What Do Exceptional Couples Know That Others Don't?
If roughly fifty percent of marriages fail, what about the other fifty percent--the ones that "succeed"? Are those couples who stay together necessarily happy?
No, not necessarily. In fact, many marriages that remain intact are far less than ideal. A mere seven percent are really good--in fact, exceptional. These couples have much greater than average passion, happiness, longevity, and fulfillment.
But if less-than-exceptional marriages are made up of men who are supposedly from Mars and women who are supposedly from Venus, what planet do exceptional husbands and wives come from? What are the secrets of exceptional couples. . .and what can they teach us?
Marriage therapist Gregory K. Popcak believes that ways of relating employed by exceptional couples can benefit all marriages. In The Exceptional Seven Percent, he looks at the most successful couples and exposes their secrets. Each chapter examines in detail the basic characteristics of exceptional couples, including:
• Developing a marital imperative
• Setting and achieving emotional goals
• Cultivating exceptional levels of fidelity, loving, service, rapport, negotiation, gratitude, joy, and sexuality
Through anecdotes, analyses, exercises, and quizzes, you'll learn what your weaknesses are and how you can begin to make positive changes. You have the power to turn your marriage into the most precious thing in your life. Why settle for anything less?
Gregory K. Popcak, MSW, is a licensed psychotherapist who developed and now runs marriage preparation and enrichment seminars. He also writes regular marriage and family columns for popular and professional journals and runs a private practice. He lives outside Pittsburgh.
With a mature style that is intellectually appealing, Popcak shares his inspiring conviction that marriage can be a powerfully actualizing enterprise. Drawing on the results of several marriage studies, he contends that while most marriages are "conventional" (read: average), and some are even "impoverished," a fortunate 7% are "exceptional." Having a marriage in the exceptional category, says Popcak, requires a commitment to live your life according to a "Marital Imperative," a motto of sorts that identifies the most important qualities that each partner strives to manifest in life through the marriage. This imperative then becomes the basis for all decision making, including even minor daily activities. In this way, exceptional couples exhibit greater congruence between their actions and beliefs and stand a much greater chance of faithfully exemplifying their most desired personal qualities. Like Stephen Covey and Abraham Harold Maslow, Popcak focuses on the refinement of peak performance. Offering engaging exercises and checklists to help readers clarify their aims and progress along his theoretical pathway to self-actualization, he challenges conventional couples to recognize how much better their marriage could be with a few attitude adjustments and priority clarifications. Self-improvement aficionados will find his approach a welcome and refreshing addition to the genre. Illustrations not seen by PW. (June) Copyright 1999 Cahners Business Information.