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The Man I Might Become: Gay Men Write about Their Fathers

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Few men, straight or gay, find the father-son relationship easy, which explains why men's groups overflow with stories of fathers who ignored, brutalized, or otherwise wounded their sons. But gay men find the subject particularly problematic: When they come out to their families, they enter emotional territory their straight counterparts often avoid their entire lives. For many fathers and sons, the deepest feelings often remain unexpressed; if a son is gay, the very act of coming out virtually ensures that ...

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Overview

Few men, straight or gay, find the father-son relationship easy, which explains why men's groups overflow with stories of fathers who ignored, brutalized, or otherwise wounded their sons. But gay men find the subject particularly problematic: When they come out to their families, they enter emotional territory their straight counterparts often avoid their entire lives. For many fathers and sons, the deepest feelings often remain unexpressed; if a son is gay, the very act of coming out virtually ensures that silence will be broken. Now, the pieces in The Man I Might Become—by some of our finest writers, as well as notable newcomers—depict worlds of experience that are sometimes painful, sometimes funny, and always engaging. Including contributions by Andrew Solomon, Jesse Green, Dan Savage, Stephen McCauley, Joseph Hansen, Bernard Cooper, Mark Doty, James Saslow, Jaimé Manrique, and many others, this anthology will take its place as essential reading for every gay man coming to terms with his past, his family, and his own future as a man.

2002 Lambda Literary Award Finalist, Nonfiction Anthology.

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Editorial Reviews

Library Journal
Much has been made of the "cloying mother/ distant father" connection in the development of male homosexuals, but this collection of essays by over two dozen journalists, novelists, playwrights, and poets more truly describes the real range of this often complicated relationship. Indeed, even many of those distant fathers may not realize just how truly influential, for good and bad, they were in their sons' lives. Compiled by the executive editor of Out magazine, this collection runs the emotional gamut from pedestrian confessional to poetic musings that reveal heart-wrenching beauty and tenderness. The best pieces not only describe the father but also illuminate what kind of men their sons have become, although it would have been enlightening to hear more from gay men now becoming fathers themselves. The 28 contributors include Mark Doty, Felice Picano, Bernard Cooper, and many others both well known and not, covering a broad range of geographies and ethnicities. The specificity of the topic might limit this title's appeal, but it is nevertheless recommended for most larger collections.-Jeff Ingram, Newport P.L., OR Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781569245644
  • Publisher: Da Capo Press
  • Publication date: 11/28/2002
  • Pages: 320
  • Product dimensions: 6.16 (w) x 8.94 (h) x 0.89 (d)

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