The Same but Different: how Twins Can Live, Love, and Learn to Be Individuals

by Joan A. Friedman

Overview

Do you sometimes resent your twin and then feel guilty about it? Are you frustrated that no one understands what it is like to be a twin? People think being a twin is mysterious, fun, and magical, but in reality, twin relationships can be difficult to navigate. The Same but Different offers insights on and solutions to the challenges that arise when young adult twins are expected to be independent, self-assured "singletons" after having been raised as twins. This book was written to help twins, their families, and significant others to understand more about the intricacies of adult twin relationships, this book, Instructs twins how to have an honest, authentic relationship, Explains why twins may feel disappointed about friendships that do not match the twin connection, Reveals how influential twin connections are in choice of a spouse, a profession, and a place to live, Offers tips and strategies to navigate the issues of separation, individuality, and codependence, Provides insight and understanding to families and significant others coping with twin struggles

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780989346436
Publisher:	Rocky Pines Press
Publication date:	02/01/2014
Pages:	192
Sales rank:	822,074
Product dimensions:	10.90(w) x 7.30(h) x 0.90(d)

Table of Contents

Preface vii

Chapter 1 Outing Your Feelings 1

Chapter 2 Twin Closeness-Assumptions and Realities 21

Chapter 3 My Twin, My Caretaker 47

Chapter 4 Separation Blues 69

Chapter 5 Comparing the Pair of You 89

Chapter 6 Seeking a Twin-Like Friend or Lover 111

Chapter 7 Conflicting Loyalties 131

Chapter 8 Claiming Your Self 153

Notes 171

Index 173

About the Author 179

Editorial Reviews

★ 03/01/2014
Friedman earned a starred review for her book Emotionally Healthy Twins (LJ 1/08), which focused on parenting techniques for helping twins develop distinct, healthy identities in the face of being born with a double. Here she concentrates on adult twins and the unspoken challenges in this unique relationship that is often both glamorized and idealized, even within families. While outsiders sometimes see twins as celebrities, twins themselves can feel "trapped in a quasimarriage that they didn't choose." Friedman does an excellent job of exploring twinship issues, such as conflicting loyalties and separation blues, and offers solid suggestions for recognizing and addressing feelings that "feel like treason." Chapters end with questionnaires and sidebars for further reflection. The author has an engaging style, with many personal narratives incorporated throughout. VERDICT Friedman acquired her stripes as a twin herself and as the mother of twins—all in addition to her academic credentials as a twin specialist. She is a destination writer for anyone seeking information on this topic. An excellent combination of psychology and self-help; unequivocally recommended.

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