Total Flirt: Tips, Tricks, and Techniques Every Girl Needs to Get the Guy [NOOK Book]

Read an Excerpt

The Eyes Have It
Your eyes meet from across the room. Girl, the game is on – you can relax because you're just getting warmed up, but locking gazes (even if for a second at a time) is the foundation for every spell you're about to cast. Eye contact is considered by relationship and dating experts to be the most effective tool for flirt success. When someone is being checked out, they instinctively know. And when instinct meets direct eye contact, your flirt target can actually experience a physical, erotic rush. Your eyes are your most remarkable weapons, able to unleash flirting abilities the world has never seen. Used properly, a careless glance can inflame the desires of every man, goldfish, houseplant and possibly inanimate objects in the room.
Eye contact will always be the center of your game. Every move you make hinges on what you do with your eyes. If you stare at the ground, no guy will think you are interested, or interesting. Anyone can look at someone—but someone special makes eye contact.
If making eye contact seems daunting, try a few exercises and learn a few cheaters that'll make you comfortable with looking directly at the man (or men) you're hot for. Pay attention to what you look at next time you walk through the office, a café, or the parking lot on the way to your car. Notice where your eyes naturally roam, whether you look at the ground, the sky, or if you skip your eyes around to look at objects. In particular, how are you looking at people—are you looking at legs, feet, hands, or faces? Practice focusing your gaze directly level, at about the point people's faces would be. When you feel good about it, glance at an attractive man's face for a moment, and then back in front of you. You did it—now do it a few more times until you get the hang of it.
Your next lesson in eye contact for the shy is to practice on a real-life sexy guy, in a conversation. You don’t need to stare raptly into his eyes until your eyes dry out and your eyelids twitch, and you start to see little fuzzy things out of the corners of your eyes. Instead, allow your eyes to travel around his face slowly, like a second hand sweeping around a clock from noon to midnight. Rest on his eyes, and begin again. Do this whenever you feel nervous about looking into his eyes for too long, and soon you'll be captivating him with your confident gaze before you even realize it.
But wait, there's more. Eye contact is a finely honed technique for mesmerizing hotties, and you're going to learn to wield it like Xena's sword, or Buffy's stake. Try an experiment in eye contact, and think of it as exercise – like eye contact with intent is a muscle you're learning to make stronger. Pick a day when you're feeling sassy and make eye contact with sexy, total strangers—at least two. Five in a day, then you're at the next level: making deliberate, eye contact with men you find attractive. Try it once, and you'll see how easy and fun it is—no one gets hurt, rejected, and there's no risk involved. Try it again and again, like rehearsals, and you'll be ready to rock harder than Joan Jett.

Looks That Thrill
You don’t have to be aggressive to reap the benefits from these eye contact flirt techniques—but being a bit brazen doesn't hurt. Think about the goal.

* When you have the beast in your sights, give your intended more than a glance. Let your eyes linger on his for a relaxed breath. Then decide if you want to keep contact for an intense across-the-room flirt, or move your eyes away to be a bit more playful in your approach.
* If he's playing hard to get, or you want to make him pay more attention, draw attention to your eyes by touching the corner of your eye as an adjustment, slightly touching the hair around your forehead, adjusting your glasses or touching a pen to your temple.
* Make eye contact, and then break it to look at his lips, and then back again. Smile. This can be repeated with success throughout conversations.
* Truly bad girls will make eye contact, slide their eyes down the front of his body, and then back up. Extra brazen points for lingering on the chest or hips.
* Of course, maintaining eye contact when you need to blink is very sexy, and lets him know you don’t want to miss a minute of his time.

Smile Sorcery
The easiest way to disarm, relax and intrigue any man is with a smile. It sounds simple and corny, but when you're flirting, a smile dancing on your lips is an instant relaxer, and makes guys curious about what you’re smiling about. A smile gives the unconscious impression that you have a great sense of humor, are approachable and that being around you is safe and indicative of a good time. Yes, a smile says all that without words. And even a light smile while talking can make you appear that much more inviting.
Next time you people-watch, look around at how everyone is holding their mouths, and how it speaks volumes about your impression of them. Someone with tight unsmiling lips seems stressed, unfriendly. Another person might have a frown, or be posing with a serious mean look—no smile here, just unapproachable people. Find people in the crowd who are smiling, laughing, or have just the tiniest hint of a smile playing around the corners of their mouths. See how they look more attractive, friendly, and like someone you might ask for directions from if you were lost? We instinctively feel good around people who are smiling—and that's just how you'll want any potential flirt-targets to feel when they look at you: good, at ease, relaxed and warm toward you.
A smile does indeed weave a spell around you. But you don’t need to look like Mommie Dearest walking through the subway or standing at the snack table. No, a maniacal smile will send the opposite message, unless you are laughing and smiling like a loon for a reason. You just need the tiniest smile at the corners of your mouth to look sexy, happy and open. Keep your lips closed, and gently curve the edges up in a half-smile, and this is the sexy smile you'll use when you make an entrance, stroll sexily across a room, gaze at paintings, survey the last of the snack table's cheese in a can, or anything else you happen to be doing.
Our lips are one of the most suggestive, sensual erogenous zones we've got—and right on our faces. When a boy is interested in you, he'll look at your lips almost as much as your eyes. You can slyly direct him to look at your lips to subliminally suggest sex throughout your entire communication with him, no matter if you're talking or not. Knowing that your lips look supple and shiny (see chapter 1), you can play around with what touches your lips, how they are touched and what goes in and out of them. Bite