TwiLITE A Parody [NOOK Book]

Overview

This parody skewers the best-selling novel about the sparkly undead. Whether you're a "Twilight" lover or hater, you'll laugh out loud. Readers


have raved: "GOLD!" "I love Twilight. But I swear I think I almost love this even more." "This was hilarious!"


This is a true parody that follows its inspiration non-event by non-event. It stars Edward Sullen and Bella Swoon, and boy is she clumsy.

...
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TwiLITE A Parody

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NOOK Book (eBook)
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Overview

This parody skewers the best-selling novel about the sparkly undead. Whether you're a "Twilight" lover or hater, you'll laugh out loud. Readers


have raved: "GOLD!" "I love Twilight. But I swear I think I almost love this even more." "This was hilarious!"


This is a true parody that follows its inspiration non-event by non-event. It stars Edward Sullen and Bella Swoon, and boy is she clumsy.

Read More Show Less

Product Details

  • BN ID: 2940011429583
  • Publisher: Sue Knott
  • Publication date: 7/28/2011
  • Sold by: Smashwords
  • Format: eBook
  • Sales rank: 795,752
  • File size: 345 KB

Meet the Author

Sue Knott is the doting mother of a teen son and the long-suffering wife of an equally long-suffering (but much crankier) husband. She has also been “mom” to a bunny (now deceased) and an extremely energetic pooch.


She has had a varied and successful career as an advertising copywriter. She has lived in Pittsburgh, PA; NYC; LaCrosse, WI; Scranton, PA; and currently makes her home in upstate NY. Occasionally she tries her hand at stand-up comedy, though she is in complete and total terror whenever she takes the stage.


Ms. Knott knows she must do some wild and whacky things to promote her books and is totally dreading putting herself “out there” in the public eye. She asks everyone to please try to overlook her bulges and wrinkles. (Sun damage from the ‘70s…who knew?)


Sue is an avid gardener and wishes she had time to pursue craft projects (or even just to clean her house). She also desperately wishes for you to post reviews and tell all your friends about her book(s).


Sue Knott sincerely hopes that the author of the book that inspired her parody does not in any way take personal offense. Sue offers her lampooning with great admiration for the empire said author has built and with the affection she believes is due every human being. (Truth be told, Sue’s sarcastic wit is much sharper when wielded against her own husband and she hopes to stay in his good graces as well.)


Sue has a sweet tooth. She wears a size 9 shoe. She collects art glass. She recycles. She sewed her own wedding gown (big mistake). She revels in the outdoors and longs to be on the beach. She prattles on at the keyboard. She is a safety nutcase. And she loves to Zumba.


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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 24 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(14)

4 Star

(2)

3 Star

(2)

2 Star

(1)

1 Star

(5)

Your Rating:

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 24 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 12, 2012

    MaxRide10 aka best speller on Atraware word games

    WELL, I WOULD CONSIDER TELLING ABOUT THIS BOOK, BUT IT WOULD TAKE FOREVER SO.....
    READ THE STINKIN BOOK TO FIND OUT!

    4 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 20, 2012

    Kinda iroinic how bad this was.

    Well lets just get a few things straight.
    1. This book wasn't very funny at all. It never really had any laugh out loud moments. There were lots of parts in the real books that were left out that totally could have been made fun of!!!
    2. The writing just wasnt great. It was like stupid writing. Like "I'm bela and im stupid, pale, funny, and clumsy!" Instead I think the writer could have taken a better aproach to being "funny."
    3. Its a bad purchause it isnt funny what so ever honestly save your money and your gigabite space on you nook.

    4 out of 10 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted February 8, 2013

    This book was absolutely excellent. I recommend it to all, regar

    This book was absolutely excellent. I recommend it to all, regardless of how they feel about the Twilight series. Unfortuneatly it was a little short.

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 4, 2012

    123

    Great book

    3 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 18, 2012

    Haters

    Its an awesome book, and its so obvious the haters r just twilight lovers

    3 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 30, 2012

    Childish?

    Its a great book. I mean who doesnt hate twilite(yes i know i spelled it wrong).

    3 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 3, 2011

    Short, but hysterical

    Why listen to my opinion when you can read a nice, long preview online at scribd or amazon to see how you like it?

    3 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted August 30, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    Awful, not funny, childish

    Don't bother

    3 out of 9 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 16, 2013

    XY

    Woha

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 6, 2013

    No

    Edward sullen and bella swoon really

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2014

    Tobkits tht need rping

    Ill be emberkit

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2014

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 23, 2014

    Kits who need rping

    POST IN SECOND RES ON SHO U WANT TO RP! All the kits have black fur because both parents have black fur! Emberkit- a green eyed shecat who will be an apprentice very soon! Ashkit- Emberkits brother, with grey eyes. THE FOLLOWING KITS WILL BE BORN TOMORROW! Blackkit- blue eyed tom. Greykit- grey eyed tom. Skykit- blue eyed she. Parents- Blackfeather and Blacknight

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted January 1, 2014

    Bed

    Bed

    0 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 16, 2013

    Vynx

    Ooh.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 15, 2013

    Dark Macic 1 by Broken

    Twilights horn glowed as she turned thd page of an ancient book. Dark spells lay on every page, tempting the unicorn. Everypony told her not to read it. They told her it was bad news. But Twilight had already begun. There was no stopping the darkness from infiltrating her. Now all Twilighg had to do was use one of the spells. One of the spells caught her attention. It was a spell to make dark crystals grow out of the ground. Thinking that sounded harmless, Twilight cast it. A small, black crystal sprouted out of the library floor. Suddenly, shadows spilled from the book and wrapped themselves around the mare. They seeped into her body, corrupting her. Twilights eyes turned red, along with the pink stripes in her mabe and tail. Her Element of Harmony, which was sitting on the other side of the room, turned black and crackled with dark magic. Spike ran downstairs and gasped. "Twilight, what happ-" but he couldnt finish his sentence, for Twilight had blasted him to the ground. "I am no longer Twilight Sparkle." The mare growled, standing over him. "I am Twilight Shadow! And nothing can stop me from ruling all of Equestria!" Spike tried getting up, but the evil unicorn pinned him down. She raised her hoof abd punched him in the face. Blood dribbled out of Spikes mouth as Twilight Shadow beat him till he was out cold. Then she took the form of purple smoke, like Nightmare Moon had. Who was next?

    0 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 15, 2013

    Icetear

    Two things: 1Good keep writing 2what the fu_ck they must of really currupted her to make do that

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted December 30, 2012

    i want to read this i bet its good

    Im a twilight lover and i think its funny wen people make parodies for books!

    0 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 24, 2012

    Chidish

    Is it really childish.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 13, 2012

    To the book worm

    Parodys SUCK. Ur wrong they insult the book. When i become an author, yah thats right, i font want my book made into a parody. It makes u feel sad that people hate ur book that much.Twlight4ever- Zafrina

    0 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 24 Customer Reviews

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