The Unoffical Guide to Disneyland 2000

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From the publishers of The Unofficial Guide? to Walt Disney World? "A Tourist's Best Friend!" ?Chicago Sun-Times "Indispensable" ?The New York Times The Top 10 Ways The Unofficial Guide? to Disneyland? Can Help You Have the Perfect Trip:
  1. Every attraction rated and ranked for each age group, based on interviews and surveys of more than 6,100 families
  2. When to go: the best ...
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From the publishers of The Unofficial Guide® to Walt Disney World® "A Tourist's Best Friend!" —Chicago Sun-Times "Indispensable" —The New York Times The Top 10 Ways The Unofficial Guide® to Disneyland® Can Help You Have the Perfect Trip:
  1. Every attraction rated and ranked for each age group, based on interviews and surveys of more than 6,100 families
  2. When to go: the best times of year and the best days of the week
  3. Comprehensive coverage of Universal Studios Hollywood
  4. All the Disneyland area hotels rated and ranked for value and quality of rooms
  5. Field-tested touring itineraries for adults and families with children
  6. Reviews of all full-service restaurants in Disneyland
  7. Tips and warnings for first-time visitors and those with special needs
  8. Proven strategies for planning the perfect Disneyland vacation with small children
  9. How to find and meet the Disney characters
  10. Unvarnished, practical advice for families, couples, honeymooners, and singles
This guide is a completely independent evaluation of Disneyland and has not been reviewed or approved by Walt Disney World or the Walt Disney Company, Inc. Find us online at
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What People Are Saying

John Clayton
This literally intriguing and mesmerizing book tells you things about Disneyland that you could never have imagined. Even if you've been there before, this book is still worth getting because it's so fascinating.-From "On the Road with John Clayton", KKGO Radio, Los Angeles
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780028630427
  • Publisher: Wiley, John & Sons, Incorporated
  • Publication date: 8/15/1999
  • Series: Unofficial Guides Series , #247
  • Edition number: 1
  • Pages: 288
  • Product dimensions: 5.25 (w) x 8.17 (h) x 0.66 (d)

Read an Excerpt

The Importance of Being Goofy
"Sir, we have a problem."
Disney's Vice President looked up from his desk to see the Assistant VP. standing there, nervously fingering a file stuffed with paperwork. The VP sighed. "What is it now? Did the tabloids find out about Minnie and Yosemite Sam?"
The Assistant VP shook his head. "No, we think she dumped him over hygiene issues," he said. "This is another problem. A really serious problem." "All right, let me have it," said the VP, hoping it wasn't more trouble about Donald Duck not wearing pants.
"We," said the Assistant VP, "are out of ideas."
After a moment, the VP laughed. "You can't be serious. We have a thousand people working overtime in the Creative Department."
"They're out," said the Assistant VP, spreading his arms helplessly. "And it's not just them. We're all out. The entire human race is out of ideas. We have nothing left to use for next year's animated summer blockbuster, which would then lead to merchandise, theme park rides, fast food tie-ins, and the direct-to-video sequel."
Recognizing the severity of the situation, the VP began to concentrate. He wasn't head of Acquisitions for nothing. "No problem. We'll just use an old book whose copyright has expired, like The Hunchback of Notre Dame or Tarzan."
"They've all been done," said the Assistant VP dolefully, opening his file folder and reading aloud. "All literature and history have been entirely optioned, produced, and/or tied up in royalties litigation by Disney or our competitors."
"Everything?" asked the VP, aghast.
"Everything," answered the Assistant VP. "Well, except for Chicken Soup for the Vegetarian's Soul, which Marketing has some kind of problem with." "I don't believe this," said the VP angrily. "What about, um, The Old Man and the Sea? I read that in high school."
The Assistant VP looked through his papers. "In production at Universal. Voices by Brad Pitt as the old man and Julia Roberts as the fish he loves." "Okay, we'll go back further...what about...A Tale of Two Cities?" "Script is in at Miramax, with Oliver Stone attached to direct. We could steal it for animation, but that's our big Oscar contender."
"How about Moby Dick?"
"TV movie, with low ratings."
"Romeo and Juliet?"
"Leonardo di Caprio a few years ago. Pre-Titanic, yesterday's news."
"The Old Testament?"
"Dreamworks already did Prince of Egypt."
"All right!" shouted the VP angrily, slamming his fist to the desk. "There's only one thing left to do."
"What?" asked the Assistant VP, mystified.
The VP swiveled around in his chair, looking out over the Hollywood hills. He'd always known this day would come, but he'd hoped it wouldn't be during his watch.
"It's time to start cross-pollinating our existing products," he said calmly. "Tell everyone in Creative to start work on Pocahontas: The Little Hunchback Mermaid of Notre Dame."
And so it goes....
What really makes writing about Disneyland fun is that the Disney people take everything so seriously. Day to day they debate momentous decisions with far-ranging consequences: Do you think Goofy would look swishy in a silver cape? Have we gone too far with the Little Mermaid's cleavage? At a time when the whole nation is concerned about the drug problem, can we afford to have a dwarf named "Dopey"?
Unofficially, we think having a sense of humor is pretty important. This guidebook has a sense of humor, and it is probably necessary that you do, too....Not to use this book, but more significantly, to have fun at Disneyland. Disneyland (in the popular phrasing) is the mother of all tourist attractions. A certain amount of levity is required simply to survive. Think of the Unofficial Guide as a private trainer to help get your sense of humor in shape. It will help you understand the importance of being Goofy.
The Death of Spontaneity
One of our all-time favorite letters is from a man in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. He writes:
Your book reads like the operations plan for an amphibious landing....Go here, do this, proceed to Step 15....You must think that everyone [who visits Disneyland] is a hyperactive, Type-A, theme-park commando. Whatever happened to the satisfaction of self-discovery or the joy of spontaneity? Next you will be telling us when to empty our bladders.
As it happens, we at the Unofficial Guide are a pretty existential crew. We are big on self-discovery when walking in the woods or watching birds. Some of us are able to improvise jazz without reading music, while others can whip up a mean pot of chili without a recipe. When it comes to Disneyland, however, we all agree that you either need a good plan or a frontal lobotomy. The operational definition of self-discovery and spontaneity at Disneyland is the "pleasure" of heat prostration and the "joy" of standing in line.
It's easy to spot the free spirits at Disneyland Park and Disney's California Adventure, particularly at opening time. While everybody else is stampeding to Splash Mountain or Indiana Jones, they are the ones standing in a cloud of dust puzzling over the park map. Later, they are the people running around like chickens in a thunderstorm trying to find an attraction with less than a 40-minute wait. Face it, Disneyland Resort is not a very existential place. In many ways it's the quintessential system, the ultimate in mass-produced entertainment, the most planned and programmed environment imaginable. Spontaneity and self-discovery work about as well at Disneyland as they do on your tax return.
We're not saying you can't have a great time at Disneyland. Bowling isn't very spontaneous either, but lots of people love it. What we are saying is that you need a plan. You don't have to be compulsive or inflexible about it, just think about what you want to do before you go. Don't delude yourself by rationalizing that the information in this modest tome is only for the pathological and super-organized. Ask not for whom the tome tells, Bubba, it tells for thee.
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Table of Contents

List of Illustrations and Maps.



1. Planning Before You Leave Home.

2. Basic Essentials.

3. Disneyland with Kids.

4. Disneyland in Detail.

5. Touring Plans.

6. Universal Studios Hollywood.


Readers' Questions to the Author.

Readers' Comments.


Clip-Out Pocket Outlines of Touring Plans.

Reader Survey.

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 5
( 2 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 2 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 29, 2004

    works like a charm

    I bought several guide books for our Disney trip last summer, but sensed right away that this title was the real deal. With tear out mini charts in the back to help you navigate each of the parks, it simply can't be beat. We went with another family, but seperated once we got to each park, hooking up for meals and to go back to the hotel at the end of each day. I read this book cover to cover and guided our family with our mini list designed to help us see the maximum number of attractions in the most pleasant way, involving the least amount of waiting in lines. Even though we attended the parks during peak season, we saw and rode EVERY recommended attraction each day in each of the parks. Our friends who didn't use this guide saw approx. HALF the attractions we did. This book rocks! Put it to work for you on your Disney trip. While our friends were waiting in long lines and trying to figure out what to do next, we KNEW where to go, what were the hotest rides and shows, and how to organize our day to avoid lines. I highly recommend this book. Study it before your trip, then tuck the tiny tearout sheets in your shorts pocket each morning. You will be amazed how well their suggestions will work for your trip.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 4, 2000

    The most fun ever at the park

    I first used this book with some teen aged nephews and we had the best time. We stayed at the hotel, got in early, raced around the park, and were done with the best rides before 11 am. It makes the whole experience that much more, with tips and guides that any age can use. I always recommend it to everyone I hear thats going, and everyone that takes one of our three older copies, finds it the best, Thanks

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