The Things They Cannot Say: Stories Soldiers Won't Tell You About What They've Seen, Done or Failed to Do in War

by Kevin Sites

Overview

“The harrowing accounts detail the experiencesof 11 US soldiers and Marines who have been ravaged by modern warfare and its psychological aftermath. What makes Kevin’s reporting unique and essential is that it didn’t stop on the battlefield—he followed his subjects home.” — Vice

An important look at the unspoken and unknown truths of war and its impact, told through the personal stories of those who have been there.

In The Things They Cannot Say, eleven soldiers and Marines display a courage that transcends battlefield heroics—they share the truth about their wars. For each it means something different: one struggles to recover from a head injury he believes has stolen his ability to love, another attempts to make amends for the killing of an innocent man, while yet another finds respect for the enemy fighter who tried to kill him.

Award-winning journalist and author Kevin Sites asks the difficult questions of these combatants, many of whom he first met while in Afghanistan and Iraq and others he sought out from different wars: What is it like to kill? What is it like to be under fire? How do you know what’s right? What can you never forget?

Sites compiles the accounts of soldiers, Marines, their families and friends, and also shares the narrative of his own failures during war (including complicity in a murder) and the redemptive powers of storytelling in arresting a spiraling path of self-destruction.

He learns that war both gives and takes from those most involved in it. Some struggle in disequilibrium, while others find balance, usually with the help of communities who have learned to listen, without judgment, to the real stories of the men and women it has sent to fight its battles.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780061990526
Publisher:	HarperCollins
Publication date:	01/29/2013
Pages:	295
Sales rank:	407,895
Product dimensions:	5.20(w) x 7.90(h) x 0.80(d)

About the Author

Kevin Sites is an award-winning journalist and author. He has worked as a reporter for more than thirty years, half of that covering war and disaster for ABC, NBC, CNN, Yahoo News, and Vice News. He was a 2010 Nieman Journalism Fellow at Harvard University and a 2012 Dart Fellow in Journalism and Trauma at Columbia University. For a decade he lived and taught in Hong Kong as an associate professor of practice in journalism at the University of Hong Kong. He’s the author of three books on war, In the Hot Zone, The Things They Cannot Say, and Swimming with Warlords. The Ocean Above Me is his first novel. He lives in Oregon.

Table of Contents

Introduction: The Killer in Me xvii

Prologue: Me and My PTSD 1

Part I The Killing Business: What's It Like to Kill in War?

Chapter 1 Killing Up Close 25

Corporal William Wold, U.S.M.C.

3rd Battalion, 1st Marines

The War in Iraq (2004)

Chapter 2 Pulling the Trigger 59

Staff Sergeant Mikeal Auton, U.S. Army

1st Battalion, 4th Infantry

The War in Iraq (2004 and 2006)

Part II The Wounds of War: What's It Like to Be Shot, Bombed or Burned in Combat?

Chapter 3 Survivor's Guilt 77

Lance Corporal James Sperry, U.S.M.C.

3rd Battalion, 1st Marines

The War in Iraq (2004)

Chapter 4 Someone's Not Listening 125

Gunnery Sergeant Leonard Shelton, U.S.M.C.

3rd Battalion, 5th Marines

The Gulf War (1991)

Intermission: The Greatest Veneration: My Father's War 141

Part III Things That Stain the Soul: What Can Never Be Forgotten?

Chapter 5 Dogs of War 153

Specialist Joe Caley, U.S. Army

1st Cavalry, 25th Infantry

The War in Vietnam (1968-70)

Chapter 6 Hung on a Cross 165

First Lieutenant Thomas Saal, U.S.M.C.

3rd Battalion, 5th Marines

The War in Vietnam (1967-68)

Part IV Deadly Honest Mistakes: What's It Like to Kill Your Own Men or Civilians?

Chapter 7 Unfriendly Fire 185

Specialist Michael "Casey" Ayala, U.S. Army

1st Battalion, 327th Infantry

The War in Iraq (2006)

Chapter 8 Making It Right 205

Captain Zachary Iscol, U.S.M.C.

3rd Battalion, 1st Marines

The War in Iraq (2003-05)

Part V Moral Ambiguities: How Do You Know What's Right?

Chapter 9 Morris versus Mo 223

Colonel Morris Goins, U.S. Army

1st Battalion, 12th Cavalry

The War in Iraq (2006-08)

Chapter 10 The Quiet Soldier 233

Major Lior Tailer, Israel Defense Forces

609th Reserve Infantry Unit

The Wars in Lebanon (1989-90 and 2006)

Chapter 11 Into the Deep 255

Corporal Sebastiaan Schoonhoven, Royal Netherlands Army

11th Air Mobile Brigade

The Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan (2004 and 2006)

Epilogue: Deus Ex Machina 277

Acknowledgments 291

What People are Saying About This

Edward Tick

A vivid set of portrats of modern combatants written in prose taht moves with speed and heat.”

Sean Parnell

“Brilliant! An unprecedented view into the heart, mind and soul of American Warriors from every generation. A must read for every American.”

Editorial Reviews

In this riveting and emotionally raw debut, award-winning journalist Sites profiles 11 soldiers (including members of non-American militaries) to explore what it feels like to kill, “be shot, bombed or burned in combat,” and how one goes on living after the fighting dies down. Sites opens candidly with his own experience, describing how a moment of journalistic indifference in 2004 resulted in the murder of a captured Iraqi insurgent, a tragedy the author dwells on intermittently throughout the book. Drawing from interviews and military records, Sites goes on to tell the stories of veterans of the wars in Vietnam, the Persian Gulf, Iraq, Afghanistan, and, in the case of his own father, WWII. Whether stationed in sultry jungles, urban streets, or rugged mountains, soldiers are asked to endure intense physical and mental traumas, and while common threads weave throughout these stories, each is unique: one describes the horror of witnessing the crucifixion of a deceased North Vietnamese Army officer; another tells of the guilt that accompanies friendly fire. But these gripping stories do not equal “an indictment against hope”; they are evidence of a profound desire to heal. Photos. (Jan.)

Publishers Weekly

The harrowing accounts detail the experiencesof 11 US soldiers and Marines who have been ravaged by modern warfare and its psychological aftermath. What makes Kevin’s reporting unique and essential is that it didn’t stop on the battlefield—he followed his subjects home.” — Vice

“Sites highlights the importance of treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder and sharing stories. Most importantly, he forces readers, those average civilians, to look at what war does to people and think about whether it’s always worth it.” — San Francisco Chronicle

A vivid set of portrats of modern combatants written in prose taht moves with speed and heat.” — Edward Tick, Ph. D., codirector of Soldier's Heart and author of of War and Soul

“Riveting and emotionally raw...These gripping stories...are evidence of a profound desire to heal.” — Publishers Weekly

“This is tough stuff, as many of the experiences recounted here are graphic, cruel, and bloody, but they offer an intimate look at the costs of war on a personal, elemental level.” — Booklist

“In sensitive, honest prose, the author emphasizes that this is a book about hope. An important book for warriors and the communities that send them to war.” — Kirkus Reviews

A gritty look at postwar distress, including veterans’ personal accounts, by a journalist with his own intimate perspective on the subject. — Shelf Awareness (Bruce Jacobs of Watermark Books & Cafe, Wichita, KS

From the Publisher

A vivid set of portrats of modern combatants written in prose taht moves with speed and heat.

Edward Tick

A gritty look at postwar distress, including veterans’ personal accounts, by a journalist with his own intimate perspective on the subject.

Shelf Awareness (Bruce Jacobs of Watermark Books & Cafe

The harrowing accounts detail the experiencesof 11 US soldiers and Marines who have been ravaged by modern warfare and its psychological aftermath. What makes Kevin’s reporting unique and essential is that it didn’t stop on the battlefield—he followed his subjects home.

Vice

This is tough stuff, as many of the experiences recounted here are graphic, cruel, and bloody, but they offer an intimate look at the costs of war on a personal, elemental level.

Booklist

Sites highlights the importance of treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder and sharing stories. Most importantly, he forces readers, those average civilians, to look at what war does to people and think about whether it’s always worth it.

San Francisco Chronicle

Absolutely brilliant! Kevin Sites is a masterful storyteller. The Things They Cannot Say gives the reader an unprecedented view into the heart, mind and soul of American Warriors from every generation. A stunning, courageous work of impeccable depth and candor, written by a man who has seen more war than anyone I’ve ever met. This book is a must read for every American.

Sean Parnell

Sites highlights the importance of treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder and sharing stories. Most importantly, he forces readers, those average civilians, to look at what war does to people and think about whether it’s always worth it.

San Francisco Chronicle

This is tough stuff, as many of the experiences recounted here are graphic, cruel, and bloody, but they offer an intimate look at the costs of war on a personal, elemental level.

Booklist

A gritty look at postwar distress, including veterans’ personal accounts, by a journalist with his own intimate perspective on the subject.

Shelf Awareness (Bruce Jacobs of Watermark Books & Cafe

A gritty look at postwar distress, including veterans’ personal accounts, by a journalist with his own intimate perspective on the subject.

Shelf Awareness (Bruce Jacobs of Watermark Books & Cafe)

A gritty look at postwar distress, including veterans’ personal accounts, by a journalist with his own intimate perspective on the subject.

(Bruce Jacobs of Watermark Books & Cafe) - Shelf Awareness

Veterans from Vietnam to Iraq and Afghanistan--including Sites himself as a war correspondent (In the Hot Zone: One Man, One Year, Twenty Wars, 2007)--tell their tales of the struggle to survive on and after the battlefield, in the hopes that such storytelling may be a way "to release warriors from the bonds of their own silence." Lance Cpl. James Sperry writes, "I am only twenty-four and have lived a life I wish on no one." Such is the common thread of despair to be found among these warriors' tales. In combat, they did and saw things no one should endure. They killed--the enemy, civilians, their own troops as a result of friendly fire. They saw friends blown apart, and they were wounded. They grew rabid with anger and a desire to kill. Then they were expected to return to friends, family and community unchanged from these horrors. But this was not possible, as veteran after veteran experienced PTSD. Too often in silence, combat veterans suffered from an inability to reconnect, to love, to be simply normal. Sites includes himself among the lost, as he recounts how his "confused incompetent inaction" led to the murder of Iraqi insurgent Taleb Salem Nidal. Sites thus joined the ranks of those suffering from PTSD--covering guilt, shame and fear in a haze of alcohol and marijuana, numbed by taking "a chef's salad of [prescribed] drugs every day," losing wives and loved ones who could not understand their sullen withdrawal. However, in sensitive, honest prose, the author emphasizes that this is a book about hope. Most of the wounded warriors eventually found their way back, including Sites, and part of the healing process involves telling their stories. The author allows himself and the combat veterans he interviews the space to do so. An important book for warriors and the communities that send them to war.

Kirkus Reviews