What Are You Waiting For?: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex [NOOK Book]

Overview

If you need satisfying answers to your questions about sex, Dannah Gresh has one (surprising) word for you.
 
In What Are You Waiting For? Dannah follows the trail of one provocative, ancient word through the Bible to discover God’s deepest thoughts about sex. The mind-blowing truth she uncovers ...
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What Are You Waiting For?: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex

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Overview

If you need satisfying answers to your questions about sex, Dannah Gresh has one (surprising) word for you.
 
In What Are You Waiting For? Dannah follows the trail of one provocative, ancient word through the Bible to discover God’s deepest thoughts about sex. The mind-blowing truth she uncovers clearly points the way to a sexuality that’s satisfying and real and everything God designed it to be. 
 
(Not one to shy away from edgy topics), Dannah candidly shares…

- straight talk about masturbation and pornography
- the ground-breaking science that explains the addictive power of romantic experiences
- honest answers about the lesbian question
- a clear plan for breaking free from sexual guilt
- the unexpected key to a lifetime of truly fulfilling intimacy

If you’re a young woman looking for honest answers about sex—and wondering why it’s such a big deal to God—you’ve come to the right place. In these pages you’ll discover a life-changing truth that no one ever talks about—a truth that will transform everything you think you know about sex, romance, and God.
 
So what are you waiting for? The answer is right inside.




From the Trade Paperback edition.
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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher
Praise for What Are You Waiting For?

“Dannah Gresh has hit on a simple yet undiscovered truth that puts seemingly random questions of sexuality in context. I love the way Dannah doesn’t shy away from or water down the tough issues, yet she never compromises God’s best for you! This is a must-read for any single Christian woman.”
—Dr. Juli Slattery, clinical psychologist, Focus on the Family, and author of No More Headaches

“Dannah Gresh has totally nailed it with this pertinent and hugely needed book. Written honestly and compellingly, this is a must-read for all teenage girls—wait, this is a must-read for everyone, especially teenage guys! I am so grateful for this important resource and plan to recommend it to all my young adult readers.”
—Melody Carlson, author of Diary of a Teenage Girl series and the TrueColor series

“Dannah Gresh hits another home run! What Are You Waiting For? is refreshingly real and relevant—definitely a timely message for today’s generation of young women!”
—Shannon Ethridge, international speaker and best-selling author of Every Young Woman’s Battle

“This is hands-down the best book about sexual fidelity I have ever read—informative, entertaining, and very inspiring. Dannah Gresh tackles the trickiest of topics with astonishing grace. Her explanation of the sacred power of sex is unblushing and revelatory. I know this is a book for girls, but every Christian guy should read it too. I’m already reading it for the second time.”
—Nate Larkin, founder of the Samson Society and author of Samson and the Pirate Monks: Calling Men to Authentic Brotherhood

“If you are looking for the gospel truth on the very real issue of sex and sexuality that all singles face, this is the book for you. Dannah Gresh talks to singles where they really live. Not only is it refreshing, it is liberating—as truth always is. Dannah does not dance around the issues but addresses them with in-your-face clarity that is sorely needed. Sharing the spiritual implications while balancing the reality of the natural world we live in, Dannah practically addresses how singles can be victorious in the battle between the flesh and the spirit.”
—Michelle McKinney Hammond, author of What Women Don’t Know and Men Don’t Tell You

“All I can say is wow! My assistant’s teenage daughter agreed to flip through this book for me as a favor and ended up absorbed in the entire thing! As she rightly put it, What Are You Waiting For? brings ‘amazing insight into what no one tells you about sex—and it really can strengthen the relationship you have with God and your future spouse.’ This book is a fantastic read. Dannah Gresh has such a special way of taking an important subject and making it appealing, practical, and accessible to everyone.”
—Shaunti Feldhahn, best-selling author of For Women Only and For Young Women Only

“In an age where sex is perverted and belittled—when it appears to be a tool in the hands of the Enemy rather than the God who created it—Dannah has shown us God’s pure intention for sexuality. Through an in-depth study of Scripture and confirmation in life experiences, she highlights the honest-to-goodness biblical truth behind one of life’s most precious and beautiful mysteries. Women young and old will read this book and find the inspiration and tools they need to treat God’s gift of sexuality with the respect and protection it deserves.”
—Julie Hiramine, founder of Generations of Virtue and author of Beautifully Made

What Are You Waiting For? is a well-written study of the sexual culture our teens are immersed in today and offers a culturally relevant perspective that aligns itself with the Word of God. Dannah has managed to walk the fine line of approaching this difficult subject in a way that will inspire teens to live holy lives and inspire parents to broach this delicate topic with their kids. This book is not for the faint of heart; however, neither is raising teenagers in our current society.”
—Ron Luce, founder and president of Teen Mania Ministries

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781601423320
  • Publisher: The Crown Publishing Group
  • Publication date: 1/18/2011
  • Sold by: Random House
  • Format: eBook
  • Pages: 112
  • Sales rank: 567,389
  • File size: 868 KB

Meet the Author

DANNAH GRESH is the best-selling author of several books, including And the Bride Wore White and Lies Young Women Believe (coauthored with Nancy Leigh DeMoss). With a passion for speaking to teens and young adults about purity, Dannah is a frequent contributor to FamilyLife Today and Midday Connection and a recommended spokesperson on modesty by Focus on the Family. Dannah lives in Pennsylvania with her husband, Bob, and their three children.


From the Trade Paperback edition.
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Read an Excerpt

Chapter 1: let’s get real

This book is not for spiritual monks.
   If you spend more of your time at church getting to know God’s Word than out in the world living it, you probably won’t like this book. It’s raw and real. If you can’t handle words like masturbation, orgasm, and porn, you should just put it down now. These are real-world words that real people use.
   Frankly, I wish I didn’t have to use them. I find a more poetic, subtle approach to sexuality more romantic. Not to mention tasteful. It seems to me that the Bible—while not lacking in sexual instruction, ethic, and purpose—often presents the subject in veiled terms, leaving us unblushed by its modest references to a gift so tender. I’d like to write more like that, and I have in previous books, but not this one.
   We don’t live in a modest world. And the fact is, I’m not a spiritual monk.
   And you probably aren’t either.
   My intention isn’t to shock you as I approach this topic more directly than I have before. And I don’t think I will. It’s not as if you haven’t heard about oral sex or girls kissing girls. My intention is to be relevant and to bring some practical clarity to the sadly common temptations our culture presses at you. I believe this is also a biblical approach. After all, think about the two letters Paul sent to the Corinthian church. While many subjects are covered in these letters and we can’t be sure exactly what was in the letters from the church to the apostle that precipitated his response, it seems that the Corinthians were asking a lot of practical questions about marriage and sex. They were conflicted by the promiscuous culture that surrounded them. So they wondered, “Is it even good to be married?” (Perhaps you wonder that too.) “Because sex is perverted, shouldn’t we also abstain in marriage?” (That one was way off course!) “If my spouse is unsaved, should I get divorced?”
   The apostle answered their questions.
   One by one.
   He clearly addressed their uncertainties and confusion—and I hope to do the same for you. Well, I hope we can find some answers together. If you press into your questions and I press into my research, we can link the two to find some answers to the questions our cultural experiences tend to raise.
   You and I live in a rather promiscuous culture, and questions about sex burn through our minds. And while I really hope you’ll build a great sexual theology as you think over what you find in these pages, I also want you to have a practical understanding of how to live it out. So I’ve spent a lot of time with college-aged young women in intimate conversation about the burning questions that run through their heads—the ones the world tries to address in its sexual excess but the church often runs from.
   “Is masturbation a sin?”
      “How do I know if he’s the one?”
         “What if he has a problem with porn?”
            “What if I’m a lesbian?”
   And hold on to your seat—there’s more!
   It is my hope that these very direct, very practical pages will give you the answers you need to live out what you believe. After all, what good is a sexual theology if it doesn’t speak to the issues of this contemporary day and age, where few are spiritual monks?
   So what am I if not a spiritual monk?
   Am I a girl gone wild?
   No.
   I am a biblical woman who loves God’s Word and feasts on it each day.
   I am a sinful woman who has been healed by the perfecting love of my Savior.
   I am a wife and mother who is honored to serve the Father in those roles.
   I am an author empowered by the Holy Spirit to write and live out Truth.
   I am a girl who occasionally watches The Ellen Show, and I think she’s sweet and funny and generous.
   And that’s where it starts to get complicated—when my private, God-loving self interacts with a real world that doesn’t acknowledge Him as God. Just like you, I am trying to live out my faith in a very crazy world. Which is why I’m so glad to have found some tremendous clarity in God’s Word, which gives you and me a very clear definition of sex to consider. This definition answers every burning question and is thoroughly relevant for today. Once I discovered it, confusion over sexual questions was easy to resolve. I even came to understand why as a little girl I was predisposed to dressing up like a princess and dreaming that my prince would one day come. No one taught me to do that. It was a natural yearning as my heart began its search for my life partner.
   For me, that dream came to its culmination during a thrilling moment of made-for-TV romance!
   I was in college, and I was in love. Had been for two years. One problem: my prince was graduating, while I was obligated to one more year of servitude at Cedarville University. My boyfriend, Bob, had a part in Senior Night, a hilariously dramatic look back at the class’s four years. Naturally I planned to attend, but my heart was so sad. In fewer than twenty-four hours, he would be gone and I would be left behind for a quiet summer of classes.
   After a quick bite at Colonial Pizza, Bob and I made our way to the university’s chapel. I found some friends to sit with. He made his way backstage.
   I laughed my way through much of the night, but then Dr. Jim Phipps and Professor Meg Wheeler, the night’s emcees, began to talk about all the guys who’d recently been thrown into Cedar Lake. Getting thrown into the lake was every guy’s reward for flashing a diamond in front of his girl and hearing the word yes. A rite of passage coveted by every college couple, lake activity was rampant just before graduation. A yearning washed over me as they talked about all the happy proposals.
   “What would a proposal like that look like?” The question was posed. And I wondered along with the audience.
   Then…
   Bob Gresh came out onto the stage…
            …with a black velvet box in his hand.
   He was searching for me in the audience as the spotlight followed him.
   My heart was thumping so heavily that I was certain it was shaking the solid twenty-foot pew I sat on—and everyone sitting on it with me.
   “And then I’d take her by the hand,” he said, offering the audience the play-by-play as he approached me.
   “And I’d lead her to the stage.” I followed him as he talked.
   A single chair was waiting for me. I plopped into it, weak at the knees.
   Then my prince bowed on one knee and took my left hand in his. “Dannah Barker,” he asked, looking lovingly into my eyes, “will you marry me?”
   I paused.
   Tears welling.
   My breath had truly been taken by the moment. Apparently so had the breath of everyone in the audience, who had now caught on to the fact that this was real. And some lovesick twenty-one-year-old guy had just put his heart out for the taking or rejecting. The only sound in my ears was my loudly thumping heart and Bob’s nervous breathing.
   Finally I nodded and barely mouthed the answer: “Yes!”
   Bob slipped a brilliant diamond onto my left ring finger and then stood, pumping his fist into the air in victory. The audience collectively took a deep breath and then jumped to their feet in wild applause.
   My prince had come!
   I recently reached the milestone of being with him more years than I’ve lived without him, and he has spent all of those years romancing me. It’s never, ever stopped. Girl, this is the kind of guy you want to marry. I’m talking about the kind of guy who welcomes you home from a long trip with lit candles leading the way to a bubble bath so you can relax. I’m talking about the kind of guy who whisks you away to New York City, having arranged for the two of you to spend days visiting every scene from your favorite romantic movie until your heart melts. I’m talking about the kind of guy who texts insane love notes to you all hours of the day. (Last month’s goofiest text was: “I love you more than Cheetos.” Unless you understand how much the man loves Cheetos, you cannot appreciate the romance of that one!)
   Do you want that kind of never-ending romance (okay, minus the Cheetos)? Dare to dig in with me for a few raw and real chapters about God, sex, and romance. Let me start in the next chapter by backing up a few years from Bob’s amazing marriage proposal to a time when I was asking a lot of questions myself.

From the Trade Paperback edition.

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Table of Contents

1 let's get real 1

2 clearly confused 9

3 yada. yada. yada 14

4 the one thing no one ever tells you about sex 20

5 not all sex is the same 29

6 friends with benefits 38

7 relational love 49

8 the lesbian question 59

9 sex is not a solo sport 70

10 our porn problem 80

11 exclusive love 92

12 the line 107

13 starting over 119

14 finding yada 131

15 faithful love 141

16 the yearning 153

discussion questions 161

acknowledgments 165

notes 169

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First Chapter

What Are You Waiting For?

The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex
By Dannah Gresh

WaterBrook Press

Copyright © 2011 Dannah Gresh
All right reserved.

ISBN: 9781601423313

Chapter 1: let’s get real

This book is not for spiritual monks.
   If you spend more of your time at church getting to know God’s Word than out in the world living it, you probably won’t like this book. It’s raw and real. If you can’t handle words like masturbation, orgasm, and porn, you should just put it down now. These are real-world words that real people use.
   Frankly, I wish I didn’t have to use them. I find a more poetic, subtle approach to sexuality more romantic. Not to mention tasteful. It seems to me that the Bible—while not lacking in sexual instruction, ethic, and purpose—often presents the subject in veiled terms, leaving us unblushed by its modest references to a gift so tender. I’d like to write more like that, and I have in previous books, but not this one.
   We don’t live in a modest world. And the fact is, I’m not a spiritual monk.
   And you probably aren’t either.
   My intention isn’t to shock you as I approach this topic more directly than I have before. And I don’t think I will. It’s not as if you haven’t heard about oral sex or girls kissing girls. My intention is to be relevant and to bring some practical clarity to the sadly common temptations our culture presses at you. I believe this is also a biblical approach. After all, think about the two letters Paul sent to the Corinthian church. While many subjects are covered in these letters and we can’t be sure exactly what was in the letters from the church to the apostle that precipitated his response, it seems that the Corinthians were asking a lot of practical questions about marriage and sex. They were conflicted by the promiscuous culture that surrounded them. So they wondered, “Is it even good to be married?” (Perhaps you wonder that too.) “Because sex is perverted, shouldn’t we also abstain in marriage?” (That one was way off course!) “If my spouse is unsaved, should I get divorced?”
   The apostle answered their questions.
   One by one.
   He clearly addressed their uncertainties and confusion—and I hope to do the same for you. Well, I hope we can find some answers together. If you press into your questions and I press into my research, we can link the two to find some answers to the questions our cultural experiences tend to raise.
   You and I live in a rather promiscuous culture, and questions about sex burn through our minds. And while I really hope you’ll build a great sexual theology as you think over what you find in these pages, I also want you to have a practical understanding of how to live it out. So I’ve spent a lot of time with college-aged young women in intimate conversation about the burning questions that run through their heads—the ones the world tries to address in its sexual excess but the church often runs from.
   “Is masturbation a sin?”
      “How do I know if he’s the one?”
         “What if he has a problem with porn?”
            “What if I’m a lesbian?”
   And hold on to your seat—there’s more!
   It is my hope that these very direct, very practical pages will give you the answers you need to live out what you believe. After all, what good is a sexual theology if it doesn’t speak to the issues of this contemporary day and age, where few are spiritual monks?
   So what am I if not a spiritual monk?
   Am I a girl gone wild?
   No.
   I am a biblical woman who loves God’s Word and feasts on it each day.
   I am a sinful woman who has been healed by the perfecting love of my Savior.
   I am a wife and mother who is honored to serve the Father in those roles.
   I am an author empowered by the Holy Spirit to write and live out Truth.
   I am a girl who occasionally watches The Ellen Show, and I think she’s sweet and funny and generous.
   And that’s where it starts to get complicated—when my private, God-loving self interacts with a real world that doesn’t acknowledge Him as God. Just like you, I am trying to live out my faith in a very crazy world. Which is why I’m so glad to have found some tremendous clarity in God’s Word, which gives you and me a very clear definition of sex to consider. This definition answers every burning question and is thoroughly relevant for today. Once I discovered it, confusion over sexual questions was easy to resolve. I even came to understand why as a little girl I was predisposed to dressing up like a princess and dreaming that my prince would one day come. No one taught me to do that. It was a natural yearning as my heart began its search for my life partner.
   For me, that dream came to its culmination during a thrilling moment of made-for-TV romance!
   I was in college, and I was in love. Had been for two years. One problem: my prince was graduating, while I was obligated to one more year of servitude at Cedarville University. My boyfriend, Bob, had a part in Senior Night, a hilariously dramatic look back at the class’s four years. Naturally I planned to attend, but my heart was so sad. In fewer than twenty-four hours, he would be gone and I would be left behind for a quiet summer of classes.
   After a quick bite at Colonial Pizza, Bob and I made our way to the university’s chapel. I found some friends to sit with. He made his way backstage.
   I laughed my way through much of the night, but then Dr. Jim Phipps and Professor Meg Wheeler, the night’s emcees, began to talk about all the guys who’d recently been thrown into Cedar Lake. Getting thrown into the lake was every guy’s reward for flashing a diamond in front of his girl and hearing the word yes. A rite of passage coveted by every college couple, lake activity was rampant just before graduation. A yearning washed over me as they talked about all the happy proposals.
   “What would a proposal like that look like?” The question was posed. And I wondered along with the audience.
   Then…
   Bob Gresh came out onto the stage…
            …with a black velvet box in his hand.
   He was searching for me in the audience as the spotlight followed him.
   My heart was thumping so heavily that I was certain it was shaking the solid twenty-foot pew I sat on—and everyone sitting on it with me.
   “And then I’d take her by the hand,” he said, offering the audience the play-by-play as he approached me.
   “And I’d lead her to the stage.” I followed him as he talked.
   A single chair was waiting for me. I plopped into it, weak at the knees.
   Then my prince bowed on one knee and took my left hand in his. “Dannah Barker,” he asked, looking lovingly into my eyes, “will you marry me?”
   I paused.
   Tears welling.
   My breath had truly been taken by the moment. Apparently so had the breath of everyone in the audience, who had now caught on to the fact that this was real. And some lovesick twenty-one-year-old guy had just put his heart out for the taking or rejecting. The only sound in my ears was my loudly thumping heart and Bob’s nervous breathing.
   Finally I nodded and barely mouthed the answer: “Yes!”
   Bob slipped a brilliant diamond onto my left ring finger and then stood, pumping his fist into the air in victory. The audience collectively took a deep breath and then jumped to their feet in wild applause.
   My prince had come!
   I recently reached the milestone of being with him more years than I’ve lived without him, and he has spent all of those years romancing me. It’s never, ever stopped. Girl, this is the kind of guy you want to marry. I’m talking about the kind of guy who welcomes you home from a long trip with lit candles leading the way to a bubble bath so you can relax. I’m talking about the kind of guy who whisks you away to New York City, having arranged for the two of you to spend days visiting every scene from your favorite romantic movie until your heart melts. I’m talking about the kind of guy who texts insane love notes to you all hours of the day. (Last month’s goofiest text was: “I love you more than Cheetos.” Unless you understand how much the man loves Cheetos, you cannot appreciate the romance of that one!)
   Do you want that kind of never-ending romance (okay, minus the Cheetos)? Dare to dig in with me for a few raw and real chapters about God, sex, and romance. Let me start in the next chapter by backing up a few years from Bob’s amazing marriage proposal to a time when I was asking a lot of questions myself.

Continues...

Excerpted from What Are You Waiting For? by Dannah Gresh Copyright © 2011 by Dannah Gresh. Excerpted by permission of WaterBrook Press, a division of Random House, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 22 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(12)

4 Star

(6)

3 Star

(0)

2 Star

(2)

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(2)

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 22 Customer Reviews
  • Posted May 26, 2011

    What are you waiting for?

    I decided to read this book so that I can be prepared for my daughter one day and know just what to say. This is a great book for young single women to read. I hope that I can pass it down to some of the young women in our church so that they will not make any mistakes and know just what they are waiting for. This book tells the biblical truth about sex to godly women who need to know everything about it. The author, Dannah Gresh gets to the nitty gritty but, stays truthful in everything about sex. The book is an easy short read and has a nice layout. I love the way she uses pages to put real life experiences and examples that she has seen and done in her life span. There are little excerpts and bible verses that are placed throughout the book in little boxes that add a little extra bonus to the book.

    One of the things in the book I really enjoyed was the way she explained the actual science of sex that makes it so addictive and leads young women to make the decisions they do. As a nurse, I am familiar with this but often have trouble trying to explain it to others but, Dannah puts it clear. Dannah uses herself as an example in this book and really puts it all out there which helps you connect with her. If you have any questions about sex and Gods plan for sex, this is the book you need to read. If you are a single young woman it is a must read, but it is also a good read for us married folks as well. Dannah answers those sensitive questions that we as a culture have to deal with this day and time. I highly recommend this book to all women.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted June 24, 2011

    You Just Said S-E-X!

    Warning! If talking about s-e-x makes you uncomfortable then you will be more than a little uncomfortable reading this review and even more so reading this book.


    I really appreciated the way that Dannah Gresh treated sex with respect but dealt with the issues truthfully and frankly. I don't know that hers was a message that I had never heard before, but it did provide different terminology. Gresh bases her book around the Biblical word for sex between a husband and wife - yada.


    As Gresh explains what yada is and what it truly means to experience biblical sex, she also takes time to deal with the many counterfeits for yada that the world is trying to sell us. She talks about how the idea of friends with benefits is flawed in its very principle that you can even have sex without attaching yourself to your sexual partner. Did you know that you are biologically unable to have sex with another person without forming an emotional attachment to them? She talks about same sex attraction and why it happens. Plus she confronts many other common ideas touted by the world and shows the biblical and scientific principles that either refute or confirm them.


    You can't read this book without learning something. I enjoyed this new perspective on sex. The book was well written and easy to follow. It also contained true stories of individuals who have bought into the world's lies about sex and how they have dealt with the consequences. This book is a great resource for personal or Bible study use. I recommend it to anyone high school age and above, especially Bible study teachers and youth ministers.

    A free copy of this book was provided to me by Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing for review purposes.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted June 20, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    Not for me

    When I first read about this book, I thought it was interesting. I thought it would be neat to see what I thought would be a different view on sex from what I was originally taught in church: no premarital sex, no masturbation, and being anything but straight is a sin. 

    The beginnings of Dannah Gresh's book was really great. She gave us really interesting facts about dating, introduced new Hebrew to our vocabulary, and gave some fascinating quotes from the Bible. But here is where I started to lost interest. Gresh's work is just like everything you've ever been taught about sex. I commend her for using scientific facts about the brain in her work, but it was nothing different or new. 

    I never finished the book. I will admit that. I am a supported of gay rights, and was turned off by her mentions of women who are "in recovery" of being lesbian. Unfortunately, my views clashed with Gresh's. 

    Though we do not see eye-to-eye, I must admit that this book is very well done. She clearly researched all of her facts. I particularly liked how she included stories and anecdotes from her life and other women's lives. This book is great for reinforcing the standard Christian views on marriage, and even though my views differ, I would give Gresh 4 out of 5 stars for such a well-researched work and such a candid book.  

    I was given this book to review free of charge through the Blogging for Books program an was not required to write a positive review.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted June 16, 2011

    A MUST read for young women

    Are you unsure of God's thoughts on sex? Then let Dannah Gresh show you the ancient Hebrew words and what they mean to you and your sexual relationships.

    In this book Dannah Gresh will talk about:

    the dangers with pornography
    where to draw the line with kissing, fondling, and oral sex
    how to identify the lies associated with lesbianism
    what happens when you have a friendship with benefits

    My thoughts-

    When I was single I wish I had been able to read a book like this. If I had had a book like this then I would have known the love of God and how much more important that is than any love from a person. And how God's love will help me to love myself and my boyfriend/spouse.

    This should be required reading for all girls when they are in high school, whether it be in school or church classes. They will learn why they should not have "friends with benefits" or why pornography shouldn't be watched.

    The chapter I thought was the best was, "The Line," and it talked about where you should draw the line with kissing, fondling, and oral sex. As women we need to know exactly where we will draw the line and to go no further.

    I would highly recommend this book to teens and young adults.

    Disclosure of Material Connection- I received What Are You Waiting For? by Dannah Gresh for free from the WaterBrook Multnomah "Blogging For Books" program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255.

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  • Posted June 14, 2011

    Great Book

    Dannah Gresh's book, What Are You Waiting For?, approaches and explores the issues of sexual purity. Written primarily for young women, the book starts by stating that there is "one thing no one ever tells you about sex" in today's culture, then goes on to explain, in part, biblical manhood and womanhood, Scripture regarding sex, and insight regarding purity from a youth-centered perspective.

    The book is well written and easy to read. Gresh doesn't shy away from "Christian taboo" topics like masturbation and porn, and she's transparent and honest in her own stories and encouragement. Her principles and ideas are relevant for single women of every age, although many of her examples are of women married very young, which misses entirely the huge, modern demographic of Christian women who are still unmarried in their late twenties, early thirties. Still, though, her advice is helpful and practical, and the book is a great first step to understanding purity from God's viewpoint in today's world.

    Many thanks to Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing for providing me with a copy of this book to review. All opinions expressed are mine entirely.

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  • Posted June 11, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    Great for pre-teen to college aged girls!

    The on thing no on ever tells you about sex. . . In What are you Waiting for? Dannah Gresh gets down to brass tacks about how our culture has made a deprave thing out of something God designed to be beautiful. She discusses the hottest topics of most teens in the 21st century, masturbation, lesbianism, and how far is too far. This book is a wonderful insight into God's love for us, and His divine plan for the marriage bed. I highly recommend that if you have a teenage daughter, you run out right now and not only buy What are you Waiting for? but also And the Bride Wore White.

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  • Posted June 8, 2011

    Amazing Insight to Christian Sexuality

    This book blew me away. Surprisingly, I had never before read anything written by Gresh. I say surprisingly because there was a time in my life when I read every book I could get my hands on about dating and purity (the Ludy's books, Elisabeth Elliot's Passion and Purity, the list goes on and on). Since I had read all those books, plus several books on sex within marriage, I wasn't sure that I would encounter anything new. "God wants us to have sex, just within marriage" - for 175 pages was what I was expecting. What I got, however, was totally new and fascinating, even as a married woman with a child! I do advise that this book is for young women, not older girls: I would recommend it for a mature high school student (maybe about 17 and above), simply because I believe the books requires an emotional maturity as well as the straightforward way it addresses issues like porn, masturbation, and lesbianism. And I wouldn't limit the audience to females: in fact, I was surprised the publishers did! I feel this book has tremendous insights for young men concerning pornography and the proper way to adore a woman. Please give this book a read, whether you are 17 or 47, male or female I'm sure you can find wisdom in it. Learn all about yada and the tremendous impact it can make in your life. I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review and I'm so glad I did!

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  • Posted May 17, 2011

    The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex!

    It is not just about waiting to have sex. It is about not giving my heart away. Its about not getting emotionally tied to any man that is not my husband. Most importantly, it is about an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. This is what author Dannah Gresh so amazingly communicates in her new book, What Are You Waiting For? This is a question that I have had to answer for myself in the past few years. Your parents can be godly, can share with you their desire for you to "wait for true love", they can give you rules and a purity ring, but ultimately YOU are the one that will have to decide what you are waiting for. This book addresses issues such as porn, homosexuality, masturbation - stuff that we are being faced with, stuff that our friends are being faced with in this fallen world that we live in. This book is not for the faint of heart, but the author's love for God is what makes her passionate about sharing candidly with young women. Her purpose in writing this book is to deal biblically with questions that every girl wants to ask about sex. These are the issues that, sadly, are not being dealt with in the church. People are embarrassed to talk about them. This saddens me because I know that our God created sex to be something so beautiful between a man and woman united under the covenant of marriage. While the church remains silent, our world is currently in the business of distorting what God made to be a precious and holy gift. When you finish this book, you will have a pretty incredible picture of God's design for sex. You would not believe how romantic and creative our God is!

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  • Posted April 21, 2011

    What does God have to say about sex?

    what are you waiting for? The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex is a book we have been waiting for about a topic that has not been tackled clearly enough, sex. Author Dannah Gresh in researching this topic has uncovered some fascinating things about God's purpose for the union that takes place between man and woman. The book is a combination of many things. First, the author has researched many words found in the original Biblical text and found that they don't mean exactly what the average person thinks they do. Second, Gresh shares from personal experience her own challenges surrounding this topic within her life and marriage. Finally, Gresh shares council on how to follow God's plan for this sexual union in order to have the healthiest experience a married couple can have. The author also tackles many tough subjects in this book. It makes me blush a little to even rewrite some of the chapter titles, but here goes! Chapter titles include but are not limited to: "not all sex is the same," "the lesbian question," "our porn problem," and "the line." All of the chapters were very informative and a super teaching and ministry tool. The one thing in the book I didn't completely understand was the prayer for breaking soul ties. That is something I will have to further research for myself. I learned while reading this book! I love it when I find something that teaches me and makes me better. This book gave me a better understanding of God's purpose(s) for sex. The author tackles some tough topics and answers them with the upmost respect for the reader with a heart of love. I was very impressed by her tact and ability to share what God's word says, in a non-confrontational manner, with the intent of bringing a hurting person to the light of God's truth. I recommend this book for anyone who would like to know more about what God's Word really says about the subject. It needs to be talked about because God created it and He said that everything He created is GOOD. If you have made mistakes in the past this book can put you on the road to overcoming them. I also think this book would be a helpful tool for parents of tweens and teens. Youth and college age ministry leaders would benefit from reading this book as well. Disclaimer: I received this book from Waterbrook Multonomah as part of their blogging program in exchange for a book review. I was not required to give a favorable review. The opinions expressed are clearly my own.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 15, 2011

    What Are You Waiting For? A disappointing read.

    I recently read What are you waiting for? written by Dannah Gresh. It is a newly published book that just came out this year. The book focuses on sex and states on the cover "The one thing no one ever tell you about sex". I am a college student, and was hoping it would be different than the many other Christian and non-Christian books I've read on the subject. It is a touchy topic to discuss and our world is consumed with everything that has to do with sex. As a college student, it is often all I hear talked about in a day. When I started reading it the author seemed to beat around the bush and explain that her book is better then the many other books written on the topic. She also states that if you can not handle what the book is being written about to not read it. This made me curious on what she had to say. I was extremely disappointed. It was nothing new to anything I have ever read. I do like some of the things she said about the lesbian question and she had some good tips on how to handle such feelings. As for the rest of the book, it was a "beat around the bush to make it sound like I'm saying something new". I believe such a book should have deeper thinking and not just skimming the top of what everyone already knows. Gresh does say words like pornography, and masturbation. She is more upfront about things then most people are comfortable with. She portrays sex as a Godly act and something that means far more than just the word sex.
    Overall it was a well written opinionated book. I would not recommend it to anyone college age, but perhaps for younger teens who are discovering their sexuality.

    Note: I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review. This is my honest opinion on the book.

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  • Posted April 7, 2011

    A Must Read for Teens and Young Adults!

    "What Are You Waiting For?: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex" by Dannah Gresh, is a book that basicaly explains why you should wait to have sex until marriage.

    The big secret is the Hebrew word Yada, it means to know, to be known, and to be deeply respected. It also means sex, the kind of sex that is between a man and a wife. There is another word in the bible for meaningless or perverse sex and that is Shakab, when translated it literally means the exchanging of bodily fluids.

    Dannah explains how beautiful, meaningful, and loving sex can be in the context of a committed marriage. This is why you should not settle for Yada's counterfeit Shakab, it will just leave you dissappointed, hurt, and sad.

    I think teens will really listen to "What Are You Waiting For?" because Dannah does not come off as preachy, this is not just a book telling you all the things you cannot do. Dannah gets her point across with real life examples, basic neuroscience, and bible verses.

    Not only does "What Are You Waiting For?" go over abstinence, but she also answers all of your burning questions about sex with real honest answers through a Christian perspective. Lesbianism, Oral Sex, Masturbation, Porn..there is nothing that she skimps over.

    I highly recommend "What Are You Waiting For" to anyone who is waiting for marriage (knowing why you are waiting will help you), to anyone who has a teenage daughter (or son!), or to young adults who are interested in learning more about Chrisitanity, sex, and relationships.

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  • Posted March 15, 2011

    A Must Read

    This was a fabulous book and I already want to read it over again. Yes, the book is about sex, a touchy topic in any circle but particularly in the Christian perspective. However, Dannah Gresh does an excellent job of writing for young women in a way that they can understand why you should wait, what boundaries you should put in place, the type of relationships to nurture (both friends and boyfriends) and what God has to say about sex. It's not all hellfire and brimstone nor is it the base of "you're just not supposed to do it". There's reasoning, there's Scripture, there's time taken to explain it so that every question that has ever come across your mind is answered - at least in short form. It was a quick read but touched on many topics and was well worth the time and effort to sit down and go through it. I'd highly recommend it for mothers of teen girls, youth leaders and even adult women.

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  • Posted February 28, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    What Are You Waiting For?

    This book on--ahem--sexuality is written with a Christian perspective. The author quotes Scripture every now and then and goes over hot-button topics that most people would blush at. The cover boasts that there is something no one tells you about sex. I hate to be a spoiler, but you guys would have discovered this early in the book anyway. The author goes back to Hebrew translations of the Bible where to have intercourse with someone was called "yada" and meant to know. This is for a one-to-one relationship between a man and a wife. In the Bible, there is another term for sex outside of marriage (often with harlots) that is translated to literally just being an exchange of bodily fluids. The author also uses statistics and simple neuroscience to get her points across. The main thing that this book focuses on is that sex outside of marriage will never be the deep and intimate "yada"; it will just be an exchange of fluids that leaves you broken and sad. While the book is geared towards females, males can read it, too.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 24, 2011

    Not a Fan

    I feel like I should start off this review by sharing that I didn't read the summary of the book on my book review website before requesting it. I simply looked at the title and author and decided to get it.
    I probably won't do that again. Not because the book I received was bad...but it was about sex. And honestly, that's not really the kind of book I choose off of a shelf to read. Dannah Gresh is an amazing author and one of my favorites. I really enjoyed And the Bride Wore White when I read it all those years ago. And it definitely shaped some of the relationship choices I am making today. But honestly, this book was a little too much. There were some points that I liked...and others that I'm going to admit I skipped the whole chapter. I'm not going to recommend you go out and purchase this book unless you're looking for something like, well, this book. It's definitely geared towards college/ young-adult pre-marriage years.

    I know that I'm not alone in my embracing singleness journey. It's something I've set forth upon (partially because of choice and partially due to the fact that no one is really knocking on my door). And while it's a stage of life that I'm at, it's not always easy. It's not exactly a great topic to discuss over lunch. I mean, "Yeah, I'm letting God write my love story and praying about where he may lead me" isn't exactly dinnertime discussion. But, it's the truth. The main focus of this book is the concept of yada. Yada is a Hebrew verb that means "to know, to be known, to be deeply respected". Yes, sometimes it gets used in the context of sex. But only the holy kind...you know, the kind that happens during marriage. Not the Sodom and Gomorrah kind. And it's not really in the act, it's in the relationship. So, this word is also used in reference to our relationship with God. It's the word used in the verse "Be still and know [yada] I am God". It's something sacred. Something holy. Something beautiful.

    And that's what I got out of this book. As I said before, it really didn't speak to me. And I'll probably learn to read summaries and not rush through when picking out my book next time. :)

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  • Posted January 12, 2011

    A breath of fresh air, a must-have

    I received this book free for review from WaterBrook Multinoma Publishing Group.

    What Are You Waiting For: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex by Dannah Gresh is a breath of fresh air. Dannah writes to college aged women in great detail to answer questions about sexuality and female-ness. I absolutely recommend it to young women in college, or getting ready to start college, or just with questions about God's design for sexuality. I also recommend this book for young men that want to understand why women are designed the way they are, or have questions about God's design for sexuality. Even though this is written for young women, it is absolutely relevant for young men.

    Buy this for your daughter, your niece, youth pastor, friend, cousin... this is a valuable addition to your library.

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