White Girl Problems

( 194 )

Overview

Babe Walker, center of the universe, is a painstakingly manicured white girl with an expensive smoothie habit, a proclivity for Louboutins, a mysterious mother she's never met, and approximately 50 bajillion Twitter followers. But her "problems" have landed her in shopping rehab-that's what happens when you spend $246,893.50 in one afternoon at Barneys. Now she's decided to write her memoir, revealing the gut-wrenching hurdles she's had to ...

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White Girl Problems

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Overview

Babe Walker, center of the universe, is a painstakingly manicured white girl with an expensive smoothie habit, a proclivity for Louboutins, a mysterious mother she's never met, and approximately 50 bajillion Twitter followers. But her "problems" have landed her in shopping rehab-that's what happens when you spend $246,893.50 in one afternoon at Barneys. Now she's decided to write her memoir, revealing the gut-wrenching hurdles she's had to overcome in order to be perfect in every way, every day. Hurdles such as:

  • I hate my horse.
  • Every job I've ever had is the worst job I've ever had.
  • He's not a doctor, a lawyer, or a prince.
  • I'll eat anything, as long as it's gluten-free, dairy-free, low-carb, low-fat, low-calorie, sugar-free, and organic.
In an Adderall-induced flash of inspiration, Babe Walker has managed to create one of the most enjoyable, unforgettable memoirs in years.
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Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly
Twitter feed phenomenon Babe Walker, the booze-fueled creation of brothers Tanner and David Oliver Cohen and gal pal Lara Schoenhals, makes the leap onto the printed page with a snarky, satirical diary/memoir of how the poor-little-rich-girl goes from the lap of luxury to rehab after a ,893.50 shopping spree meltdown at Barneys. "I'm standing on the snowcapped mountain of my life, and the horizon looks beautiful," Babe writes in the first entry of her rehab diary, followed by: "I don't know, I just copied most of that from one of the pamphlets they gave me. I'm on a lot of Ativan right now." With a friends-and-family circle consisting of her music-industry lawyer dad, Jamaican baby nurse Mabinty, frenemy Genevieve, and gay-guy BFF Roman, Babe is a chic shopaholic in search of a labiaplasty, a therapist, a job, and true love. She's also a confessed train wreck, and giddily invites you to stare. And just when you think you might finally need to look away, there's the impossibly startling—and hilarious—faux insight that keeps you hooked. Take Babe's wicked grandmother (think Auntie Mame), who delivers epistolary post-mortem advice that Babe takes to heart (and to rehab): "Never cry. It causes swelling." Agent: Byrd Leavell, Waxman Literary Agency. (Feb.)
From the Publisher
"I now have a girl crush on Babe Walker! Laugh-out-loud, pee-in-your-Cosabellas funny."—Tori Spelling, author of Uncharted TerriTori

"White Girl Problems makes me laugh a lot, and cry a little. It's about time someone drew our attention to the devastating reality: White girl problems are all around us . . . absolutely hysterical."—Susan Sarandon

"Babe Walker will be your new best friend and worst enemy. I loved it!"—Emma Roberts

"The epitome of the urban socialite you love to hate."—Time magazine

"A social satire in the guise of a memoir. . . . The most artful elements are the charming fashion illustrations peppered throughout Walker's half-million followers on Twitter and the public's bottomless appetite for news about real-life socialites like the Kardashians prove that a large audience for this story does exist."—Booklist

Tori Spelling
"I now have a girl crush on Babe Walker! Laugh-out-loud, pee-in-your-Cosabellas funny."
Susan Sarandon
"White Girl Problems makes me laugh a lot, and cry a little. It's about time someone drew our attention to the devastating reality: White girl problems are all around us . . . absolutely hysterical."
Emma Roberts
"Babe Walker will be your new best friend and worst enemy. I loved it!"
Time magazine
"The epitome of the urban socialite you love to hate."
Booklist
"A social satire in the guise of a memoir. . . . The most artful elements are the charming fashion illustrations peppered throughout Walker's half-million followers on Twitter and the public's bottomless appetite for news about real-life socialites like the Kardashians prove that a large audience for this story does exist."
Kirkus Reviews
Poor little rich girl Babe Walker hits rock bottom during a Barneys shopping spree in this faux memoir based on a popular Twitter feed. In a town (Los Angeles, naturally) filled with the chronically self-absorbed, Babe stands out. The precocious only child of a wildly successful British entertainment lawyer and a long-absent mystery woman, Babe is raised for the most part by her Jamaican nanny, Mabinty. Mabinty smokes a lot of weed and speaks with an exaggerated patois--or at least she does in Babe's point of view, which is none too reliable. Diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder at the tender age of 7, Babe has serious boundary issues. As a sophomore, she plots to lose her virginity to her gay best friend Roman (while they are dressed as Danny and Sandy from Grease). In her teens she lobbies a series of befuddled plastic surgeons for a labiaplasty, insisting that her vagina needs to be "cute and chic-er and more…me." She steals her file from her longtime therapist, Susan, and goes to five different colleges before deciding academia might not be her thing. And when she does meet a nice guy who actually likes her, she transforms into her alter ego Babette, a slutty stalker with an unfortunate taste for tacky chain restaurants. Showing some aptitude for fashion, Babe is understandably devastated when her line of high-end dashikis for African children fails, and soon after that another romantic disappointment triggers the mother of all retail binges. After spending a cool $246,893.50 at Barneys, she cops to needing some help and sends herself to Cirque Lodge, a Utah rehab facility. Once there, she resists actually changing but manages to bond with an alcoholic former model who might actually hold a key piece to the puzzle that is Babe. A pop-culture send-up with a troubled material girl anti-heroine. Although wickedly funny at times, this odd debut takes a shallow, cavalier attitude toward mental illness, anorexia and addiction.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781452657394
  • Publisher: Tantor Media, Inc.
  • Publication date: 5/14/2012
  • Format: MP3 on CD
  • Edition description: MP3 - Unabridged CD
  • Product dimensions: 5.30 (w) x 7.40 (h) x 0.60 (d)

Meet the Author

Babe Walker lives (and very occasionally works) in LA. Her creators are David Oliver Cohen, Tanner Cohen, and Lara Schoenhals, all actors and writers who live in both New York and LA.

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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 194 )
Rating Distribution

5 Star

(120)

4 Star

(31)

3 Star

(19)

2 Star

(8)

1 Star

(16)

Your Rating:

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 194 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted September 9, 2012

    Easy read, but unfortunate...

    This book was an easy read (2 days), but it was not what i expected.... I saw the other reviews of "hilarious" and "must read" and didnt go much farther than that. While there were some parts that made me laugh, I ended up feeling sorry for the girl. And then at the end, I was disappointed that I contributed $8 and change to this girl who hasn't got a clue and will go on in life thinking she is successful, while she should feel embarrassed. Needless to say.... this wasn't what i expected. I thought it'd be more along the lines of Jenna Marbles, but it is not.

    18 out of 24 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted February 14, 2012

    Super fun read

    I've been following White Girl Problems on twitter for quite some time now and loving each tweet. The book is just as entertaining as the tweets are, it sucked when I was done. The writing is great comedy, kind of like reading a Chelsea Handler book. The book made me want to be bff with and hate Babe Walker both at the same time. Very entertaining and I would highly reccommend.

    12 out of 18 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted February 2, 2012

    Hilariously Funny

    Hands down, this is the most entertaining book I have read. Ever. If you haven't done so already, buy this book. You will laugh out loud at least 50 times.

    11 out of 15 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 2, 2012

    The movie "Clueless" in a book version

    So I grab this book for some light reading to pass the time as Im on the elliptical. As I got to about chapter 4 I thought to myself "Ive read this before"...but then thought again and realized I was reading a knockoff of "Clueless". The stories are a little different but basically same plot. Im surprised the writers of the movie didnt catch on to this book yet and sued the writer, its clearly the same story.

    10 out of 13 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted February 2, 2012

    PERFECT!

    This is easily the most entertaining book i've ever read. I like funny & THIS is funny. Seriously... read it. Now.

    10 out of 14 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted May 25, 2012

    Waste of money.

    Like the author was just made a list everything she could think of that was shocking and tried to make a story around that. It was like rwading something when someone has used a thesaurus for a lot of words. It didn't flow. Bad.

    8 out of 9 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 30, 2012

    good

    it was fun and interesting, wasn't wowed just pleased.

    8 out of 11 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 17, 2012

    Don't bother

    So I was looking for some funny fluff reading, where I was guaranteed not to learn anything, nor to gain any life lessons. I just wanted uplifting filler after surgery. I read GCB (HIGHLY recommend for this genre) and was hungry for more. This is based on a fictional character who was created through a twitter account. The writing is atrocious, the stories are ridiculous and worst of all, I didn't care about the main character. I got to chapter 3 and regretted my purchase. All I ask is that I love or hate the main character, but I just wanted her to go away.

    6 out of 10 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted September 13, 2012

    This Book Cracked Me all The way Up!!! I did Not want it to End

    This Book Cracked Me all The way Up!!! I did Not want it to End :o( it was such a Fun read!! It was so Funny I brought a Copy for My BFF and she just loved it

    5 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted April 2, 2012

    Strange sense of humor or no at all!

    Not funny, unless one has a strange sense if humor. This book is not worth buying! Poorly written too.

    5 out of 11 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 29, 2012

    Unimpressed

    Meh. I was underwhelmed - she's not THAT funny.

    3 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted September 13, 2012

    lol

    lol

    2 out of 9 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted August 17, 2012

    Great read!!

    One of the best books ive read in a long time. Keeps you entertained throughout the book. Since reading it, everyone is my family has purchased a copy since i talk about it too much. Love it!!!

    2 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted July 19, 2012

    Hysterically Funny!

    All I really can say about this book was that within the first few pages I was laughing so hard I started to cry. I thought that was going to be a one time experience but it continued throughout the whole book even at the dismay of my family when I was laughing a little too loud and too much. Highly recommended if you want a good book to brighten your day.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 30, 2012

    Amazing! Outsanding!

    This book was so funny! I would stay up all night reading this and wake up my family with my laughter. It is so good, a must read!!

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted June 12, 2012

    Wild Bird

    This book is completely hilarious. It had me laughing out loud through the whole thing. It definitely uplifted my spirits while at work.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Posted April 3, 2012

    This book is HILARIOUS. I could not put it down and was laughin

    This book is HILARIOUS. I could not put it down and was laughing out loud. If you like the writing style of Chelsea Handler, this is a MUST read!!

    1 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted March 29, 2012

    So funny, I didn't want it to end!

    I absolutely loved this book! Definitely the funniest book Ive read. An easy, light, fun, clever book. Strongly recommend it!

    1 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 24, 2012

    Loved!

    This book is soooooo hilarious! I couldn't stop reading it and
    When I was done I was so upset because I wanted more! Great read!

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
  • Anonymous

    Posted February 23, 2012

    So funny!

    Like the other reviewers, I LOVED this book. Babe Walker is hilarious. A great book if you want a quick and easy read that will make you laugh out loud.

    1 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

    Was this review helpful? Yes  No   Report this review
See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 194 Customer Reviews

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