This book examines some of the psy chological, social, and economic forces that have forced British and American women into roles of either learned help lessness or feminist superwoman. Full- time author and mother Apter argues that today's woman must learn to rec ognize both her expansive and depen dency needs because ``our lives de serve our best shot, not just a series of intelligent defenses.'' She describes a few of the exceptional and privileged, such as Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, who have achieved this kind of balance in their lives. She also dis putes the common wisdom of mother hood as fulfillment in itself and urges women to ``relinquish their position as a unique interpreter and nurturer.'' Recommended for women's studies collections. Suzanne Druehl, Little Rock P.L., Ark.