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Trading Places Workbook for Men: The Best Move You'll Ever Make in Your Marriage


Stop stepping on her toes and learn how to dance.

Have you been spending a lot of time stepping on your wife’s toes? Maybe it’s time you put yourself in her shoes.

Trading Places: The Best Move You’ll Ever Make in Your Marriage is part of the key to winning much, much more from your relationship with your wife—more understanding, more laughter, and yes, more loving. Using this workbook as you read Trading ...

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Stop stepping on her toes and learn how to dance.

Have you been spending a lot of time stepping on your wife’s toes? Maybe it’s time you put yourself in her shoes.

Trading Places: The Best Move You’ll Ever Make in Your Marriage is part of the key to winning much, much more from your relationship with your wife—more understanding, more laughter, and yes, more loving. Using this workbook as you read Trading Places will help make sure you get it right.

Bestselling authors Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott wrote this workbook to help you make the most of the little-known secrets of putting the time-tested strategy of trading places to work in your marriage. Packed with practical helps and tips you’ve never thought of, you’ll learn the simple, three-step-strategy to trading places and, as a result, you’re sure to:
• Increase your levels of passion
• Bolster your commitment
• Eliminate nagging
• Short-circuit conflict
• Double your laughter
• Forgive more quickly
• Talk more intimately
Use the workbook to drill down through the three crucial steps to trading places—you’ll find self-tests, journals, even exercises to do together with your wife. Specific suggestions for practicing empathy make learning easier—and it’s all tied to the book.

When you’re done you’ll be prepared to experience “the intimate dance of trading places”. And you’ll have learned a skill that will make your marriage more rewarding—and more exciting—than you ever thought possible.

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What People Are Saying

From the Publisher
“Looking at the world through the eyes of your spouse will be a lot easier when you read Trading Places. Les and Leslie make empathy not only understandable, but attainable. I highly recommend this book.” — Gary D. Chapman, Ph.D., , Author

'This is a great book! Believe me, you’ll never look at your spouse the same way again. Les and Leslie, as usual, are grounded, easy to read, and immensely practical. Read Trading Places, and don’t go another day without walking in your spouse’s shoes.' — Dr. Kevin Leman, , Author

'Trading Places offers a ticket to vastly improved marital intimacy, and is well worth the price of admission. The Parrotts' trademark use of fascinating and ground-breaking research provides unusual depth and substance. To top it all off, it's a delightful read as well.' — Gary L. Thomas, , Author

Les and Leslie Parrott are nothing short of inspirational. Practical and challenging, Trading Places reminded me of “the secret” of marital happiness and success. A regular dose of the Parrott’s writing has done wonders for me personally and for my marriage. — Jim Burns, Ph.D., , Author

I've seen first hand Les and Leslie’s world-class marriage. We all want a lively, vital, stimulating, and enjoyable marriage like theirs, and you'll be well on your way after the 120 minutes it takes you to read this book. Nearly every page is as entertaining as an Everybody Loves Raymond episode. When you and the love of your life put the book down, I guarantee that both of you will know you just spent time with two of the happiest married people in the world, who both just happen to be two of North America's top experts in psychology and marriage counseling. — Neil Clark Warren, , Founder

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780310284789
  • Publisher: Zondervan
  • Publication date: 4/1/2008
  • Edition description: Workbook
  • Pages: 80
  • Sales rank: 1,151,230
  • Product dimensions: 5.90 (w) x 8.80 (h) x 0.30 (d)

Meet the Author

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott are founders of Real and the Center for Relationship Development at Seattle Pacific University. Their bestselling books include Love Talk, Crazy Good Sex, and the award-winning Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts. Their work has been featured in the New York Times and USA Today, and they have appeared on CNN, Good Morning America, and Oprah. They live with their two young sons in Seattle.
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Read an Excerpt

Trading Places Workbook for Men
The Best Move You'll Ever Make in Your Marriage

By Les Parrott Leslie Parrott Zondervan
Copyright © 2008
The Foundation for Healthy Relationships
All right reserved.

ISBN: 978-0-310-28478-9

Chapter One Exploring Your Own Social Style

Accurately identifying your social style is essential to trading places. We've developed an online assessment, the Trading Places Inventory, for helping you do just that. The exercise here centers on this assessment. We're providing you with a paper-pencil version of the assessment in this workbook just in case you don't have access to a computer. This will require you to tabulate your scores yourself, and it won't provide the instant graphic depiction of your social style, but it still does the job.

If you have already taken the assessment, skip to the bottom of this exercise for some additional suggestions.

The Trading Places Inventory

Below are a number of pairs of personal characteristics or traits. For each pair, choose the trait that describes you more than it describes your partner. Mark A if you are more "imaginative," or B if you value being "rational" when compared to your partner. Some of the traits will appear twice, but always in combination with a different trait. There are no right or wrong answers. Please be honest.

I Am More ...

1. a imaginative b rational 2. a helpful b quick-witted 3. a neat b sympathetic 4. a level-headed b efficient 5. a intelligent b considerate 6. a self-reliant b ambitious 7. a respectful b original 8. a creative b sensible 9. a generous b individualistic 10. a responsible b original 11. a capable b tolerant 12. a trustworthy b wise 13. a neat b logical 14. a forgiving b gentle 15. a efficient b respectful 16. a alert b cooperative 17. a imaginative b helpful 18. a realistic b moral 19. a considerate b wise 20. a sympathetic b individualistic 21. a ambitious b patient

Now take a moment to score the first part of this questionnaire. Give yourself a point for each answer that matches the following key. Note that items 1, 4, 6, 8, 10, and 13 are "buffer" items and are not used in the scoring.

2. a ________ 3. b ________ 5. b ________ 7. a ________ 9. a ________ 11. b ________ 12. a ________ 14. a ________ 15. b ________ 16. b ________ 17. a ________ 18. b ________ 19. a ________ 20. a ________ 21. b ________ TOTAL: _________________

Now answer the following questions by circling a number beside each of the items below.

Rarely or A little Some of A good Most or none of of the the time part of all of the time time the time the time

1. When my partner and I have a disagreement, I win. 1 2 3 4 5 2. I'm more hard-driving than my partner. 1 2 3 4 5 3. I'm very good at solving problems for my partner. 1 2 3 4 5 4. Compared to my partner, I keep my feelings in check. _ _ _ _ _ 1 2 3 4 5 5. I'm good at accurately analyzing a situation or issue in our marriage. 1 2 3 4 5


Excerpted from Trading Places Workbook for Men by Les Parrott Leslie Parrott Copyright © 2008 by The Foundation for Healthy Relationships. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
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Table of Contents

Contents A Letter from Les....................7
EXERCISES 1. Exploring Your Own Social Style....................11
2. Getting What You Want....................21
3. Knowing What You Feel....................27
4. Checking Your Ego at the Door....................35
5. Reading Your Partner Like a Book....................43
6. Improving Your Care IQ....................53
7. Maximizing the eHarmony Marriage Program....................65
8. Getting Your Partner to See through Your Eyes....................71
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