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TODAY’S MIDDLE SCHOOL GIRLS HAVE IT ROUGH.
In a few short years, they go through an incredible number of biological and emotional changes, making this the most formative—and riskiest—time in their lives. Groups turn on each other, a trusted childhood friend can reveal secrets by sending a text message or updating a Facebook status, and deciding where to sit in the cafeteria can be a daily struggle. As any tween will tell you, life for a middle school girl can be summed up in one word: drama.
Haley Kilpatrick’s own turbulent middle school experience inspired Girl Talk, a nonprofit organization in which high school mentors offer a “just been there” perspective to tween girls, helping them build self-esteem and develop leadership skills. Here, Haley delivers the definitive guidebook, packed with anecdotes from real girls around the country, who offer their insight into:
Why her friends’ approval is suddenly vitally important
Why she feels pressured to be perfect
Why she’s no longer telling her parents everything
What three vital things adults can offer to the girls in their lives to downplay the drama
Filled with practical strategies from tweens and teen mentors to help adults understand what girls today are facing, The Drama Years is a must-read for anyone struggling to help girls navigate the often difficult transition into adolescence.
—Rosalind Wiseman, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes
“The Drama Years is a wonderful, compassionate, and extremely helpful book. It is a must for any parent with a middle-school-age daughter. Haley Kilpatrick tells it exactly – word for word – as it is. She understands what they are going through, and she gives truly helpful and specific advice. The book is upbeat while at the same time it deals with all of the toughest issues that young teenage girls must face. All parents of young teen girls will love it.”
—Anthony E. Wolf, Ph.D., author of Get Out of My Life, But First Could You Drive Me & Cheryl to the Mall?
“Even the closest of parent-child relationships can benefit from this book. The more we listen, the more we help to raise a generation of self-empowered, confident women.”
—Lucy Danziger, SELF Magazine editor-in-chief and author of The Drop 10 Diet and The Nine Rooms of Happiness
“The Drama Years is filled with heart-stirring stories, just-been-there advice from recent teens, and practical, actionable tips for parents. It's full of real girls talking about everything from stress and body image to love and materialism. Reading this book, I cringed in recognition of my own drama years, just wishing this book had been around back then and so grateful I'll have it as a guide for my own daughter.”
—Melissa Walker, cofounder of I Heart Daily and author of Small Town Sinners
“A must-read for any parent struggling to understand her tween daughter and all the ‘drama’ in her life. Haley Kilpatrick tells it from a girl's perspective with real solutions for grownups.”
—Chandra Turner, executive editor, Parents magazine
"Pre-teen years are so tough for girls, and adults often aren't sure how best to help. Thankfully, we have the middle school and high school girls who share their hearts and minds in these pages to guide us, telling parents exactly what will help them survive The Drama Years."
—Julie Foudy, former captain US Women's Soccer Team and Founder of Julie Foudy Sports Leadership Academy
Introduction 1
1 Staying True to Her: Self-Esteem, Self-Awareness, and Self-Respect 15
2 I'm So Stressed!: Handling Everyday Anxiety 37
3 Who Has What: Name Brands, Materialism, and Competition 61
4 Her Body, Herself: Body Image, Weight, and the Pressure to Be Pretty 89
5 BFF's, Frenemies, and Mean Girls: What It Means to Be a Friend 121
6 "It's Not Just Cooties Anymore": Love and Relationships 157
7 Dealing with You: Getting Along with Parents 183
8 It's Not Fair!: Boundaries and Consequences 209
9 Getting Serious: When the Drama Is Very Real 233
Afterword 253
Sources 255
Resources 257
Acknowledgments 265
Index 269
Anonymous
Posted July 13, 2012
Im going to miidle school in like 23 days! Im so exited!!! And i think these books about how to "survive" muddle school are crap. Mostly because im an unpopular, rejected,and(many people call me this name behind my back) retarded. And im very alone too. I had a best friend......... but she decided that all of a sudden i wasnt good enough for her and she needed to let me go. I have almost no friends and a large number of the boys at my school run in the oposite direction when they see me. There are many reasons why they do this. Well actually, only one reason really. They are scared of me! I dont blame them....... i am pretty scary. Im extremely tall for my age(10) and i look like a complete nerd.( starts singing) Ive had pimples since preschool and glasses from when time began........... my face is so messed up it looks like it was hit with a pan! Ive got a temper like a pitbull that was in a pink frilly dress...........my homeworks never done and always look like a mess! Ive got 47 tons of tin in my mouth...... in fact, theres so much, im worried that it may never come out! (music ends) the only place that people like me is online! I have about....27 different boyfriends online and i love it! I must sleep now so good night! Posted by Snapplesauce66.
4 out of 7 people found this review helpful.
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Posted April 25, 2012
The Drama Years is an excellent book looking into the many issues our middle school girls face today. As a middle school teacher, I see these problems throughout my entire school on a daily basis. Not only are the problems the girls are facing destructive to forming and keeping positive relationships, the drama is negatively impacting their personal education and is consuming instructional time. The Drama Years speaks about the new technology such as texting and facebook and how these are also adding to the already difficult years.
Fortunately, this book does not only focus on the hardships of middle school, but offers a solution through "Girl Talk". The three goals Kilpatrick has outlined in the book and through her program are effective in helping young teens face the drama years. I am a strong believer in my students having an older mentor, being involved in an activity, and giving a helping hand.
As a middle school teacher, older cousin, and mentor I am ecstatic to get a chapter of Girl Talk in my school and community as well as share this book with teachers and friends. This is a must read for anyone who interacts with middle school girls! -- Meredith Cox, Middle School Teacher, M.Ed. Vanderbilt University, Behaviorist
4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful? Yes NoThank you for your feedback. Report this reviewThank you, this review has been flagged.Hammering
Posted April 7, 2012
I am the father of a sixth grade girl just starting into these years and needed some extra guidance on this subject. I must say that Haley provides not only the answers to the questions I had; but also covers areas that I had not thought about myself. The book is a must read for anyone who has a daughter dealing with these sometimes difficult times in her life. I thoroughly enjoyed the authors real life experiences and could not put the book down; finding it fascinating to heart " dead on" what she is currently going through in her life. Loved it !!!!! 5 Stars !!
4 out of 5 people found this review helpful.
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Posted January 1, 2012
Has no one read this book? If you have please leave a reveiw.
4 out of 11 people found this review helpful.
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Posted April 6, 2012
Great advice and a must read for all who have a teenage girl in their life!
3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.
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Posted July 2, 2012
HEY I HAVE DRAMA TO AT MY SCHOOL AND ITS NOT ALWASY FUN !!!!!!!!!!!! i m in only in fith grade and i have to deal with it every day .it all your my friend ,now your not
2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.
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Posted February 16, 2013
I am stuck. Me and my friend got in a fight and to get me back she worte my name and a guys name forever on a table. I am freaked. I like him and I told her. He saw what was written. Now, I am afraid to even look at him. Need help a.s.a.p. Thanks, I need it. Also, if you see this and have advice please write it. I only have one week because I go back to school next Monday
So, please help me. I need it!
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted June 30, 2012
This book rules!!
1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.
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Posted April 13, 2012
I feel that this book covers everything needed to know about tipical tweens and their middle school life
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted April 12, 2012
A M A Z I N G ! I have just finished this book and would highly recommend it to ALL teachers, counselors, students, friends, moms, dads, ETC. My heart is so full of compassion I can't even begin to find the right words. I am a mom and this book really made me stop and think about some things these young girls have mentioned and that my daughter delt with during her middle school years. You've heard the old saying "Out of the mouth of Babes" well, read this book and you will know exactly what I'm talking about. Just think about it we send our children to school and from daycare to at least 5th grade everything is repeated to them done for them at home and school in some way or another and they do well. THEN comes middle school WATCHOUT these girls are dealing not only with learning a new way of process in their school but now their bodies are changing, their personalities are changing, some days they do not like themselves let alone anyone else. Then you add in the DRAMA with it, WOW, need I say more. As a parent we like everyone else, get caught up in our on circle then added to the circle is this young girl not knowing which direction to turn that is why when I read this book and going through the 3 steps : An Anchor Activity-outside school activity that she can throw herself into A Helping Hand-an ongoing commitment to volunteer at an organization that she feels passionate about and An adopted older sister a stable role model that she can trust and confide in. It made me realize what I could have done better and in a different way with my daughter. Believe me you will not regret making this purchase in fact you just may do what I have done and paid it forward to someone else in hopes it will help them in some way. Think about it it will be the best money you have ever spent!
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted February 8, 2013
You should really read this book. Belive me, There is ALOT of drama in middle school. Drama about boyfriend or girlfriend, love, upcoming dances ans SO much more! So baisly YOU NEED TO READ THIS BOOK!!!!!!!!!!!
Anonymous
Posted February 3, 2013
this is a good book it has a lot of tips and stuff!!!
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Posted January 6, 2013
Im going to middle school in like idunno 4 months and this book could help also to chat in a chat room go to search and search how to lead anyone to do almost anything and go to reviews and rate it 5 stars plz and for the comment just chat. Thx so much--etrexler
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Posted December 26, 2012
This book toaly stinks never read thi book
0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted November 18, 2012
I only got the sample for this book but I think this is a wonderful book. I am in 6th grade which is the first year of middle school, so I guess that my drama years are just starting. But I can survive because I have a great family, great friends, one very suppportive almost like a sister best friend, and a loyal, loving boyfiend. :-) Good luck to all my fellow tween/teen girls.
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Posted October 4, 2012
Im a seventh grade girl and all there is at my school os drama. LITERALLY. Every girl is talking about what guy they like and how they like someone else nd the guys are always asking girls out and getting rejected. Heres an example i like jimmy but jimmy likes berta ( not really true) sorry if their are any spelling errors im tired and have to get to bed love ya to much drama
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Posted September 11, 2012
Lot of drama comes in middle school this is like a guide to life!
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Posted September 6, 2012
This is good
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Posted August 28, 2012
Finally someone sums up the true HELL we all went through in middle school... go figure its a little late now.
0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.
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Posted August 19, 2012
Well i must say this was a good book and still il im in 8th grade and my mom bought me this when i was in 7grade and it helped e alot because i was in a lot of drama then there was the boys i was just streesed then my mom got me this book and i was so happy:)but now that im in 8th grade i no longer have drama in my life and am care free about boys so if you need help just ask me:)
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Overview
TODAY’S MIDDLE SCHOOL GIRLS HAVE IT ROUGH.
In a few short years, they go through an incredible number of biological and emotional changes, making this the most formative—and riskiest—time in their lives. Groups turn on each other, a trusted childhood friend can reveal secrets by sending a text message or updating a Facebook status, and deciding where to sit in the cafeteria can be a daily struggle. As any tween will tell you, life for a middle ...