The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self

The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self

4.4 13
by Alice Miller
     
 

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As charming performers who skillfully reflect their parents expectations, far too many children grow into adults driven to greater and greater achievements by an underlying sense of worthlessness. Never allowed to express their true feelings, and having lost touch with their true selves, they act out their repressed feelings with episodes of depression and compulsive

Overview

As charming performers who skillfully reflect their parents expectations, far too many children grow into adults driven to greater and greater achievements by an underlying sense of worthlessness. Never allowed to express their true feelings, and having lost touch with their true selves, they act out their repressed feelings with episodes of depression and compulsive behavior. They in turn inflict the same legacy of repression on their own children.

This poignant and thought-provoking book shows how narcissistic parents form and deform the lives of their children. The Drama of the Gifted Child is the first step toward helping readers reclaim their lives by discovering their own needs and their own truth.

Editorial Reviews

Washington Post Book World
A book that patients prescribe...the therapists are reading it because their patients are recommending it.
New York Magazine
Rare and compelling in its compassion and its unassuming eloquence...her examples are so vivid and so ordinary that they touch the hurt child in us all.
Publishers Weekly - Publisher's Weekly
The revised edition of Miller's study of the psychology of successful people features a new introduction by the author; also available in hardcover, $20 *-01694-4 (Aug.)

Product Details

ISBN-13:
9780465016938
Publisher:
Basic Books
Publication date:
06/28/1994
Edition description:
Completely rev. and updated
Pages:
160
Product dimensions:
5.31(w) x 8.01(h) x 0.42(d)

What People are saying about this

Anthony Storr
"Full of wisdom and perception."

Meet the Author


Alice Miller has achieved worldwide recognition for her work on the causes and effects of childhood traumas. Her books include The Drama of the Gifted Child, Banished Knowledge, Breaking Down the Wall of Silence, Thou Shalt Not Be Aware, and For Your Own Good. She lives in Switzerland.

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The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self 4.5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 13 reviews.
Annie48 More than 1 year ago
This book spoke to me directly and compassionately. The various case studies cover a wide range of similar childhood deficits that have led to painful adult insecurities. The "gifted" child (in the title) has the gift of adaptation to his or her childhood environment, but that gift can ultimately deprive the child of his or her true self. Alice Miller shows us how talk therapy and revisiting the past with the clarity of an adult mind can totally liberate us from our childhood prison and how we can finally become the person we were always meant to be. The author tells us how and why this is possible in astonishingly simple terms. Through her words and wisdom, we can at last "get" our past and (hurray!) can finally get over it. Most likely, this book will speak to many people who don't yet realize that you have to first look back before you can look ahead.
Guest More than 1 year ago
This book obviously isn't light reading, but it may be the most insightful book I have ever read regarding personal development. The author's theory is that the basis for all future development is the Parent (especially Mother)/Child relationship. Children need the love of their parents and they will do whatever it takes to get it, subverting their own desires, needs, and even personality. The child will then spend the rest of his or her adult life seeking this unconditional love and acceptance, impacting future relationships with other adults, as well as with his or her own children. This book is written for therapists, by a therapist, but it is not too technical for the layperson to understand. I found that although the book was very short, it took me a long time to read because the concepts are so enlightening that they require contemplation. I have found this material extrememly useful for understanding myself, and I believe reading it has allowed me to become a better parent to my daughter.
Dr-Payam_Ghassemlou More than 1 year ago
Alice Miller writing helps to understand that every individual has an ethical responsibility to look deep within himself (or herself) and become more conscious of how his past is affecting his relationship with himself and others. This inner journey, discovering the truths about our childhoods and not recreating the bad elements in our current relationships is a form of psychological growth through which we can protect the world from further violence.
Guest More than 1 year ago
This book gave me the answers that I was searching for my entire life. It opened the door to my emotional block and allowed me to heal the pain from neglect, emotional and physical abuse. I've read all of Alice Miller's books, but this one was the key. She had the words I needed to hear and she expresses a passion for helping children past and future. Due to Alice Miller , I now know that I have the capacity to love my children and appreciate them as loving human beings that have so much to give us if we would open our eyes and see what is right in front of us. I encourage everyone who is going through childhood trauma to read this book, and I hope it helps them as much as it has helped me.
Guest More than 1 year ago
Alice Miller's compassion for the 'inner child' helped me ease towards feeling compassion for myself, and the repressed child suffering inside me. This book prompted me to seek help and has undoubtedly aided in my search and recovery. I wish everyone had a copy of this book.
Guest More than 1 year ago
It is rare to read about abuse and trauma and their life-long consequences in poetic prose. Alice Miller writes as though she has experienced the slow death of the True Self that comes with all forms of abuse - from beatings and berating to smothering and doting. Indispensable. Sam Vaknin, author of 'Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited'.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Very informative from the self help perspective. This book is cited in later books about the Inner Child. At times confusing as it switches between relating to the self and to practitioners. I'm glad I read it.
hdavenport More than 1 year ago
This book really opened my eyes to how as children, we are often forced to repress our anger, frustration, and rage, especially in response to childhood abuse (whether physical, mental, or sexual). This abuse usually comes from our parents and in idealizing them and believing that our abuse was "for our own good" (the title of another book by Dr. Miller), we push aside our emotions as children only to have the emotions resurface as adults.
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