Tweet This Book: The 1,400 Greatest Quotes of All Time in 140 Characters or Less

Tweet This Book: The 1,400 Greatest Quotes of All Time in 140 Characters or Less

by Sayre Van Young, Marin Van Young
     
 

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THE TWITTER ANSWER TO YOUR FAVORITE QUOTATION DICTIONARY, WITH TWEETABLE-LENGTH QUOTES THAT ARE CLEVER, COOL, SMART, TOUCHING, WISE, FUNNY, AND MORE

Brevity may be the soul of wit, but 140 characters is the absolute limit on Twitter! Luckily, Tweet This Book allows you to spice up their microblog with the greatest quotes of all time. Each one isSee more details below

Overview

THE TWITTER ANSWER TO YOUR FAVORITE QUOTATION DICTIONARY, WITH TWEETABLE-LENGTH QUOTES THAT ARE CLEVER, COOL, SMART, TOUCHING, WISE, FUNNY, AND MORE

Brevity may be the soul of wit, but 140 characters is the absolute limit on Twitter! Luckily, Tweet This Book allows you to spice up their microblog with the greatest quotes of all time. Each one is not only brief — it is officially tweetable. The quick, punchy quotes in this wonderfully diverse collection come from all circles and include literary greats; politicians like Abe Lincoln, Winston Churchill, and Barack Obama; and sports figures, musicians, and celebrities like Yogi Berra, Tupac Shakur, and Hunter S. Thompson. With an easy-to-use, A-to-Z organization by topic, you can quickly find the perfect quote for anything you want to tweet about.

“The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.”
—Julia Child

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
—Oscar Wilde

“Life is too short to blend in.”
—Paris Hilton

“Whatever you are, be a good one.”
—Abraham Lincoln

“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.”
—Billy Crystal

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Product Details

ISBN-13:
9781569759165
Publisher:
Ulysses Press
Publication date:
12/01/2010
Sold by:
Barnes & Noble
Format:
NOOK Book
Pages:
240
File size:
0 MB

Related Subjects

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Appearance, Personal
See also Clothes

Is that a beard, or are you eating a muskrat?
Dr. Gonzo

Some of the worst mistakes of my life have been haircuts.
Jim Morrison

There’s one thing about baldness. It’s neat.
Don Herold

I’m casual; you’re messy; she’s a slob.
Peg Bracken

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
Lily Tomlin

His hair is getting thin—still, who wants fat hair?
Milton Berle

When red-haired people are above a certain social grade, their hair is auburn.
Mark Twain

Why don’t you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
P. G. Wodehouse

Her hair has more body than I do.
Anonymous

It’s okay to be fat. So you’re fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.
Roseanne Barr


Arguments & Fighting

Fasten your seat belts. It’s going to be a bumpy night.
Bette Davis (in All About Eve)

He who slings mud generally loses ground.
Adlai Stevenson

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes.
Abigail Van Buren (aka Dear Abby)

When someone says they don’t mind, they mind.
African-American proverb


Clothes & Fashion

When in doubt, wear red.
Bill Blass

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on with a pitchfork.
Jonathan Swift

I base my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch.
Gilda Radner

You’d be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
Dolly Parton

Neckties strangle clear thinking.
Lin Yutang

You can be better dressed when you own a lot of stuff.
Helen Gurley Brown

You mean those clothes of hers are intentional?
Dorothy Parker

The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize.
Olympia Dukakis (in Steel Magnolias)

One-third of your life is spent in bed, two-thirds of your life in clothes.
E. L. Brentlinger

I say dress up every day; you never know when you’re going to meet your next husband.
Laura Bennett


Diets & Dieting
See also Food

[She thinks] you don’t get fat if no one sees you eating.
Gloria Naylor

Nothing in the world arouses more false hopes than the first four hours of a diet.
Anonymous

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks.
Totie Fields

[She’s] a light eater. As soon as it’s light, she starts eating.
Henny Youngman

“How long does getting thin take?” asked Pooh anxiously.
A. A. Milne

Never eat more than you can lift.
Miss Piggy

I’m not overweight. I’m just nine inches too short.
Shelley Winters

The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.
Julia Child

Please sir, I want some more.
Charles Dickens [Oliver Twist]


Dumb…Dumber…Dumbest

Except where noted, all these descriptions were created by the well-known and oft-quoted Anonymous.

You’re not too smart, are you? I like that in a man.
Kathleen Turner (in Body Heat)

Your ignorance cramps my conversation.
Anthony Hope

His mind is so open that the wind whistles through it.
Heywood Broun

He’s half a bubble off plumb.

She’s two bees short of a hive.

Sad…The good Lord only gave her first gear.

I can see the wheel spinning but the hamster’s dead.

Strong as an ox, with the brains of a tractor.
Edna Buchanan

He’s a taco short of a combination box.

Her intellect is rivaled only by garden tools.

She comes from a shallow gene pool.

Any dumber he’d be a begonia.
Molly Ivins

His tray table is not in its fully upright and locked position.

…dumber than a bag of hammers.

He’s as dumb as a salad bar.
Garrison Keillor

He’s not flying on all thrusters.
Mr. Spock (Leonard Nimoy)


Happiness

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
Rita Mae Brown

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
Oscar Wilde

A joy that’s shared is a joy made double.
John Ray

The door to happiness opens outward.
Kierkegaard

If you don’t enjoy what you already have, how could you be happier with more?
Anonymous

Happiness is a direction, not a place.
Anonymous

People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Abraham Lincoln


Jobs & Work

The trouble with work is it’s so daily.
Anonymous

Beware the barrenness of a busy life.
Socrates

I think that maybe in every company today there is always at least one person who is going crazy slowly.
Joseph Heller

Few great men could pass Personnel.
Paul Goodman

No man ever listened himself out of a job.
Calvin Coolidge

They say hard work never hurt anybody, but I figure why take the chance.
Ronald Reagan [also attributed to Charlie McCarthy/Edgar Bergen]

Beware of any enterprise that requires new clothes.
Henry David Thoreau

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.
Lily Tomlin

One of the signs of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.
Bertrand Russell

To be successful, the first thing to do is fall in love with your work.
Sister Mary Lauretta

To love what you do and feel that it matters—how could anything else be more fun?
Katharine Graham


Kids

The Good

A baby is God’s opinion that life should go on.
Carl Sandburg

Babies are such a nice way to start people.
Don Herold

The Bad

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.
Jerry Seinfeld

Having a baby is like getting the world’s worst roommate, like having Janis Joplin with a bad hangover and PMS come to stay.
Anne Lamott

Diaper backwards spells repaid. Think about it.
Marshall McLuhan

All children are essentially criminal.
Denis Diderot

Do not allow your children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth.
Attributed variously, including to Steve Allen and Fran Lebowitz

A child is a curly, dimpled lunatic.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

The thing about having a baby is that thereafter you have it.
Jean Kerr

Adolescents turn on you—that’s their job.
Ron Howard

Pregnancy

Don’t make a baby if you can’t be a father.
National Urban League slogan

Remodeling is a mental illness of late pregnancy.
Cathy Crimmins

Childbirth

Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
Carol Burnett

I don’t know nuthin’ ‘bout birthin’ no babies!
Butterfly McQueen (in Gone with the Wind)

Childhood

No one has a normal childhood.
Laura Chester

Everything else you grow out of, but you never recover from childhood.
Beryl Bainbridge

Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it.
Harold S. Hulbert

Who knows the thoughts of a child?
Nora Perry

They fuck you up, your mum and dad….
Philip Larkin

Parents & Parenthood

Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.
Benjamin Spock

You know that children are growing up when they start asking questions that have answers.
John J. Plomp

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare.
Ed Asner

The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent.
Anonymous

Let your children go if you want to keep them.
Malcolm Forbes

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you’ve given birth.
Erma Bombeck

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world, a mother’s love is not.
James Joyce

No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement.
Florida Scott-Maxwell


Relationships
See also Friends & Enemies; Marriage; etc.

You want monogamy, marry a swan.
Steven Hill (in Heartburn)

Men and women, women and men. It will never work.
Erica Jong

There is no way to take the danger out of human relationships.
Barbara Grizzuti Harrison

Why go out for hamburger when you have steak at home?
Paul Newman

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
Mae West

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