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A funny thing happened to me once on my way home from vacation. I pulled into my driveway after a long, long drive with a carload of annoying children and a snarly wife...not my current one, I hasten to note...and pulled myself painfully out of the pilot's seat of our van. Mostly just to stretch a bit and catch a moment away from this moment of familial bonding, I limped around the house to the front to see if any mail or messages had found their way to our door. A yellow, official looking form was taped to our front door. Hmmm... I took it down and read it. I read it again. I shook my head to clear my eyes, and I read it yet again.
No, I was not mistaken. Yes, I had read the notice correctly: My lawn had been condemned. The yellow form on my door said I had six days to remove all "worthless vegetation" from my yard or the city of Lincoln, Nebraska, would do it for me. And charge me for the favor. The notice was clearly official, and it was signed by the City of Lincoln Weed Inspector and Grand Inquisitor. Worthless vegetation, he said... I looked around my suburban yard. What on earth could he mean by "worthless vegetation?" I saw daylilies, lambs quarter, dandelions, oxalis, shepherd's purse, nut grass...all edible...all in constant use in our kitchen...nope...nothing worthless there.