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The Emotionally Abused Woman: Overcoming Destructive Patterns and Reclaiming Yourself

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Overview

If you feel unfairly criticized, controlled by others, or are afraid of being lonely, you could be suffering from emotional abuse. Now there is help in this compassionate sourcebook. Bevery Engel, a marriage, family, and child therapist, guides you through a step-by-step recovery process to help you heal the damage done in the past.

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Overview

If you feel unfairly criticized, controlled by others, or are afraid of being lonely, you could be suffering from emotional abuse. Now there is help in this compassionate sourcebook. Bevery Engel, a marriage, family, and child therapist, guides you through a step-by-step recovery process to help you heal the damage done in the past.

Read More Show Less

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780449906446
  • Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
  • Publication date: 2/1/1992
  • Edition description: REISSUE
  • Pages: 256
  • Sales rank: 121,261
  • Product dimensions: 5.12 (w) x 8.00 (h) x 0.47 (d)

Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 10 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 10 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 15, 2007

    Gets down to the difficult work that's VERY necessary for healing

    If you've been in an abusive relationship for any length of time, just one book and just one approach won't do the job to help you truly heal. However, this book is a GREAT tool. It provides insight, comfort, and exercises for healing. It also gives the reader incentive for real work, the tough stuff of finally looking into the real reasons that you've allowed abuse in the first place. Although I FIRMLY agree with the fact that it's NOT all your fault (it wasn't all my fault, not by any means), if you are or were abused, there is history somewhere in your life that requires addressing, by you. Even if you have no past abusers in your life, just the present one, something happened that has resulted in you living with abuse, even if you are always saying 'stop!'. This book helps the reader dig into the reasons they've lived with abuse, so that true change can take place, true healing. BUT, please note: If you have been in an abusive relationship for an extended period of time, several years, as I was, I'd highly suggest reading Patricia Evans' 'The Verbally Abusive Relationship' and 'Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out' either first or at the very least, at the same time. Ms Evans' books do not center as much on the victim's role in allowing the abuse, and I think that it is necessary to cut yourself some serious slack when you first start breaking the pattern of abuse. No need to do ANYTHING that will result in self-imposed guilt! Chances are, someone else is working hard to give you too much un-earned guilt already. All in all, excellent resource. And to anyone suffering abuse, you are not alone, no matter how alone you feel, and you CAN be your own best friend, don't be afraid to give yourself that gift.

    4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 3, 2007

    This books was my savior!

    I wanted to make sure I took the time to give my reviews on this outstanding book. I've been in therapy for well over a year, I've recently separated from my emotionally abusive husband and realized I pretty much have dealt with it my whole life. This book helped me feel I wasn't 'crazy' in that these things were really happening to me and not because of me. I am still on the road to healing but I have to say this book was a great step forward and I thanks Beverly Engle for helping me realize it isn't me. Thank you.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 7, 2005

    Very good

    I read this book after I came to terms with my past. I have been into a emotional abusive relationship for almost 4 years and I really thought it was all my fault and believed that I was a bad person etc. but found the strenght to reclaim myself on my own and think that this book proves that three years ago I chose the right path by reorganizing my life and struggling for becoming the person I had the right to be.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 9, 2003

    Really Informative Book

    After coming out of an abusive relationship, I dealt with the reasons I was with my ex. However, I never got down to the nitty gritty of my TRUE reason for being drawn to abusive types...my negligent father. This book breaks down ways to recapture your inner child & heal in ways I've never tried before. I feel much stronger & I'm working through the anger I still had pent up towards my father. This is a great book for all women who have been abused within a relationship...whether it be a parent, a partner, a boss...

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted July 31, 2002

    What a Wonderful Book!

    Several 'Ah-has' later and I am on the path of reclaiming myself and my emotional recovery. What makes it even more wonderful is that my SO (& current abuser) agrees and is working on his own recovery, as well, after reading this book. As this book will confirm, it takes a victim to be a victim and a victim to be an abuser.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted August 1, 2014

    Good read

    It was surprising to me how much I could relate to myself. I started the book very skeptically, and it took until about a third of the way through before I was able to relate to it. If this book is recommended to you by another person, as it was to me, read it with an open mind. It has exercises in it as well that can benefit just about anyone as we see the patterns that we recreate from our childhood. Again, read it with an open mind.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 22, 2011

    Not What I Expected.

    The book is for already women who have a lot of baggage growing up and continue in a co-dependence in their adult life. This was not me.....my story is I came from a very loving home and family and my husband has graduallly turned verbally bullying me or belittling me....this book doesn't help me in this area at all....he was not like this during our courtship or early marriage its more as my job of raising our children into their adulthood had subsided...he's grown jealous, controlling, and verbablly abusive towards me. This book is for women who had to deal with this type of behaviors or seek people who do this to them. I am not & will not tolerate this behavior...its a shame after being a homemaker for your family which was a decision made by both parties....that your partner turns on you and starts controlling your every move....and I have no skills to earn an income to support myself...and approaching 30 yrs.of marriage its a little late to start a career....so this book was not helpful for me by any means.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 13, 2009

    I Also Recommend:

    Easy and quick to read. Easy to understand and apply to my life. I already recommended it to three of my friends and family memebers.

    Great book for general information. Easy to understand language and case senarios. I found this book helpful in many relationships not just romantic relationships. It helped me to better understand my relationship with my sister as well as mother-in-law! It's easy to downplay emothional abuse, but it's just as damaging to self-esteem as physical abuse and I realize that more after reading this book. A very good read!

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  • Anonymous

    Posted October 7, 2011

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted October 19, 2008

    No text was provided for this review.

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