She buries her face in her knee to compose herself.

I clench my lips together. I have to remind myself to stay strong for my client. She can fall apart, but I have to make things right. Blood rushes to my face in frustration, coloring me the same shade as this shapeless graduation robe I'm wearing.

Calista continues, "I feel like if Derek had his way, she'd never talk to any of her friends again. Especially me."

My raccoon mask conceals my raised eyebrows. I've seen Bari and Calista joined at the hip since elementary school. They once tried convincing our classmates that they were cousins. (I fell for it.) They seemed to have one of those uber-tight friendship bonds that I thought would survive the dating world. Then again, I'd thought I had that, too. But now I know that once people get into relationships, friends-and rational thought-get tossed aside.

"It's a good thing you came to me," I say.

"You seriously can break them up?"

"I have a perfect track record."

"How?"

"My methods are proprietary and confidential."

"What does that mean?"

"It means I'm really, really good, and you'll just have to trust me." I catch my reflection in the screen. I'm shocked anyone's been able to take me seriously in this disguise. I look like an escaped mental patient, but that's better than looking like myself. Luckily, my work speaks for itself.

"It's not going to be easy. I think they've already said 'I love you' to each other."

"I'll take my chances," I say. Why do my classmates believe that saying those three words automatically protects a couple? They're not relationship insurance. They're just words, and if people actually meant them, then I would be out of a job. Bari and Derek are a couple destined for flame out. I'm just speeding up the inevitable. And if I can save Bari before she's permanently under Derek's thumb, so much the better.

"Before we go forward, I want you to be certain about this."

She gets so quiet I can hear the static crackling in the background. "I-I don't know."

"A minute ago you were devastated."

"I know. But…" Calista hugs her chopstick legs into her chest. I wonder if she's one of those girls who stays skinny no matter how much she eats. "This seems kind of severe. I don't know, and maybe a little petty, too?"

I clench my jaw. "When was the last time she called or texted you just to say hi?"

Calista ponders this. She shrugs her shoulder.

"So you think it's fair that she's cutting you out of her life? Just because she has a boyfriend?" I ask calmly.

"No. But Derek-"

"Derek hasn't mastered the art of mind control. She's choosing all of this. To disappear. To change. To stop being friends with you. It'd be nice if Bari suddenly came to her senses, but that's not going to happen, and you know it," I say. Blunt, but not untrue. "So now here's where you choose-are you going to let her continue on this path uninterrupted or are you going to do something about it?"

"So you really will break them up?" she asks between sniffles.

"For a hundred dollars via PayPal I can." The wheels begin turning in my head. I flash Calista a warm smile, telling her I got this. Maybe I can salvage this friendship. No girl should have to live through a best friend cutting her out of her life.

Her face brightens among the red splotches, and she smiles for the first time tonight. "Let's do it."

My mom still makes me a peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich every morning. It was the only thing I ate for breakfast when I was in elementary school, and she stuck with it. Now that I'm older, I found my ideal get-up-and-get-'em meal: a large cup of coffee. Black, no sugar.

Sharp rays of morning sun pierce through the kitchen windows. My dad sits at the table with his coffee and oatmeal, watching a guy shout on TV. Apparently, the fluctuation of Chinese currency can make some people quite flustered. My mom hands me a cup of coffee, and I push aside the sandwich with my mug. She picks it up and takes a bite. And so goes our morning routine.

"Busy day today?" my mom asks.

"Kinda." I have a new couple to break up. Oh, and I have a math quiz. "Where's Diane?"

My mom heaves a sigh, then gives me a look like I should know better. "Still sleeping."

Which I should've known, but I hold out hope that one day the answer will be better. My dad shakes his head and mutters to himself.

"Hey," my mom says to my dad after taking another bite of my former breakfast. "Why did you get one-ply toilet paper last night?"

"It was on sale," he says, his focus returning to Chinese currency.

"You couldn't spring for two-ply?"

"Not if it's not on sale."

"We don't live in a tenement."

"More like a Turkish prison," he says with a half smile.

She rolls her eyes and takes a bite of the sandwich. My dad eats a few more spoonfuls of oatmeal then gets up. He puts on his suit jacket, then his winter coat. He kisses me goodbye, and gives my mom a pat on the shoulder while she wipes down the counter. It's like this every day, every year, the same motions. Way to keep the romance alive, guys. If it was ever even there to begin with.

My dad pauses at the door, and for a second I wonder if he's going to pick my mom up in a hug and plant one on her, like lovey-dovey parents in a cheesy sitcom.

"I'll be on the 5:57 train tonight. I'll just pick up a roastbeef sandwich at the station for dinner," he says.

"Okay," my mom says, washing out his oatmeal bowl in the sink.

Yep. So much for love.

Before I break up a couple, I have to do my research and examine their dating history. I have to know their past if I want to understand their present. Having a significant other will put any student at Ashland High School on the social radar, and chances are if you're in a relationship, someone else is talking about it.

In history class, I use the middle section of my three-subject notebook to build a dating dossier on Bari and Derek, tucked in between U.S. history and trig. I don't like to build dossiers when one of my targets is two rows over from me, but she's so engrossed in texting someone (let's be real: Derek), she won't even notice. Nothing our teacher Mr. Harrison says elicits a reaction from her. Bari clutches her phone against her stomach, as if waiting for the next message to inject her with another ounce of life.

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 3.5
( 7 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 7 Customer Reviews
  • Posted May 15, 2014

    more from this reviewer

    I needed something lighthearted and fun. That's exactly what I g

    I needed something lighthearted and fun. That's exactly what I got with The Break-Up Artist. This book was incredibly easy and fun to read. I could have easily devoured the book in one sitting if I hadn't been so sleepy light night.

    Even though the story flows pretty predictably, don't let that stop you from picking it up. It's still worth it! Trust me on this one. It can definitely stand apart from its YA counterparts. The Break-Up Artist is well written and funny. The humor in this book is what I enjoyed the most. While I don't know if Philip Siegel has any more books for Becca planned, I am definitely looking forward to reading more by him in the future.

    You can read all of my reviews on my blog, KDH Reviews.

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  • Posted May 7, 2014

    Admit it. There has always been that one relationship (or two) t

    Admit it. There has always been that one relationship (or two) that you were dying to break-up. Whether it was because your best friend turned into someone different, or the couple was in so deep they couldn’t see how wrong they were for each other, or perhaps just because you were jealous—you’ve wished that someone would come along and break them up. Meet Becca. She’s your person.

    I have to admit that I nearly didn’t pick up this novel. Readers just know going in that Becca is going to get caught, that the people in her school are going to make an example of her, and that it’s just not going to end well for her. And because that sounds very much like a bunch of teen movies I’ve seen, I nearly stopped myself before I even began reading. And I’m so glad that I didn’t listen to my inner monologue. The Break-Up Artist is actually a hilarious tale and, though we know how it’s going to end from the very beginning, Siegel makes this novel stand apart from all the teen angst movies and books out there, and I highly enjoyed nearly every minute of it.

    Becca has seen how relationships can ruin a person, so she’s made it her job to break up relationships before they get to the stage where they ruin lives. Amazingly enough, well, perhaps not knowing human nature, there are tons of clients willing to pay the masked break-up artist if she can successfully break up the couple in question. And in the beginning, it seems harmless enough. She really is doing some people a favor by breaking them up, as seen by how self-absorbed and forgetful they become around their significant other. It’s true, people change around their beau, especially teens in relationships, and so it makes sense that Becca has found a calling in “helping” her peers return to their right sense of mind.

    When Becca is asked to break up Huxley and Steve, she takes on the challenge, and hilarity ensues along the way, but so do some very real life lessons, like fate, friendship, and right from wrong. Becca has a lot to learn in the love department, and at one point even she is duped into the “relationship” throng, going against everything she’s ever preached, and learning that perhaps what she’s doing isn’t right at all. Constantly battling against herself and her desire for friendship, especially as she see’s her true friend, Huxley, return to her, Becca has a lot of growing up to do, and this is the perfect tale to tell it all. Though I didn’t agree with her when it came to her best-friend’s boyfriend—in fact I found her to be quite silly in her antics here—I get what she’s going through, and I just adored how the entire story unfolded. And there’s going to be a sequel of sorts—I can’t wait to see what’s next in store for Becca!

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  • Posted May 1, 2014

    more from this reviewer

    The Break-Up Artist came on my radar when I saw it for review

    The Break-Up Artist came on my radar when I saw it for review on Netgalley. I liked the premise, and even though I knew that the main character, Becca would probably undergo a crazy transformation on her views of dating and love.
    Sure enough, at first, Becca was very jaded. She scoffed at PDA, and she felt a solidarity with her other single friend Val. She'd lost her best friend from earlier in life when she dated a new guy quarterback and her popularity skyrocketed, and on top of that Becca's sister was left right before her wedding. So, she has seen the pain and the devastation that being in a relationship can bring, so she offers her services to break up couples, thinking she is saving them from pain later on. She gets pretty divisive in her goals to break up others, and gets a challenge she isn't sure that she can do.
    I guess some of my problems were that the characters seemed really immature at times and that there was maybe too much drama for me at times. I know that some of this is just the nature of the book and subject. It's about a girl who breaks up couples, so I should have predicted there would be fall out and then also the actions of Becca catching up to her. And they did, but I think that she first went downhill in her actions rather than a steady character growth and realization about the realities of life, love and relationships. I know that as a freshman in high school that you aren't going to have full understanding, but I think that she just saw things in a slanted light without the full stories on what she made her decisions made on.
    I like how things wrapped up though, and I wanted to know what would happen overall, so while I had the above issues, I also didn't want to stop reading and it kept my interest. I liked the friendship between her and Val , that they clicked and understood each other so well. I love when stories emphasize good friendships that can last through the excitement of new boyfriends or even when not-so-smart and harmful to other person decisions are made and there is forgiveness. I also like the closeness of Becca and her sister. Even though a lot of their time together is spent plotting the break-up artist stuff, they do have real conversations and I love how much Becca cared and pushed Diane to face some of the things that was wrong in her life and reconcile with some of her friends.
    Disclaimer: There is cheating, and while I hated every minute of it, I think that it taught that character a lot. It was hard to see it behind a best friend's back, but it was okay for me considering nature of the story as well as drama level. I still don't condone it, but understand that hormones can make us believe crazy stuff and make poor decisions.
    Bottom Line: Solid friendship and family relationships but as expected a lot of drama and people hurt, but also healed.

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  • Posted April 29, 2014

    (Source: I received a digital copy of this book for free on a re

    (Source: I received a digital copy of this book for free on a read-to-review basis. Thanks to Harlequin TEEN and Netgalley.)
    16-year-old Becca is ‘the break-up artist’ – for $100 she’ll break a couple up, just email her.
    When she’s asked to break up the high-school’s golden couple, she’s not sure if she can manage it, but sets out to try anyway.
    Can Becca break up the golden couple? And is breaking up the best thing for everyone involved?


    This was an okay story, but it didn’t really get good until the 77% mark for me.

    Becca was an okay character, and her heart did seem to be in the right place. She genuinely believed that she was helping people by breaking couples up, and based on her sister’s experiences you could see where she would get that idea from. She did annoy me a bit during the second half of the book though, because I couldn’t quite believe what she was doing behind her best-friend’s back!

    The storyline in this was okay, but I didn’t really get into the story until the 77% mark. I didn’t really see Becca’s plans for breaking couples up to be all that great, and she didn’t seem to really DO anything. I felt like nothing much really happened at all, until the point where Becca started to make some very big mistakes.
    The romance in this was okay, but again, I just couldn’t believe what Becca was doing behind her best-friend’s back! To go from one extreme to the other with regards to a certain person was a little sudden, and I just didn’t get how she could do that to her best friend.
    The ending to this was okay, and I liked that Becca began to see that breaking couple’s up wasn’t always the best solution, and that some relationships could be happy. It was a shame that it was only the last 23% of the book that I found entertaining.
    Overall; okay story, but took a while to get interesting,
    6 out of 10.

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  • Posted April 16, 2014

    I received this book in exchange for an honest review from the p

    I received this book in exchange for an honest review from the publisher, via NetGalley.




    Can I just start with how disgusting is Ezra? I mean, I hated the kid. So disgusting, I hated the character straight from the beginning of the book. Ugh, ok, I just had to get that off my chest. Moving on...




    The story is pretty much this: Becca, single, breaks up couples at school for $100 paypal. She is not known by anyone at her school. Only her sister, Diane knows.
    You'd like to think it just goes from there. However, the story has many different stories all together to make one. Diane has her own story, her ex-best friend Huxley, Valerie (Val), Ezra, and even Becca. It just felt there was to much going on in the story to be able to focus. Honestly, I didn't enjoy this book and had a hard time getting through it. It was very obvious. I knew exactly what was going to happen, when, and I predicted the ending.




    The author had a few errors in the writing and some words were ones I didn't know and didn't understand. I also felt that the story line lacked something. I think the problem in the story might have been the fact that the writer was a man and the main character was a female. I don't know, but whatever the problem I couldn't connect with Becca on any level.




    Note: this is just my opinion. Yours could be completely different from mine, and I do still recommend this book to readers who enjoy dramatic contemporary, young adult.




    Rating: 6.1/10
    Parental Rating: 14+

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 22, 2014

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted April 29, 2014

    No text was provided for this review.

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