The Tighty Whitey Spider: And More Wacky Animal Poems I Totally Made Up

by Kenn Nesbitt, Ethan Long

Overview

Another side-splitting collection of poetry from beloved children's poet Kenn Nesbitt!

Following up the bestselling collection, My Hippo Has the Hiccups, Kenn Nesbitt dares to go where no poet has gone before, creating a whole host of laugh-out-loud scenarios involving animals doing extreme sports.

Kids love Kenn's clever word play and wonderful imagery. This collection also includes an audio CD of Kenn reading the poems in his inimitable style. And Ethan Long provides the perfect complement to Kenn's poetry with his brilliant line drawings.

With poems like "My Puppy Punched Me in the Eye" and "I Bought Our Cat a Jetpack," this collection shines bright with rhymes that are full of jokes, thrills, and surprises. Animals Doing Extreme Sports will keep kids laughing—and loving poetry.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781402248184
Publisher:	Sourcebooks
Publication date:	04/01/2010
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	128
File size:	1 MB
Age Range:	7 - 12 Years

About the Author

Kenn Nesbitt is the author of several collections of funny poetry for kids, including My Hippo Has the Hiccups, Tighty Whitey Spider, Revenge of the Lunch Ladies, and The Aliens Have Landed at Our School! Kenn travels the country, visiting over 70 schools each year. His website, Poetry4Kids.com, is the most popular children’s poetry website in the world.

Ethan Long has written more than 100 books for children, including the 2013 Theodor Seuss Geisel Award winning Up, Tall and High! He lives in Orlando, Florida. Visit ethanlong.com.

Read an Excerpt

My Kitten Won't stop Talking

My kitten won't stop talking.
She just prattles night and day.
She walks around repeating
nearly everything I say.

My kitten never says, "Meow."
She never even purrs.
She mimics me instead
in that annoying voice of hers.

She waits for me to speak,
and then she copies every word,
or begs me for a cracker,
or says, "I'm a pretty bird."

I'm not sure what to do, and so
I simply grin and bear it.
She's been this way since yesterday;
that's when she ate my parrot.

My Kiwi Is the Captain

My kiwi is the captain of a supersonic plane
that doesn't fly to Switzerland or Singapore or Spain.
It doesn't fly to Jordan or Jamaica or Japan,
or Serbia, Somalia, Samoa, or Sudan.

It doesn't fly to Norway, Nicaragua, or Nepal.
It's safe to say it doesn't fly to anywhere at all.
But that's the way it always goes for kiwis, as you've heard.
It's true that he's a pilot, but he's still a flightless bird.

I Have to Write a Poem

I have to write a poem,
but I really don't know how.
So maybe I'll just make a rhyme
with something dumb like "cow."

Okay, I'll write about a cow,
but that's so commonplace.
I think I'll have to make her be...
a cow from outer space!

My cow will need a helmet
and a space suit and a ship.
Of course, she'll keep a blaster
in the holster on her hip.

She'll hurtle through the galaxy
on meteoric flights
to battle monkey aliens
in huge karate fights.

She'll duel with laser sabers
while avoiding lava spray
to vanquish evil emperors
and always save the day.

I hope the teacher likes my tale,
"Amazing Astro Cow."
Yes, that's the poem I will write
as soon as I learn how.

Table of Contents

The Tighty Whitey Spider 1

My Dog Plays Invisible Frisbee 2

My Kitten Won't Stop Talking 3

Molly Has a Myna Bird 4

My Kiwi Is the Captain 6

Frog Ball 7

I Bought Our Cat a Jet Pack 8

I Have to Write a Poem 10

My Chicken's on the Internet 12

Snake Mistake 14

My Dog Is Not like Other Dogs 16

My Cat Goes Flying through the Air 17

A Rock Makes an Excellent Puppy 18

Don't Ever Ask a Centipede 20

Polar Bowling 21

Has Anyone Seen My Chameleon? 22

Ferret Soccer 24

I Like My Triangular Kitten 26

Today I Touched the Buffalobster 28

I Bought a New Tank for My Goldfish 30

The Elephants Bounced 31

If You Give a Mouse a Motorcycle 32

On Top of Mount Everest 35

An Ordinary Day 38

The Dancing Baboon of Djibouti 40

When Pigs Fly 42

My Hamster Has a Skateboard 44

While Lying on the Grass Today 46

Just a Slug 48

Banana Dan 50

Gabby's Baby Beagle 52

Gerbil, Gerbil, On the Run 54

Speedy Sid 56

My Turtle Is the Sporting Sort 57

Abrocat the Acrobat 58

Hippo Sandwich 60

Belinda Bell 61

Beavers in the Bathroom 62

Forty Purple Porpoises 64

Whenever Yaks Play Basketball 66

My Camel Fights 67

From the Ants in Our Petunia Bed 68

Toby the Snowboarding Doberman 70

At Hamster Sam's Rodeo 71

My Parrot Doesn't Care to Fly 72

When Rattlesnakes Wear Roller-Skates 74

The Weasel and the Whale 76

Get Me Out of the Fish Tank 81

We're Skydiving Elephants 82

Gordon's Garden 84

Cara's Parrot 86

My Dog Is Running Faster 88

Monkey Dream 90

Kitten Fight 92

I Saw a Sloth Play Soccer 93

An Elephant Followed Me Home 94

If You Happen to Hop 96

I Have an Amoeba 97

Editorial Reviews

"It’s official: Kenn Nesbitt’s poetry is kid- and parent-approved! His ‘wacky animal poems’ carry the common thread of silly critters in impossible situations – a recipe for laugh-out-loud page-turning fun." — She is too Fond of Books

"So many of the poems are funny, but they are also very smart and full of little twists. I know kids will love the surprise endings. I think this really is a book that kids will want to read over and over again — even those reluctant readers." — Booking Mama

" Kenn Nesbitt combines animals and craziness into some wacky poems. " — The Brain Lair

"The Tighty Whitey Spider is exactly the kind of book my daughter would have loved when she was in elementary school. I can’t think of a better way to help younger children develop an early appreciation for poetry than reading Nesbitt’s poems." — The Mother Daughter Book Club

"Yes, they are funny and a little wacky - this book should have you chuckling with smiles." — Homeschool Buzz

"Nesbitt’s poems are funny and have a well, wacky off-beat kind of humor that really connects with kids (and their teachers and parents, I might add)." — Lit for Kids

"The poems aren’t dull and boring, they are full of action and fun...If all poetry was this exciting, I’d definitely read more!" — Jenns Bookshelves

"...his new book, The Tighty Whitey Spider (with illustrations by Ethan Long) would make me a fan even if I wasn't already one." — Gotta Book

"First of all, the main little critter is sporting nothing but his tighty whitey underwear. This alone had my kids giggling." — KC Books

"...they'll be creeping and crawling to get their hands on this collection of zany rhymes." — Children’s Book Review

From the Publisher