They Were Still Born: Personal Stories about Stillbirth

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Overview

Stillbirth, defined as the death of an infant between 20 weeks' gestation and birth, is a tragedy repeated thirty thousand times every year in the United States. That means more than eighty mothers a day feel their babies slip silently from their bodies, the only sound in the delivery room their own sobs. Eighty stillborn babies a day means heartbroken families mourn the death of children who will never breathe, gurgle, learn to walk, or go to school. In 2006, Janel Atlas became one of those mothers who left the ...
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They Were Still Born: Personal Stories about Stillbirth

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Overview

Stillbirth, defined as the death of an infant between 20 weeks' gestation and birth, is a tragedy repeated thirty thousand times every year in the United States. That means more than eighty mothers a day feel their babies slip silently from their bodies, the only sound in the delivery room their own sobs. Eighty stillborn babies a day means heartbroken families mourn the death of children who will never breathe, gurgle, learn to walk, or go to school. In 2006, Janel Atlas became one of those mothers who left the hospital with empty arms; her second daughter, Beatrice Dianne, was stillborn at 36 weeks. Reaching out for comfort, she realized a dire need shared by so many others like her, and so was born a collection of new essays by writers each sharing their firsthand experiences with stillbirth. Atlas includes selections not only from mothers but also fathers and grandparents, all of whom have intimate stories to share with readers. In addition, there are selections that answer many of the medical questions families have in the wake of a stillbirth and that offer the latest research on this devastating loss and how it might be prevented. Grieving parents will find in these pages the comfort of knowing they are not alone on this painful path, validation of their babies' lives, and guidance from those who have suffered this tragedy. In addition, They Were Still Born both inspires and shows readers how to honor and remember their own babies and stories of loss. No parent- or grandparent-to-be sets out planning to purchase They Were Still Born. Unfortunately, there will always be readers-devastated, grieving, and searching for voices to help them through-who need it.
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Editorial Reviews

Delaware Online
The nearly two-dozen-chapter book's authors include a wide variety of men and women — a bereavement specialist, an obstetrician, a staff writer for The Washington Post, a registered nurse, a professor, an anthropologist, and more, all of whom share their experiences....In addition to the poignant essays, They Were Still Born includes a section called "The Way Forward," which features ideas for honoring and remembering your baby and engaging in creative expressions of grief. It also includes chapters on what doctors currently know about stillbirth, as well as emerging research on the topic. There is also a 10-page listing of resource books for adults and children, support networks, blogs and more.
The Lancet
There is useful information about the need for more autopsies following stillbirth and better data collection to assist with research into 'unexplained' stillbirth. Overall, this book should be a valuable resource not only for mothers grieving for a stillborn child, but also for their partners, relatives, and the wider community.
Christiane Northrup
As is true for all obstetricians, I was confronted with the reality of stillbirth early on in my career. Nothing prepares mothers for this potentially devastating experience. The process must be shared and grieved if the wounds are to fully heal. They Were Still Born helps this process enormously. This collection is beautiful, moving, and healing.
Lorraine Ash
These courageous, moving accounts from the fierce front lines of infant loss are filled with rare beauty and insistent love. They Were Still Born will help heal the bereaved and illuminate a culture that has for too long closed its eyes to the pain and devastation of stillbirth. A tour de force.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781442204126
  • Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield Publishers, Inc.
  • Publication date: 12/16/2010
  • Pages: 280
  • Sales rank: 1,288,725
  • Product dimensions: 6.20 (w) x 9.10 (h) x 1.00 (d)

Meet the Author

Janel Atlas is a writer and editor whose work has appeared in various regional and national publications. Since her daughter’s stillbirth, in 2006, Atlas has written extensively about pregnancy and infant loss. She now lives in Delaware with her husband, two daughters and one son.
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Table of Contents

1 Forward 2 Introduction 3 One: What No One Tells You 4 Two: Blindsided 5 Three: Two Children, One Living 6 Four: The Traumatic Contradiction 7 Five: Living With (and Without) Caleb 8 Six: He Changed Our World 9 Seven: Mothering Grief 10 Eight: In a Wild Place 11 Nine: Born, Again 12 Ten: Just One Family 13 Eleven: Then Comes the Baby in the Baby Carriage 14 Twelve: A Plan Gone Awry 15 Thirteen: Saying "Grace": Family and Friend's Responses to My Daughter's Stillbirth 16 Fourteen: Our Christmas Angel 17 Fifteen: She Was Significant 18 Sixteen: How Death Can Bring Life: A Caregiver's Perspective 19 Seventeen: Invincible No More: What My Daughter's Stillbirth Taught Me About Life 20 Eighteen: Reunion Group 21 Nineteen: Standing in the Shadow of Grief 22 Twenty: Grief and Creativity 23 Twenty-one: The Year of Angels 24 The Way Forward 25 Twenty-two: Honoring and Remembering 26 Twenty-three: Creative Expressions of Grief 27 Twenty-four: What We Know About Stillbirth 28 Twenty-five: Emerging Research 29 Twenty-six:Making a Difference: Resources
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 5
( 4 )
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Sort by: Showing all of 4 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 23, 2011

    Great support book

    I was greatly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book. Considering the subject, enjoy might seem like an unusual word to use, but I honestly did. I had put off reading the book since I knew I would read it through tears and relive all the horror of the loss of our granddaughter --- and I did. But in reading I discovered people, real people, with real stories. I found myself finishing one story and wanting to go on to the next, to share another person's experience. I found some of the chapters to be a little cliché and some borderline mystic, but they reflect a multitude of personalities and emotions, and each person shared from his/ her own depth. The book not only accomplishes its purpose to show the significance of each very short life, but also gives practical encouragement: life changes with such a loss, but it does go on; there are many ways help yourself and others; there is information out there, but there needs to be more research. They Were Still Born validates the unique experience of every person who has had to go through a still birth, and gives some help for the future.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 21, 2010

    Beautiful Collection

    A beautiful collection of honest stories of loss full of real emotion. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has suffered the loss of a baby, as well as the family and friends of those who have lost.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 10, 2013

    Must read for those who have experienced the loss of a baby

    This was a slow read. I read and experienced each loss, and felt the emotions of each parent/grandparent as they wrote about their tragedy, and how they continued forward. After each story I had to pause and reflect, which made it a slow read, but I just couldn't go on to the next without some pause for reflection. You experience the death of each baby with them. Each death is unique, yet there are comonalities in each story, as our grief process. Most importantly, you realize you are not alone, and there are others who have thought your feelings.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 3, 2010

    No text was provided for this review.

Sort by: Showing all of 4 Customer Reviews

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