True Secrets of Lesbian Desire: Keeping Sex Alive in Long-term Relationships

Overview

Renate Stendhal sweeps out the old myths about bed death, the notion that lesbian couples tend to be too close to maintain sexual desire. Her own story and her talks with counseling clients prove the contrary. Stendhal shows that sex is the natural and continuous outcome of a closeness generated by bold honesty and the capacity to speak and hear intimate secrets. Sharing "shameful" desires and vulnerable fears is what love and sexual passion are made of.

Stendhal teaches ...

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True Secrets of Lesbian Desire: Keeping Sex Alive in Long-Term Relationships

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Overview

Renate Stendhal sweeps out the old myths about bed death, the notion that lesbian couples tend to be too close to maintain sexual desire. Her own story and her talks with counseling clients prove the contrary. Stendhal shows that sex is the natural and continuous outcome of a closeness generated by bold honesty and the capacity to speak and hear intimate secrets. Sharing "shameful" desires and vulnerable fears is what love and sexual passion are made of.

Stendhal teaches simple, effective and thought-provoking lessons for any committed or married couple who wants to keep passion alive beyond the honeymoon phase. Her message: The art of intimate truth-telling is the most effective aphrodisiac of all.

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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
"Renate Stendhal's unique words of wisdom are wonderful, and have an important message for everyone."
—Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon, co-authors of Lesbian/Woman

"Tracking all these mutual quests for honest relationships, Stendhal's small and beautiful volume almost made me wish to be in one myself. I'll keep it handy, should the occasion arise."
—Alix Dobkin, singer/songwriter

"What a compassionate and useful little book, so full of heart and good sense. Renate Stendhal brings her work deep understanding about intimacy that will benefit any couple ready to take the next step in love and passion."
—Carol Queen, Ph.D., author of Exhibitionism for the Sky

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781556434754
  • Publisher: North Atlantic Books
  • Publication date: 10/20/2003
  • Edition description: Reprint
  • Pages: 120
  • Sales rank: 886,051
  • Product dimensions: 5.55 (w) x 7.51 (h) x 0.43 (d)

Meet the Author

Renate Stendhal is a coach and counselor for individuals and couples, with a private practice in Berkeley and San Francisco. She has published several books, including Sex and Other Sacred Games and the award-winning photobiography, Gertrude Stein in Words and Pictures.

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Table of Contents

Foreword ix
Preface to the Second Edition xi
I. A Woman Appeared 1
An Approach 1
"Whence Speakest Thou?" 4
Entering 9
Unspeakable Depth 12
II. The Thirty-Six Colors of Erotic Desire 18
Getting Down to It 18
Birds of a Feather 20
On Dangerous Ground 23
"Sex Is Magic" 26
I'd Rather Die than Tell Her 29
A Possibility 32
Clues from Childhood 35
The Coolest Game 39
Now What? 43
Back to Square One 47
The Helpmate 51
Polymorphously Perverse 55
Intimate Passion 66
III. Truth as Aphrodisiac 70
IV. True Confessions 79
The Icing on the Cake 79
Explorer in an Unknown Land 89
Why Have Sex? 93
"Mature Sex" 101
Selena's Secret 107
Unshaming the Body 110
An Erotic Practice 115
Books Mentioned in the Text 119
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