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The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks [NOOK Book]

Overview


Congratulations, man! By picking up The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks, you are just pages away from finally understanding:

  • How a five-dollar date can get you laid
  • How to stop being friends with girls and start getting them in the sack
  • Where you'll have the best odds of finding a one-night stand, and how to get rid of the ...
See more details below
The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks

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Overview


Congratulations, man! By picking up The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks, you are just pages away from finally understanding:

  • How a five-dollar date can get you laid
  • How to stop being friends with girls and start getting them in the sack
  • Where you'll have the best odds of finding a one-night stand, and how to get rid of the chick the next morning 
  • How to trick a woman into thinking you're classy, even if you have holes in your underwear
  • Why fat chicks always try to keep you from banging their hot friends, and how to finally stop these evil creatures
  • How to stop your wife from nagging you into an early grave
  • Why it's possible to watch six hours of football, put the moves on your neighbor's hot daughter, and leave the toilet seat up in the same day
  • And much more

The Complete A**hole's Guide isn't like all the other candy-ass relationship books on the market; it doesn’t cover issues like romance, love, and finding Miss Right. So, if that's what you're looking for, there are plenty of other books you can hide under your skirt as you skip out of the store. This book is about controlling the women in your life, and never having to say you're sorry . . . EVER AGAIN!

We'll take you from the day you're born to the day you die and show you how women can be manipulated, frustrated, and ultimately dominated throughout the course of a man's life. By illustrating the insanity of the female mind, we'll show you why the flawed chick psyche causes them to continuously fall for the a**hole, no matter how many times they get burned.

If you're not interested, that's fine. We're sure there are ballet classes you need to attend before your wine and cheese party. However, if you are ready, then grab a six-pack, order a pizza, and get your hand out of your pants because you’re about to read the most perverse, sadistic, and hysterical relationship book ever written. Enjoy!

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781466843714
  • Publisher: St. Martin's Press
  • Publication date: 5/10/2013
  • Sold by: Macmillan
  • Format: eBook
  • Edition description: First Edition
  • Pages: 288
  • Sales rank: 472,451
  • File size: 7 MB

Meet the Author


As an attorney, Dan Indante has spent the last 10 years representing talentless writers and entertainers whom he secretly despises. As a human being, he has spent the last 34 years dating heartless, soulless women whom he much more openly despises. Rather than becoming a serial killer, he channeled his rage and bitterness into writing books about the evil inherent in all breast-endowed creatures (except his wife). His parents are bursting with pride that, after spending over $100,000 for his UC Berkeley and Loyola Law School education, they can now boast that their son is the world's foremost a**hole.

Karl Marks is a regular performer in the West Coast comedy circuit, headlining at clubs such as the Improv, Friars Club, and Icehouse. Using the stage as his soapbox, he has successfully offended thousands of hateful women to the raucous applause of drunken men. His material spawns from both time spent at the U. of Southern California, where he double majored in public intoxication and freshman sorority girls, and his many years navigating the thankless, Godforsaken prostitution ring better know as the Los Angeles dating scene. His mother and three sisters should be proud.
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Customer Reviews

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Sort by: Showing all of 14 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 30, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Good stuff.

    The title might be tongue-in-cheek, but I have to say I learned some stuff here. It's not just about "handling" chicks, but handling yourslef, too. A good book with some good stuff.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted March 21, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Entertaining stuff

    One of the older bad boy guides for seducing women using the cocky, edgy angle. Inside you'll find the occasional nuggets of truth, some humor that comes and goes, and a ton of irrelevant pages to flip through. It kind of reminds me of old Andrew Dice Clay or Animal House skits. It's written for comedy, and for the price worth getting. Definitely light reading and entertaining.

    I would skip this if you are a feminist, have no sense of humor, and if you are looking to pick up women.

    A much better and funnier title to couple this with for actual dating advice is
    The Professional Bachelor Dating Guide - How to Exploit her Inner Psycho by Brett Tate.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 1, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Good stuff to know.

    If you are looking for a book on how to play games with women, I don't think this one is it. What I got was more of a way in which to handle women. It is filled with lots of insight that could benefit any guy.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 16, 2007

    Animal House lives on

    This book should be required reading for any fraternity member looking to bust out of his nice guy - friends first persona that kills him with the ladies. There is plenty of slams, rants and toilet humor to make any sober guy bust out laughing over and over. The book is fun, light reading that does not take itself seriously, and you should treat it lightly. A mistake would be to think that most girls fall for this attitude later in life. In college, it doesn't take much to get laid, and this book will show you how to avoid the typical mistakes. Basically, the first lesson guys need to learn is not to be their own cockblock. That's where this book shines. Shut up, and with the right attitude you will score. At age 25, the dating rules change. Girls look at men for free stuff and a lifestyle upgrade, not sex. The sex is just the means to get the lifestyle she expects you to finance. To learn how to work women at that stage, particularly when you have a big salary and money, you must read Tate's The Professional Bachelor. As for now, if you're still in college, or just in the mood for some laughs, get this book and your game will be high. We all wish we were your age again and had this book back then.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 7, 2005

    Official reading material of the DIK

    the Delta Iota Kappa fraternity requires all pledges to read this book. This book is straight to the facts and the stuff actually works. You will have to filter out some of the stuff they tell you cause it could land you in jail, but otherwise nice guys do finish last and this book will try to keep you from staying on the losing team. You shall be an a**hole. go DIKs, get chicks !

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 20, 2003

    Very funny!

    I recently read this book because my friend recommended it. I had actually previously read John Fate¿s ¿The Nice Guys¿ Guide to Getting Girls¿ and really liked that book. It had a lot of good information that I use today and it really works. I¿m not an a**hole or anything, but I decided to read this book anyway because I heard it was such a funny book. My friend was right. This book had me laughing the whole time! The author also knows what he¿s talking about when it comes to women. They are a hard species to understand but this book tries to break it down and does it in such a funny way. Great book!

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 2, 2003

    absolutely brilliant

    This book is so true and honest and funny. Every man with a pulse should be required to read it. I identified with so much of it that I felt relieved to know somebody else out there had the guts to say the things in it. If you want to know how to deal with women and how to cope with how off-the-wall they are, this is the book for you. Simply put, this is the most hysterical book I've ever read.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 6, 2003

    So insanely funny and true

    This book kept my laughing out loud the entire time. I might as well give up on reading beacause there will never be a book as funny and true as this one. Having to eat everyday is just as important as reading this book...thats how great it is..IF YOUR A GUY...GET THE BOOK NOW!!!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 14, 2003

    best book ever

    every guy in the world will find this book funny. This should not be listed as a humor book but as a guide to real life relationships. I wish I had this book when I was growing up.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 24, 2003

    Unbelievable

    Simply the greatest book ever written. Don't buy one, buy one for every person you've ever known and the people you think you'll meet in the future. It's that good. I've gotta go clean the pee off of my jeans, I was laughing so hard.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 15, 2003

    Off the charts funny!

    I got an advance copy from a publisher friend, and I think I laughed out loud AT LEAST every two pages. This may be the funniest book I've ever read.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 10, 2009

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted April 4, 2010

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted October 23, 2010

    No text was provided for this review.

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