Together: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World

by Vivek Murthy

Overview

Humans are social creatures: in this simple and obvious fact lies both the problem and the solution to the current crisis of loneliness. In his groundbreaking book, the 19th Surgeon General of the United States Dr. Vivek Murthy makes a case for loneliness as a public health concern: a root cause and contributor to many of the epidemics sweeping the world today from alcohol and drug addiction to violence to depression and anxiety. Loneliness, he argues, is affecting not only our health but also how our children experience school, how we perform in the workplace, and the sense of division and polarization in our society.

But, at the center of our loneliness is our innate desire to connect. We have evolved to participate in community, to forge lasting bonds with others, to help one another, and to share life experiences. We are, simply, better together.

And yet, in spite of our desire to connect, Dr. Murthy found loneliness in the stories of people everywhere and he wanted to know why. He traveled the country and abroad, meeting with doctors, scientists, children, parents, and community members, and looked to the latest science to better understand why people are feeling so disconnected. It’s no surprise, that in our increasingly complex world, Murthy found equally complex forces contributing to loneliness.

While technology promises to connect us, it can also isolate; while mobility means our loved ones are only a train ride or flight away, we also move away from the communities where we grew up; while we increasingly have the opportunity to pursue our individual destinies, we can put our own goals ahead of our relationships and community; and despite all of the progress we have made in how we talk about mental health, we are still ashamed of feeling lonely. Dr. Murthy further contextualizes the subject with explorations of the social and evolutionary implications of our need to connect and what happens when we find ourselves untethered.

The good news is that with awareness of the causes of our loneliness, comes creative solutions to help ourselves and those we love to create more connected lives. Together offers inspiring and encouraging stories of individuals and communities who are making great strides in helping us to understand that we are not alone.

Told with great compassion and hope, Dr. Murthy makes a powerful and convincing argument for why we can and must build a more connected world.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781094120218
Publisher:	HarperCollins Publishers
Publication date:	04/28/2020
Product dimensions:	6.00(w) x 1.50(h) x 5.00(d)

About the Author

Dr. Vivek H. Murthy served as the 19^th Surgeon General of the United States appointed by President Barack Obama.  As the Vice Admiral of the US Public Health Service Commissioned Corps, he commanded a uniformed service of 6,600 public health officers globally. During his tenure, Dr. Murthy launched the TurnTheTide campaign, catalyzing a movement among health professionals to address the nation’s opioid crisis. He also issued the first Surgeon General’s Report on Alcohol, Drugs, and Health, calling for expanded access to prevention and treatment and for recognizing addiction as a chronic illness, not a character flaw. An internal medicine physician and entrepreneur, Dr. Murthy has co-founded a number of organizations: VISIONS, an HIV/AIDS education program in India; Swasthya, a community health partnership in rural India training women as health providers and educators; software company TrialNetworks; and Doctors for America.

Dr. Murthy received his bachelor’s degree from Harvard and his M.D. and M.B.A. degrees from Yale. He completed his internal medicine residency at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston and later joined Harvard Medical School as faculty in internal medicine. His research focused on vaccine development and later on the participation of women and minorities in clinical trials.  Dr. Murthy resides in Washington, D.C. with his wife and two you young children.

Editorial Reviews

02/24/2020

The compassionate first book from former Surgeon General Murthy draws attention to loneliness as a major public health risk. Drawing on current research and on personal experience as a physician to show how social isolation can exacerbate ailments such as heart disease, as well as mental health issues, Murthy demonstrates that human connection is an innate need. With urgency but not stridence, he argues for a renewed culture of civic engagement to strengthen the “prepolitical layer of voluntary associations” that De Tocqueville identified as cohesive for American life. Rather than people who are experiencing loneliness themselves, Murthy’s intended readership consists of those who want to help, whether as medical professionals, social workers, teachers, or community volunteers. He offers them plenty of encouragement, with success stories from his own experience with patients and from others’ grassroots initiatives. As an example of how to strengthen the place of community in one’s life, he describes how the Physician Moms’ Group, formed by a stressed doctor and new mother trying to connect with others like herself, grew from 20 to 70,000 members. His gentle approach to the topic has profound implications for both individual health care and community wellness. Agent: Richard Pine, InkWell. (Apr.)

Publishers Weekly

"Some books enlighten, but others stun. Together is a stunner. It made me rethink much of what I believe about physical health, public policy, and the human condition. By revealing America’s epidemic of loneliness—and then offering an array of remedies for the condition—Murthy has done a great service, and made Together the most important book you’ll read this year.

Daniel H. Pink

Sometimes the most obvious thing is the hardest to see. Thank goodness we have Dr. Vivek Murthy to light the way toward understanding loneliness and its dark corners. This book is a gift for us all.

Susan Cain

I love both the message and the messenger of this brilliant book. Listen to what Vivek Murthy has to say about social connection—and then take his advice. It’s exactly what the doctor ordered.

Angela Duckworth

Profound, empathic, and ultra-savvy about the plight of disconnect and the power of human connection, this book is a balm and an inspiration. Together offers a convincing diagnosis of a public health epidemic of loneliness in our time, and is also a well-articulated etiology, prognosis, and treatment plan based on kindness and caring for each other.

Jon Kabat-Zinn

One of our most beloved surgeon generals, Murthy has a big heart and a big message. We have a massive, deadly epidemic hidden in plain sight: loneliness. It is as harmful to health as smoking and far more common. And as his gripping stories of the science and suffering make clear, we can do something about it. Together is fascinating, moving, and essential reading.

Atul Gawande

Vivek Murthy reminds us that our national conversation about medicine has been too narrowly focused on hospitals, doctors, and drugs—and not enough on the human connections that sustain us. Together stands with Atul Gawande’s classic Being Mortal.

Malcolm Gladwell

Together is an extraordinary and essential book for our time. With powerful stories and sobering truths, Dr. Murthy does a masterful job of showing how, even in the digital age, there’s no substitute for authentic human connection.

Ben Silbermann

In Together, Vivek Murthy has put his finger on an important and under-recognized health hazard. By identifying loneliness as a key factor underpinning so many mental and physical illnesses, he opens the door to acceptance and offers much-needed solutions. We need Murthy’s book now more than ever.

David A. Kessler

2020-01-26
The former surgeon general examines the health crises brought on by a more overarching plague: loneliness.

“For more than a century,” writes Murthy, “the physicians holding this office [the surgeon general’s] have addressed national health crises ranging from yellow fever and influenza outbreaks to the aftermath of hurricanes and tornados to the terrorist attacks on 9/11.” The epidemic he was called on to address took more insidious forms: eating disorders, depression, opioid and other chemical addiction, and suicide. All have in common a source in social dislocation—but not isolation, since being able to be alone can be a healthy thing—that in turn produces loneliness, the inability to summon human contact when human contact is wanted, even if one is in a room full of people. These days, the author writes, Americans aren’t good at being with others, and it doesn’t help that social media thrives on our loneliness, for which we turn to a world of virtual others for succor. Murthy’s approach is anecdotal, sometimes annoyingly so: Not every observation needs an “I was Joe’s anomie” story to back it, which blunts rather than sharpens the message. Still, the numbers are meaningful. As the author observes, there are more lonely or socially isolated people in America today than there are smokers, smoking having been a health problem that medicine and society banded together to do something about, never mind the tobacco lobbyists. Loneliness is more difficult to spot than a curl of smoke, and for that, Murthy offers some useful prescriptions, including teaching people “self-compassion,” which “is what shields us from—or at least softens the blow of—the judgment and ridicule of people who don’t understand us.” Other measures for young people, who bear much of the weight of the epidemic, include setting aside more family time and encouraging offline as well as online play.

A touch too pat at times but, overall, a well-considered diagnosis of a real and overlooked crisis in public health.

Kirkus Reviews