Undressed to Kill: The Investigations of Ralphy

Undressed to Kill: The Investigations of Ralphy

4.2 9
by David Andrew McGlone

To Ralphy everything in life was a mystery, including life itself. He made it his business to survey the aspects of everyday life, that were beyond the scope of others and often Ralphy himself. A thinker and a lover, a tough guy and a philosopher; he aspired to be all of these and none. Ralphy was the city's first, and only, existential Private Eye.Short in both


To Ralphy everything in life was a mystery, including life itself. He made it his business to survey the aspects of everyday life, that were beyond the scope of others and often Ralphy himself. A thinker and a lover, a tough guy and a philosopher; he aspired to be all of these and none. Ralphy was the city's first, and only, existential Private Eye.Short in both height and intellect, Ralphy nevertheless embraces the absurdity of his position, staring at life through the bottom of a glass. Aided and abetted by his lethal and gorgeous secretary-cum-partner Rachel, Ralphy takes on, and solves, the strangest of cases. The High-Brow Detective Agency is established in a town that seethes with danger and sex; a place awash in alcohol and sin.Take a blackmailed husband and a little-bo-peep impersonator, then mix in an adulterous car salesman and his circus-folk kin. Add a death via the medium of chambermaid, toad loving revengers, a lethal meeting with a true femme fatale and a time-out for analysis; shake well and taste the world of Ralphy. A heady cocktail of the surreal and bizarre, this is Undressed to Kill

Product Details

CreateSpace Publishing
Publication date:
Product dimensions:
6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.51(d)

Meet the Author

A writer across many different styles and genres, David McGlone strives to provide a distinctive voice. Be it the absurdity of the Ralphy stories or the cryptic messages within Nocturns, he always tries to entertain.

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Undressed to Kill: The Investigations of Ralphy 4.2 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 9 reviews.
tiffanydavis2 More than 1 year ago
Undressed to Kill: The Investigations of Ralphy, by David McGlone, is a collection of 6 short stories that follow Ralphy, a private investigator, while he solves various crimes. While Ralphy investigates cases and gets himself into trouble, his secretary Rachel, and Lawyer Johnny "the Hawk" Mason usually have to follow him around and save him. Ralphy's character is slightly rough around the edges. He loves to drink, enjoys women, and can't seem to keep himself out of trouble. In every scenario, Ralphy is either drunk, getting laid, or being beaten up. You can't help but love his character. McGlone does an amazing job and grabbing your interest from the start and will have you laughing through the very end. His writing style is witty and makes for an easy read. My only complaint would be that McGlone find a better editor. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone who could use a good laugh, and I look forward to reading more by this author.
Mariv More than 1 year ago
David Andrew McGlone’s book “Undressed to Kill: The Investigations of Ralphy” is a short collection of 6 easygoing stories about private investigator Ralphy and his way of solving cases in his High Brow Detective Agency. It was a great pleasure and joy reading this collection of “detective” stories. Ralphy’s way of solving crimes by seeking his next drink and his next woman sometimes ends with beating, and sometimes with escape which “has always been Ralphys favorite form of defence”. In his facing down with criminals like the Martegna boys, Little Bo Peep, mob boss Lucerne he usually get saved by his secretary Rachel, and his lawyer friend Johnny “the Hawk” Mason, because Ralphy is quite "vertically challenged". Interesting quote that describes his investigation skills “If brains were dynamite, Ralphy wouldn’t have enough to blow his hat off”. Authors writing style is quite narrative and it will be much interesting to follow events based on dialogue then narration. All the plots flow nicely, with right speed and length, keeping the reader guessing the outcome to the very end. At the end of this book I wasn't sure did I finished comedy book with splashes of detective elements, or detective book with splashes of comedy. In either way, it was a good reading material. If you are seeking for a short detective book, looking for some crime solving but mainly getting laughter, and fun you should give a try for this book.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
What a book! I loved the Naked Gun style humour here and the style of writing. Ralphy - and all of his friends - are a breath of fresh air if you want to lose yourself for a while and just laugh. More Ralphy please.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Francine1440 More than 1 year ago
Undressed To Kill: The Investigations of Ralphy, written by David Andrew McGlone, is a short collection of stories about the cases of an alcohol addicted and fairly useless private investigator. Ralphy is pretty much a low life who spends his days and nights looking for his next drink and his next woman. He has a two-track mind: getting drunk and getting laid. That’s probably why the cases he does get aren’t exactly cream of the crop but he does seem to always come out on top, albeit usually with a little help from friends. The book starts with a nice little introduction that gives a bit of a background about Ralphy and his personal life as well as his work. It also introduces Rachel, Ralphy’s assistant, who alternates between sleeping with him and saving his behind when need be. Rachel is by far my favorite character in the collection. There was no way I could like Ralphy who is a complete waste of skin but that’s the way he is written and meant to be. Think back to the hard-boiled detective novels from the sixties and seventies and that’s what these case stories seem a lot like. There are six short stories in all and for the most part all are quite entertaining and somewhat funny. I could picture Ralphy starring in a half hour television show about his cases. Each story is written in a format perfect for just that set-up. The solution to the cases isn’t always obvious and the author does a good job of providing enough suspense to keep things entertaining. My favorite case out of the six in the book was Ralph Gets Lucky. A fast little tale about blackmail and intimidation with an ending that proves maybe Ralphy isn’t quite the idiot he consistently portrays himself to be. For those that miss the days of Hawaii Five O and Rockford Files, Undressed To Kill is a nice throwback to that era with maybe a bit more sex.
MarthaM More than 1 year ago
Undressed to Kill The Investigations of Ralphy David Andrew McGlone I almost died laughing reading Undressed to Kill. This is a collection of stories from the files of the High Brow Detective Agency owned by a private eye named Ralphy. Parodying the great hard boiled investigators like Sam Spade from the Maltese Falcon, Ralphy is equipped with the two room office, the gorgeous secretary, a nose for trouble and a distinct like of a good drink. Unfortunately, Ralphy couldn't investigate his way out of a paper bag without the help of his motley crew of contacts like his secretary, Rachel, his old lawyer friend, Johnny 'the hawk' Mason, Sgt. Kelly. As he faces down criminals like Little Bo Peep, mob boss Mario Lucerne, the Martegna boys, Ralphy muses about Kierkegaard and Sartre and is usually totally oblivious of the crimes, deals and machinations that are going on around him. Ralphy is usually drunk, being beaten up, getting laid by a femme fatal or recovering from a bender but how could we help but love this noir detective who can synopsize War and Punishment on the same page that he skewers or screws up Shakespeare right before his trial in front of Justice Dezerts. McGlone is an absolutely brilliant writer though he does have a little problem with punctuation. Lots of people can edit but this type of amazing parody is rare and thrilling to encounter.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Undressed to Kill is a collection of six short stories based on Ralphy and his High Brow Detective Agency. His assistant/secretary at the agency is Rachel and without her, he would be in a lot of trouble most of the time. Ralphy is not too bright, but his constant state of being hung over from his drinking of the night before does not help his brain power. For example, he marries his wife, Mizzi, after knowing her for an hour. Of course, Mizzi’s marrying him doesn’t say a lot for her either. Ralphy seems to stumble through life but everything works out for him in the end. The author does a great job of making Ralphy come alive and you are soon cheering him on in his endeavors. The short story titles, such as “Flogging a Dead Horse”, grab your attention and make you want to read every story. All the plots flow nicely and hold your interest, keeping you guessing the outcome to the very end. I particularly loved the author’s name choices for his characters such as Justice Dezerts and Kid ‘U’ Knott. They had me laughing out loud. One of the things that impressed me was that the editing was well-done. This is a very enjoyable book that anyone would enjoy reading. Give it a try!
Asand More than 1 year ago
This book is funny, in that Leslie Nelson and the Naked Gun movie sorta way. It is that literal humor(not sure if that is a true term) and plenty of sexual innuendos to last me for the rest of my life. Reading this book about our not so smart private eye, Ralphy, made me think of many Mel Brooks' films. It is the kind of humor that is sometimes past the point of being funny and is just plain silly. Sometimes, I found myself rolling my eyes at some of the attempts at humor; but there are some parts that really are laugh out loud funny. I still do not understand how Ralphy gets the "girl" so to speak, in as many ways, as he does. I guess he is good at other things, besides being smart. There are a few constants throughout these short stories: Ralphy is usually drunk or on his way there, Ralphy is usually getting ready to sleep with one lucky(or unlucky?) lady, and Ralphy has to rely on his friends to help him solve the cases. But the cases are pretty insane which helps add to the comedy. All in all, it is a funny read and will give you something to laugh at, especially if you think your luck is not so great; just remember, it could always be worse. You could be like Ralphy. I have to give this 3 stars.
Janet16 More than 1 year ago
This is a short book with a bunch of short stories that center on Ralphy and his detective business. Immediately this book reminded me of the old Film Noir of the 1940s and 1950s and of The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy. I found the stories entertaining and easy to read, though Ralphy is rather dumb most of the time and it’s his friends who solve the cases, not him. The tangents in the stories were funny and help break up the pace. There were times when I got confused as the author went off to explain something that wasn’t directly related to the story. But, after pausing and re-reading those parts I managed to get back on track. I enjoyed this book and would recommend. I especially like the part where Ralphy goes to a psychiatrist; it kind of reminded me of Madea meeting with Dr. Phil in Madea Goes To Jail. My only complaint is that it was mostly written in passive voice and there wasn’t much dialogue between the characters. But this was easily overlooked since the rest of the stories keep you interested and laughing.