The Power of Validation: Arming Your Child Against Bullying, Peer Pressure, Addiction, Self-Harm, and Out-of-Control Emotions [NOOK Book]

Overview


Validation?recognizing and accepting your child?s thoughts and feelings, regardless of whether or not you feel that your child should be experiencing them?helps children develop a lifelong sense of self-worth. Children who are validated feel reassured that they will be accepted and loved regardless of their feelings, while children who are not validated are more vulnerable to peer pressure, bullying, and emotional and behavioral problems.

The Power of Validation is an essential...

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The Power of Validation: Arming Your Child Against Bullying, Peer Pressure, Addiction, Self-Harm, and Out-of-Control Emotions

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Overview


Validation—recognizing and accepting your child’s thoughts and feelings, regardless of whether or not you feel that your child should be experiencing them—helps children develop a lifelong sense of self-worth. Children who are validated feel reassured that they will be accepted and loved regardless of their feelings, while children who are not validated are more vulnerable to peer pressure, bullying, and emotional and behavioral problems.

The Power of Validation is an essential resource for parents seeking practical skills for validating their child’s feelings without condoning tantrums, selfishness, or out-of-control behavior. You’ll practice communicating with your child in ways that instantly impact his or her mood and help your child develop the essential self-validating skills that set the groundwork for confidence and self-esteem in adolescence and beyond.

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Editorial Reviews

Library Journal
According to the authors, validation can help children develop autonomy and a secure sense of self, and it may help prevent emotional problems and disorders. If that seems like a lofty claim, be patient for a moment more. Validation is a parenting technique for the long haul and not a response to specific circumstances or problems. Based on the premise that "our quality of life is connected to the quality of our relationships," Hall and Cook (dialectical behavior therapists) illustrate how accepting a child's feelings and thoughts (however illogical they are) teaches him to accept his own identity and perception, in turn decreasing his risk for following the tribe into dangerous behaviors. For parents, this means accepting emotional perceptions before walking a child through logical reasoning (e.g., if your daughter comes home from school claiming that she is fat and no one likes her, one should recognize and validate her feelings of disenfranchisement before outlining her faulty reasoning, which would only add self doubt to her existing feeling of disenfranchisement). VERDICT While the authors are a bit redundant in their presentation, there is valuable advice here. This approach takes mindfulness, patience, and a long-term vision, but parents who are able to help their children trust their emotional landscapes will have an easier time of scaffolding to higher reasoning, in addition to more secure relationships with their youngsters. Highly recommended.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781608826254
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
  • Publication date: 12/1/2011
  • Sold by: Barnes & Noble
  • Format: eBook
  • Pages: 168
  • Sales rank: 384,649
  • File size: 389 KB

Meet the Author


Karyn D. Hall, PhD, is director and owner of the Dialectical Behavior Therapy Center in Houston, TX, and is an advisor, consultant, and trainer with Treatment Implementation Collaborative, LLC. Trained as a child psychologist, she specializes in the prevention and treatment of emotional disorders. Hall works with a dialectical behavior therapy team in Houston, TX, which generously enriches her professional endeavors and offers wisdom on a daily basis.

Melissa H. Cook, LPC, has been intensively trained in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) and validation, and owns a private practice in Houston, TX. She is a renowned speaker on these topics and utilizes the principles of DBT and validation both as a therapist and a mother of three. Cook struggled with and recovered from anorexia and has since dedicated her life to helping others. She lives in Houston, TX, with her children, Stuart, David, and Caroline, and her husband, Douglas, to whom she has been married for over seventeen years.

Foreword writer Shari Y. Manning, PhD, is a founder and chief executive officer of Treatment Implementation Collaborative, LLC. She is author of Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder.

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Table of Contents

Foreword vii

Acknowledgments xi

Introduction 1

1 Understanding Validation 7

2 The Importance of Validation 29

3 Applying Validating Parenting 51

4 Why Parents Invalidate 67

5 Ways Parents Invalidate 87

6 Validating Parenting in Depth 99

7 How to Apply the Levels of Validation to Validating Parenting 113

8 Dealing with Roadblocks to Your Success 129

References 153

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