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Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.
     

Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.

4.5 14
by Joe Herzanek
 

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Solutions for families dealing with addiction. Packed with answers to find hope and direction, providing clarity to a complicated problem.

Discover how to:
-End the drama
-Stop enabling your loved-one
-Find real solutions - not temporary fixes
-Restore sanity to your life
-Save time, money, stress and heartache

Overview

Solutions for families dealing with addiction. Packed with answers to find hope and direction, providing clarity to a complicated problem.

Discover how to:
-End the drama
-Stop enabling your loved-one
-Find real solutions - not temporary fixes
-Restore sanity to your life
-Save time, money, stress and heartache
-Bring peace back to your family

This may be the most important step you will ever take toward changing the life of a friend or loved one suffering from addiction.

Answers to these questions and more:
-Can someone be totally set free from addiction?
-Can Meth addicts really recover?
-What to do about someone hooked on their pain meds?
-What doesn't help, what does--and why?

For family members who want to help--but don't know where to start.

Answers not found in any other materials on addiction and recovery.

Reviews:
Got an addiction problem in your family? Read this book. Joe knows his stuff. This book helps you to better understand those who are dealing with friends and family that are addicted to drugs and alcohol. I have read several of these books but this one is the best. --RJ (Amazon review)

Best book ever about addiction. Written by one whose done it and is recovering. Easy to read, not preachy, just honest. I recommend this book to anyone with an addict in their life! --Lynda A (Amazon review)

Your story has encouraged me and helped me to deal with my son's addictions and has given me great peace as a parent. I no longer feel alone with a terrible cloud of guilt, my son's choices have been his own, and I as a parent have done all I can. I will continue to love him and encourage him and, as far as possible allow him to make his mistakes knowing that it is okay to do so. Your book exposed my own trigger points and how I can handle them better. I can put away the guilt and the shame, pick up my own pieces and move forward, helping him to do the same. --Kathy Cowley, Parent, Longmont, Colorado

Many of you reading this book are facing the battle of your life. Alcohol and drugs consumed my daughter's life. I can't put into words the anguish of attending my daughter's funeral. I wish I would have had this book long ago. Maybe Mia would still be here. I didn't know how to help her.

Why Don't They Just Quit? is full of answers I could have used. --Pam M. (Mia's Mom), Niwot, Colorado

I, like many people, have some knowledge of what drugs and addiction are, but are clueless on what the process of recovery entails.
This book does a great job in what it would take to help a love one, who is an addict and is willing to get clean and stay clean. It also gives one hope that your love one will survive the nightmare they are living through with their family. --CG (Amazon review)



Product Description

Real-life solutions to help you now! Watching a loved one immersed in an intense battle with alcohol and drug abuse may be the most difficult, complex and harrowing experience youll ever have. This book offers a message of hope to families and friends, giving practical solutions so they can help anyone struggling with addiction to begin the road to recovery.
You will learn: Why a person doesn't have to hit rock-bottom before getting help. (page 111)
When helping is actually hurting. (page 57)
Why quitting is not the same as recovering. (page 5)
How to deal with a relapse. (page 187)
How to receive 50 percent or more off the cost of treatment. (page 97)
Why a parent would leave their child due to their addiction. (page 245)
Why effective intervention doesn't have to be a surprise attack. (page 49)
Answers to over 30 common, and not so common questions.
Inspiring first-hand recovery stories from real people!

Editorial Reviews

addiction2recovery.com - Mike Richards
"This book will be valued by many, many people. A very meaningful gift of God's grace to families who need sanity in the middle of their runaway insanity."
Boulder County Sheriff - Sheriff Joe Pelle
"Joe's book helps us to understand the addiction and recovery process. He combines a lifetime of personal and professional experience dealing with this issue in a practical and highly personal overview. The book is excellent. I wish I had read it a year ago."
Community Relations Specialist at Parker, Denver Valley Hope - Donna Schwartz
. . . stayed up late last night reading various parts of it; inspiring! This book is for people like me; someone with chemically addicted people in their life. If you, or someone you know and love, are living in the tornado of addiction, finding it spinning you around with your loved one, this book can be one of the most clear/helpful guides in understanding how to navigate through the confusion, drama and pain that is associated with addiction in a family. Passionate, humble, full of wisdom.
Substance Abuse Treatment Provider - Dr. Nicolas Taylor
"This book is a must read not only for families of addicts and alcoholics looking for answers, but for anyone who has been intrigued by irrational compulsions and wondered how recovery takes place. I consider Why Don't They Just Quit? to be one of the top five recovery books for families and I anticipate it being widely used by treatment programs throughout the country."
Executive Director at Transitions Recovery Program - Lee Barchan
"In Why Don't They Just Quit? Joe explains addiction and recovery in terms we all can understand. His book provides solutions to the problem. We recommend it to all the families at our center."
Mike Richards
"This book will be valued by many, many people. A very meaningful gift of God's grace to families who need sanity in the middle of their runaway insanity."
Sheriff Joe Pelle
"Joe's book helps us to understand the addiction and recovery process. He combines a lifetime of personal and professional experience dealing with this issue in a practical and highly personal overview. The book is excellent. I wish I had read it a year ago."
Donna Schwartz
. . . stayed up late last night reading various parts of it; inspiring! This book is for people like me; someone with chemically addicted people in their life. If you, or someone you know and love, are living in the tornado of addiction, finding it spinning you around with your loved one, this book can be one of the most clear/helpful guides in understanding how to navigate through the confusion, drama and pain that is associated with addiction in a family. Passionate, humble, full of wisdom.
Dr. Nicholas Taylor
"This book is a must read not only for families of addicts and alcoholics looking for answers, but for anyone who has been intrigued by irrational compulsions and wondered how recovery takes place. I consider Why Don't They Just Quit? to be one of the top five recovery books for families and I anticipate it being widely used by treatment programs throughout the country."
Lee Barchan
"In Why Don’t They Just Quit? Joe explains addiction and recovery in terms we all can understand. His book provides solutions to the problem. We recommend it to all the families at our center.”

Product Details

BN ID:
2940011815454
Publisher:
Changing Lives Foundation
Publication date:
01/01/2015
Sold by:
Barnes & Noble
Format:
NOOK Book
Pages:
301
Sales rank:
256,280
File size:
1 MB

Meet the Author

Joe Herzanek, a man who battled his own demons of addiction over thirty years ago, says, “I know people can change. If I can do it, anyone can!” Joe’s own life struggles and practical advice offer hope and solutions to those living amidst the turmoil of someone’s alcohol and drug abuse.

From age 13 to 29, Joe battled his own drug and alcohol addiction—finally receiving treatment. He now has over 36 years of abstinence from substances.

Joe Herzanek is the president and founder of Changing Lives Foundation (a Colorado nonprofit organization). As a certified addiction professional in Colorado he has spent over twenty years working in the criminal justice system as the Chaplain at the Boulder County Jail and currently at the Weld County Jail (Greeley, CO). Joe is the former host of Recovery Television, speaker, producer of several DVDs, including “The 10 Toughest Questions Families and Friends Ask About Addiction and Recovery” and "Why Don't They Just Quit METH? Families need help too."

His passion is to help men and women who are struggling with addiction, as well as providing answers and solutions to family and friends who are searching for ways to help their loved-one begin the road to recovery.

Joe Herzanek and his wife Judy have three (adult) children, Jami, Jake, and Jessica, and enjoy the beautiful Colorado outdoors with their two Cairn Terriers, Lewis and Clark.

Joe offers words of encouragement: “Addiction is not a hopeless situation,” he writes. “Addicts and alcoholics aren’t crazy, and they can quit.”

Customer Reviews

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Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery 4.4 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 17 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I recently purchased book ¿Why Don¿t They Just Quit¿ by Joe Herzanek. Having a son with a severe alcohol/drug abuse problem, who has been through more than one treatment program, I was desperately looking for answers, not hype or glitter.

I consider ¿Why Don¿t They Just Quit¿ to be my ¿Bible¿ on drug abuse issues affecting the addict and the families (I loaned it to my son¿s father and it looks like my Bible¿yellow hi-lights, post it notes, etc, etc.). I refer to it over and over. Mr. Herzanek lays it out in a straightforward way, using his and others¿ personal experiences to clarify the how and why of addiction and recovery. This is a must have tool for anyone that is impacted by a loved one¿s addiction.
FriendEP More than 1 year ago
Admitting to, seeking help for and recovering from any addiction is an amazing accomplishment!  And to share with honest transparency one’s own battles with raging internal demons is also admirable.  But to exquisitely draft one’s story in black and white for all to bare witness to and in turn learn from is beyond extraordinary! Former addict Joe Herzanek turned survivor, warrior and counselor along with his wife and co-author Judy, reveal their story in Why Don’t They Just Quit.  This book is real! Together as a family and as individuals, they have “walked the walk.”   The raw, honest, in-your-face openness without excuses or embarrassment is so genuine you can’t help but relate to the struggle.  We all have internal demons, just to varying degrees.   But life-ruining addiction is not a battle to be won without an army along side you and Herzanek knows and admits to this fact.  He identifies every manipulation, avoidance, denial, blame game, excuse etc. that addicts use to avoid responsibility.  And he knows them all because he has used them all.   This self-help book is the 2008 Indie Book Award Winner.  It is well written and laden with real effective techniques for families and friends of addicts.  What to do and what NOT to do; What to watch for; When and how to help; and so much more.   I especially appreciated his straight forward, user-friendly approach; at times I felt like Joe was in talking to me in real time.   The book is for everyone and anyone struggling not only with addictive personalities but also basic challenging parenting issues  My favorites simple but powerful messages are:  "Do you love your child enough to let him be mad at you?  Don Williams “When you blame others, you give up your power to change.”  Robert Anthony
Michigan52 More than 1 year ago
Not everything may apply but it really helps me to understand "NOT TO HELP" the addict because you are only hurting them. It's very difficult to say no but I will never give up hope. never.
FamilyCounselor More than 1 year ago
As a counselor, my clients always ask, "why don't they just quit?!"...This book helps them SOOOO much!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Everyone¿s heard an addict¿s story ¿ in one way or another. But, has anyone ever really understood it? From the opening page of this book, the reader is treated to real-life stories, practical tools and thought-provoking quotes that illustrate the journey to¿ through¿ and from addiction. The dynamics of the addict and their social structures are finally explained from the environments they migrate to, the people they surround themselves with and finally, to the families that suffer as they watch their loved one¿s battle with addiction. An addict does not have to be one who is addicted to alcohol, a narcotic or a prescription. It could be food, or acceptance, or the overwhelming need to `save¿ someone. No one is left behind in their quest for information in `Why Don¿t They Just Quit¿. This book will help not only the addict who doesn¿t yet `recognize¿ themselves. But, it could also help the family and loved ones who just don¿t get¿ why they don¿t just quit! This book is a page turning, `Most-Frequently-Asked-Questions¿ life-manual for anyone who wants to understand addiction and how it happens. With it, an addict is given the map on how they got that way and the tools they¿ll need to find their way back. Family, friends and the addict¿s significant others are encouraged to face the role they play in the addict¿s life. ¿Don¿t clean me up¿ I need to remember - and see - what I have done.¿ Everyone caught in the web of addiction are allowed, with this book, to interpret their actions and how they may be enabling the addict. Most of all, the addict learns to understand that quitting their addiction does not mean that they are no longer an addict¿ but that they are a recovering one. To stop using¿ does not `fix¿ you. You must fix you! Being clean and sober does not mean `the cure¿ has been found. That¿s when the work really begins - because everyone in an addict¿s life needs to recover. ¿To stop¿ is to begin.¿ 'Why Don¿t They Just Quit¿ is an amazing testimonial to the struggles of everyone involved in addiction. It describes the tools to be `well¿ and prompts the courage to use them! Kudos to the author's' to understand that people are interested in what the 'bystanders' go through when someone they love is addicted. I think there are a lot of books written about/to the addict, but not so many about those whose lives are affected¿ and how they cope. I think that the 'Al-Anon world' would be very interested. Everyone¿ should be interested in this book. Review By: Robin R. Rogers, Author of ROCK BOTTOM
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
JohnTNewton More than 1 year ago
Why Don't They Just Quit? By Joe Herzanek There are a great many books on addiction and recovery, and a lot of them are given the accolades 'must read', or 'essential reading'. It is refreshing to read a book that thoroughly deserves this kind of praise. In fairness a lot of the material read by this recovering addict has been academic in nature and very heavy going. This book, whose author obviously knows his subject, is very unmistakably intended to reach a much wider audience than the academic, or even the addict. The book, while it contains much important information and help for the recovering addict or alcoholic, clearly has another important aim: to give aid, guidance and support to the families and loved ones of those suffering with addiction. It is extremely readable and the layout is easy on the eye, with the book being divided into five different parts, with seven or eight chapters in each part, and a helpful overview at the end. This all makes it a very good tool for diving in and out of, to find the information you need, without necessarily reading it from cover to cover, although I would recommend that you do. It's difficult to pick out favourite chapters, there are so many of them I learned much from. The short chapter in part one entitled 'Why do we all take drugs?' talks about the ability of drugs and alcohol to increase pleasure and decrease pain, and how this fills our need for instant gratification. So obvious when you see it on the page, but not so in real life, how many of us actually have ever stopped to think about why we do what we do. I know I never did. Chapter five goes on to talk about the different stages of addiction; from 'use' to 'abuse' to 'addiction'. It describes signs that may become apparent to family or friends when the user moves through these different stages. Changes in attitude of the person concerned, the substance of choice becoming more important to the user, and problems occurring at work or at home or even with the law. One of the common misconceptions of the addict is that nobody knows about their problem, it's their secret. This chapter clearly shows that the user starts to show outward signs of their problem to others, long before they realize it themselves. My favourite part of this remarkable book is the section on Questions and Answers with Joe, Brilliantly done, with some of the answers, those about whether or not addiction is a willpower problem, or if relapse means failure, requiring a paragraph or two to answer, and some, notably those about whether or not it's a good idea to use weed when in recovery from other substances, just requiring a simple but emphatic 'No'! Towards the end of the book there is a chapter entitled 'Real Stories, Real People', which tell the moving real life tales of people suffering with addictions, and the struggle of those loved ones around them trying to help. This section contains the story of the authors' wife Judy (who also writes the foreword at the beginning of the book), and the problems she had with alcohol in her past. This part of the book, along with the question and answer chapter definitely come under the heading of 'essential reading'.
Denise_Spooner More than 1 year ago
"Why Don't They Just Quit" is an astounding book written by Joe Herzanek that is a complete encyclopedia containing knowledge, personal insight and exhausted discussion for families and friends in need of hope, education and truth regarding addiction and recovery. His DVD Round table Discussion consists of 90 minutes within four sessions dealing with "Life Before Recovery, Dispelling Myths, All About Treatment and Life in Recovery." Over thirty-five tough questions are explained and answered including "what works, what doesn't and why, why a person does not have to hit rock bottom, why effective intervention doesn't have to be a surprise" attack and many more. There is also a DVD with the 10 toughest questions answered and is a wealth of knowledge for anyone. Of all the educational material I have scoured and devoured over the past eight months, nothing has been as exhaustive in truth and information as "Why Don't They Just Quit!" After reading the book, watching the "DVD Round table Discussion" and to the answers to some of the tough questions asked by family and friends I am convinced "Why Don't They Just Quit" will leave you informed, educated and at peace about what to do next to help your loved one or friend. Joe Herzanak, the author of "Why Can't They Just Quit", is also a recovering addict and has been a counselor for over twenty years. He is one of the most reliable and reputable sources to gain keen insight, absolute truth and invaluable help as you walk this journey of recovery with your family member or friend. I have experienced the journey of addiction and substance abuse alongside a close family member and have found Joe Herzanek's book and DVD's to be helpful, comforting and empowering. Knowing the truth about addiction and substance abuse is of utmost importance in order to lend a helping hand without enabling, offer advice that is both truthful and can be highly effective in the life of the addict and can bring peace to your soul as you witness the life of someone you know being changed dramatically by drug addiction or substance abuse. Joe Herzanek tells us "Addiction only gets worse." No household should be without this life-changing literature. I firmly believe "Why Can't They Just Quit! along with the DVD series can possibly save the life of your loved one or friend. Comment
REEVBAR More than 1 year ago
Addiction is often described as insidious which means that it spreads in a subtle manner and entraps in a seductive way. Because of this insidiousness, the addict is usually the last one to realize he or she has a problem. And realizing there is a problem is only half the battle. It's hard for most addicts to quit because they don't want to stop all use. They still want to use a little, they're still under the illusion that they have some control left. For example, they may think it's OK to continue smoking marijuana because they "never had a problem with weed." But the drug is not the problem. The inability to enjoy life without a substance is the problem. "Why Don't They Just Quit?" by Joe Herzanek offers many original insights into the insidiousness of this disease. I wish I had read a book like this when I made my first attempts to quit. And I wish my friends and family had read it too. I felt all alone in my struggle with my addiction because no one around me, including myself, understood it. So I was all by myself and an addict all by himself is in bad company. Joe examines many other issues that I haven't read in a book like this before. There's a chapter on hepatitis C, and he looks at the difference between an addict with a crime problem (me) and a criminal with a drug problem (not me). There is a big difference. Trust me. He also looks at what treatment is like for the addict and the family. I'm sure there are many ways besides the 12 steps to quit, but an addict can die trying to find them. As Joe points out, A recovering person can walk into an AA (or NA) meeting anywhere in the world and instantly be accepted by a room full of strangers. This book was written from much hard won experience. Joe himself is a recovering addict and has worked in the criminal justice system for more than sixteen years as a counselor and chaplain. "Why Don't They Just Quit?" is perfect for friends and families of addicts because Joe has also had to deal with this disease from a father's perspective. His own son found himself deep in trouble and luckily Joe knew how to deal with it correctly. He mixes his own personal experiences in with everything you need to know about addiction and recovery, and therefore avoids becoming just another dry recitation of a bunch of do's and don'ts. Tagged as: alone, diary, insidious, review, struggle, treatment, running away from me Review by David Allan Reeves Author of "Running Away From Me"
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I recently purchased the DVD and book on ¿Why Don¿t They Just Quit¿ by Joe Herzanek. Having a son with a severe alcohol/drug abuse problem, who has been through more than one treatment program, I was desperately looking for answers, not hype or glitter. I consider ¿Why Don¿t They Just Quit¿ to be my ¿Bible¿ on drug abuse issues affecting the addict and the families (I loaned it to my son¿s father and it looks like my Bible¿yellow hi-lights, post it notes, etc, etc.). I refer to it over and over. Mr. Herzanek lays it out in a straightforward way, using his and others¿ personal experiences to clarify the how and why of addiction and recovery. This is a must have tool for anyone that is impacted by a loved one¿s addiction.
momof2KE More than 1 year ago
i found this helpful as a way to look at the problem. it is not a cure, but a tool.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
RunnergirlMg More than 1 year ago
This book is overly simplistic, in fact it reads like a pamphlet. No new information in the book, unless you know absolutely nothing. I feel ripped off!