Too Close To The Flame


"Our world is aflame with sex," warns counselor and author Dr. Gregg Jantz. We live in a society where sex is practiced openly, talked about freely, engaged in creatively, and flaunted shamelessly. Cultural stigmas that once kept sex within definable boundaries have all but disappeared.

Anyone can fall prey to sexual temptation or become the target of a sexual aggressor. Any man or woman who has contact with the opposite sex — whether at church, in the workplace, or at play — ...

See more details below
Paperback (Original)
$15.87 price
(Save 11%)$17.95 List Price
Other sellers (Paperback)
  • All (22) from $1.99   
  • New (9) from $12.21   
  • Used (13) from $1.99   
Too Close to the Flame

Available on NOOK devices and apps  
  • NOOK Devices
  • Samsung Galaxy Tab 4 NOOK 7.0
  • Samsung Galaxy Tab 4 NOOK 10.1
  • NOOK HD Tablet
  • NOOK HD+ Tablet
  • NOOK eReaders
  • NOOK Color
  • NOOK Tablet
  • Tablet/Phone
  • NOOK for Windows 8 Tablet
  • NOOK for iOS
  • NOOK for Android
  • NOOK Kids for iPad
  • PC/Mac
  • NOOK for Windows 8
  • NOOK for PC
  • NOOK for Mac
  • NOOK for Web

Want a NOOK? Explore Now

NOOK Book (eBook)
$14.99 price


"Our world is aflame with sex," warns counselor and author Dr. Gregg Jantz. We live in a society where sex is practiced openly, talked about freely, engaged in creatively, and flaunted shamelessly. Cultural stigmas that once kept sex within definable boundaries have all but disappeared.

Anyone can fall prey to sexual temptation or become the target of a sexual aggressor. Any man or woman who has contact with the opposite sex — whether at church, in the workplace, or at play — needs the vital information contained in these pages.

Would you recognize a sexually charged relationship soon enough to avoid falling into an affair? Would you be able to help a friend, loved one, or someone you're counseling avoid such a relationship? Basing each section on gripping case studies, this must-read book for the new millennium will help you recognize the danger signs of a sexualized relationship and show you how to keep your future with your family, your friends, your coworkers, and your God secure.

In this informative volume, Dr. Jantz offers expert guidance in:

  • identifying sexual manipulators and climbers
  • spotting danger signals in friendships about to turn sexual
  • protecting family members from relatives or acquaintances who are sexual predators
  • knowing how to avoid sexual traps when advising church members
  • avoiding sexual pitfalls in professional and pastoral counseling
Read More Show Less

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781582293325
  • Publisher: Howard Books
  • Publication date: 4/1/2003
  • Edition description: Original
  • Pages: 250
  • Product dimensions: 6.00 (w) x 9.00 (h) x 0.70 (d)

Meet the Author

Dr. Gregory Jantz is a speaker, author, and counselor. In his own unique way, Gregg presents hope to a nation who has lost it. He is the founder and executive director of The Center for Counseling and Health Resources, Inc., a leading mental health and chemical dependency treatment facility. He is a nationally certified eating disorder specialist, a state certified psychologist, and a state-licensed mental health counselor. The Center was recently featured on the Dr. Phil show, serving as a counseling resource. He is married to his wife, LaFon, and has two sons.

Read More Show Less

Read an Excerpt


A Message for You

In a world filled with members of the opposite sex, your chances of coming into contact with them are pretty high. Men will be your fathers, brothers, coworkers, friends, and husbands. Women will be your mothers, sisters, coworkers, friends, and wives. This book is written to help you recognize and avoid potentially dangerous opposite-sex relationships.

Our only dependable basis for this discernment comes not from the culture, not from family traditions, and not from personal choices. Culture has a way of shifting its mores from era to era, swept along by the critical mass of current opinion. Family traditions have a way of perpetuating improper behavior, duplicating the sins of previous generations along with genetic material. Personal choices have a way of leading to unintended consequences, with feelings and desires ascendant and caution thrown to the wind.

In the midst of uncertainty like this, we have only one standard to go by — the one articulated by the creator of man and woman, by the author of male and female, by the originator of the very concept of sex, God himself. This book will use God's Word as the standard to accomplish several objectives. One is to help you recognize which sexual relationships are God-sanctioned and which are God-prohibited. Another goal is to give you the tools you need to recognize which relationships have a tendency toward sexualization and how to respond in case they do. This book will also help you recognize those individuals who may tend to sexualize relationships. You'll learn what to do if you encounter such a person. You'll also learn what to do if you are one.

The subject of our sexuality can be a controversial one. At times, the pages that follow will contain graphic descriptions vividly depicting the dilemmas posed by sexualized relationships. The reason for such explicitness is to ensure that sin be seen as sin and that it be stripped of any veil of secrecy or acceptability. Care has been used to be respectful of those who have been victims of inappropriately sexualized relationships; at the same time, this book will boldly confront those who sexualize relationships when they should not. This book arises from a knowledge of the severity of the problem and a sincere desire to provide hope and healing for all who read its pages.

Chapters 11 through 15 will deal specifically with situations that arise out of relationships between counselors or pastors and those they help. Spiritual and emotional advisors are particularly vulnerable to inappropriately sexualized relationships. During the past ten years, the front pages of newspapers and the lead stories on the evening news have heralded the infidelities of pastors and counselors for all to see.

If you are a counselor or pastor and have been in your profession for very long, you probably know at least one, perhaps more, of your colleagues who have engaged in inappropriate behavior with someone they were working with. You may even have succumbed to the temptation yourself.

"Strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees," the Scriptures admonish us. "Make level paths for your feet, so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed" (Hebrews 12:12-13). Our weakness can further cripple those who look to us for strength. We need to enhance our skills and hone our wisdom through studies like this one. If our failure causes someone else to fall, they are apt to take us down with them.

People and situations described in this book have been altered to protect privacy and identity. The stories are provided to illustrate our points, not to furnish specific details or clinical case studies.

"Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation," our Lord warned his men (Mark 14:38).

This book can help you to watch. It can increase your discernment, enhancing your relational eyesight so that you can see ahead of time the sexual risks that loom in your path.

By reading this book you are acknowledging the presence of One greater than yourself, who sees your relationships and desires for them to be pure and helpful to all concerned.

By reading this book you are acknowledging the reality that temptations will come and, if you're not careful, cause you to fall.

Read More Show Less

Table of Contents




A Message for You

Chapter 1

Recognize the Kindling of Current Culture

We Live Today in a Tinderbox

Chapter 2

Avoid Cultural Confusion

Rely on the Rock, Not on Shifting Sand

Chapter 3

Recognize the Power of Partnering

A Meeting of the Minds Can Lead to Trouble

Chapter 4

Avoid Adding Fuel to the Fire

Clear Boundaries in Close Relationships

Chapter 5

Recognize the Power of Position

Unbalanced Relationships Can Make Us Fall

Chapter 6

Avoid Abdicating Control

Keep Personal Boundaries Intact

Chapter 7

Recognize the Power of Family Ties

Love Within the Family Can Be Devastating

Chapter 8

Avoid Keeping the Secrets

Bring Your Family into Light

Chapter 9

Recognize the Power of Companionship

Friendships Can Lead to Inappropriate Intimacy

Chapter 10

Avoid the Transfer of Intimacy

Maintain Successful Friendships

Chapter 11

Recognize a Counseling Conflict

Compassion Can Lead to Passion

Chapter 12

Avoid the Smoldering Couch

Share Thoughts, Not Intimacy

Chapter 13

Recognize the Power of the Pulpit

Spiritual Heights Can Lead to Physical Falls

Chapter 14

Avoid a Church Burning

Use Spiritual Flame Retardant

Chapter 15


Embracing Life and Relationships Wisely

Read More Show Less

Customer Reviews

Be the first to write a review
( 0 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star


4 Star


3 Star


2 Star


1 Star


Your Rating:

Your Name: Create a Pen Name or

Barnes & Review Rules

Our reader reviews allow you to share your comments on titles you liked, or didn't, with others. By submitting an online review, you are representing to Barnes & that all information contained in your review is original and accurate in all respects, and that the submission of such content by you and the posting of such content by Barnes & does not and will not violate the rights of any third party. Please follow the rules below to help ensure that your review can be posted.

Reviews by Our Customers Under the Age of 13

We highly value and respect everyone's opinion concerning the titles we offer. However, we cannot allow persons under the age of 13 to have accounts at or to post customer reviews. Please see our Terms of Use for more details.

What to exclude from your review:

Please do not write about reviews, commentary, or information posted on the product page. If you see any errors in the information on the product page, please send us an email.

Reviews should not contain any of the following:

  • - HTML tags, profanity, obscenities, vulgarities, or comments that defame anyone
  • - Time-sensitive information such as tour dates, signings, lectures, etc.
  • - Single-word reviews. Other people will read your review to discover why you liked or didn't like the title. Be descriptive.
  • - Comments focusing on the author or that may ruin the ending for others
  • - Phone numbers, addresses, URLs
  • - Pricing and availability information or alternative ordering information
  • - Advertisements or commercial solicitation


  • - By submitting a review, you grant to Barnes & and its sublicensees the royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable right and license to use the review in accordance with the Barnes & Terms of Use.
  • - Barnes & reserves the right not to post any review -- particularly those that do not follow the terms and conditions of these Rules. Barnes & also reserves the right to remove any review at any time without notice.
  • - See Terms of Use for other conditions and disclaimers.
Search for Products You'd Like to Recommend

Recommend other products that relate to your review. Just search for them below and share!

Create a Pen Name

Your Pen Name is your unique identity on It will appear on the reviews you write and other website activities. Your Pen Name cannot be edited, changed or deleted once submitted.

Your Pen Name can be any combination of alphanumeric characters (plus - and _), and must be at least two characters long.

Continue Anonymously

    If you find inappropriate content, please report it to Barnes & Noble
    Why is this product inappropriate?
    Comments (optional)