Winning in the Game of Life; Self-Coaching Secrets for Success

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Hungry for a different kind of winning? According to entrepreneur Tom Gegax, in the game of life, effective self-coaching is the first step to success that encompasses every aspect of life. Gegax should know; he thought he had it all until a three-ring wake-up call of divorce, cancer, and a business in crisis changed his game forever. Through a self-designed program of personal and professional evolution, Gegax recovered and now enjoys a life rich with family, friends, peak ...
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Hungry for a different kind of winning? According to entrepreneur Tom Gegax, in the game of life, effective self-coaching is the first step to success that encompasses every aspect of life. Gegax should know; he thought he had it all until a three-ring wake-up call of divorce, cancer, and a business in crisis changed his game forever. Through a self-designed program of personal and professional evolution, Gegax recovered and now enjoys a life rich with family, friends, peak health, and a thriving company.
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Editorial Reviews

Napra Review
Tom Gegax has a particular talent for making real what others may only imagine.
Publishers Weekly - Publisher's Weekly
Even those who don't buy into Gegax's complete program will get their money's worth out of this ambitious guide to a holistic whole-life makeover from a surprising source: the founder of the Midwest-based Team Tires Plus, a $200 million retail tire chain. When he faced simultaneous crises in his marriage, business and health, Gegax undertook an array of New Age activities (meditation, body work, spirituality grounded in A Course of Miracles) in addition to such traditional practices as psychotherapy, exercise and improving his diet. Seeking answers to his problems with the same determination he used to build his business, he successfully reengineered his life. Challenging his readers to follow his lead, Gegax packs his volume with lessons and his philosophy, along with a plan for developing and integrating all aspects of what he calls the "Inner Team": an individual's physical, intellectual, psychological and spiritual strengths. The sections on finding one's life mission and refining one's personal qualities (e.g., caring, optimism, passion, persistence, discipline, spirituality) to achieve it are among the best, although the spirituality chapter is less clear than others. Gegax smartly synthesizes the work of a wide array of personal development gurus, from Andrew Weil to Daniel Goleman to Marianne Williamson, but he may be too aggressively self-actualized for some readers. Nevertheless, business executives and others who enjoy his competitive tone will find much to think about, especially his advice on time management, selling, communication skills and mentoring. Agent, Kim Witherspoon; major ad/promo; 13-city author tour. (Aug.) Copyright 1999 Cahners Business Information.
Library Journal
Gegax got cancer, got divorced, and got stuck with a failing business--and then turned his life around completely. Here's how he did it.
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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780609603925
  • Publisher: Crown Publishing Group
  • Publication date: 8/10/1999
  • Pages: 318
  • Product dimensions: 6.34 (w) x 9.29 (h) x 1.16 (d)

Meet the Author

Tom Gegax is the founder and head coach (CEO) of Tires Plus Stores, one of the nation's largest independent tire sellers, with 150 locations in nine Midwestern states and $160 million in total 1998 sales. In this unlikely business sector, Gegax has created an innovative corporate culture based on his self-coaching concepts, which include shiatsu massage, meditation, nutrition classes, and a feng shui-designed headquarters. He serves on the boards of Deepak Chopra's worldwide organization and EarthSave International, among others. He lives in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
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Read an Excerpt

Determine Your Mission

Success. Arguably the most sought after and least understood prize in America. Many hunger for it, and some never realize when they've got it. Most of us want to be successful human beings, mates, parents, workers, managers, homemakers, salespeople. To achieve it, many work their nails bloody logging long hours and packing more activity into already bloated schedules.
Yet it's startling to consider that while this effort may yield some of the usual trappings, many still don't feel successful. Underneath the satisfaction of good performance reviews, a bigger house, and committee memberships, many still feel that success is somewhere out there yet to be snared.
No wonder. Our eyes are bleary from reading business-success tomes and taking notes at "achievement" seminars. Still, we're left asking the same questions: What makes us tick? What makes us sick? What drives us? While the average American works more hours than ever, little of the effort actually helps us understand anything about ourselves. Crowded out by the often manic push for success, simple, reflective inquiry rarely hits anyone's radar screen.
Many of us are encouraged to train our attention outward, toward such linear concepts as the latest managerial trend, and toward consuming and producing on time, on trend, and in step. We're often so concerned with learning how to manage others--employees, children, mates, even friends--that we're left with little energy to manage ourselves. Obsessed with mastering the world around us, weoften fail to notice the unexplored world within. As French author Édouard Schuré writes, "Modern man seeks pleasure without happiness, happiness without knowledge, and knowledge without wisdom." Meanwhile, the search goes on for the secret to success, as if there were a single pill that would make all the difference.
In my experience, there is no magic bullet. Success, however, is forever within reach, personal and professional growth evolving hand in hand through a winning life game plan. This "whole person" approach focuses on every aspect of our being to support a well-lived personal and professional life. Every aspect is a player and every player is necessary. No one need be left on the bench. Recognizing that a win-lose dichotomy only fragments your mission, this winning life game plan redefines "winning" into a venture of cooperation and integration. Win-lose evolves into win-win. Everyone and everything benefits.
This integrated approach is a path to success, but what kind of "success" are we talking about? This life game plan isn't just about making more money, ascending the corporate ladder, or cramming in one more goal in the name of efficiency. That narrow view of what constitutes success stands between us and deeper satisfaction. With our eyes locked only on the prize, we forget that a winning life is a product of how we play the game.
Success, like a jewel, has many facets, and it can be easy to focus on two of the most eye-catching: money and career. Important? Sure, polishing those are part of the plan. Turn the jewel in your hand, though, and take a look at all the other glints of well-rounded success: loving relationships, community consciousness, physical and psychological health, intellectual balance, spiritual connection--to name just a few. An effective life plan polishes them all. While no single facet defines success, the sum reflects a life well-lived.

Creating a Winning Life Game Plan
This winning life game plan starts by showing you how to tap your inherent wisdom, desires, and values to discover your life's compass: your personal mission. Compass in hand, the plan then combines theory and practical skills to show you the key plays and the support systems you can develop to coach yourself toward your mission--the bedrock of your success.
After determining your mission in chapter 1, chapter 2 shows you how to transform it into practical action plans and how to support it with time-competency, a crucial skill in our ever-changing, round-the-clock world. Chapter 3 zooms in on six distinctive traits I call "COPPSS"--caring, optimism, persistence, passion, systems-discipline, and spirit-filled behavior--that put our action plans into play.
Chapters 4, 5, and 6 explore key plays to support and nurture body, intellect, psyche, spirit--what I call the "Inner Team." In harmony, they produce unmatched energy, clarity of mind, and tranquillity. In the process, you'll learn how to get out of ruts (old habits that no longer contribute to what you want) and into grooves (habits that promote what you want). Standing on the shoulders of wellness, you begin to see beyond what may be blocking your path--fears, unfulfilling relationships and careers, narrow ideas, or egotism.        
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Table of Contents

Foreword...or, more appropriately, Forward! xi
Preface xiii
Acknowledgments xv
1. Determine Your Mission 1
Creating a Winning Life Game Plan 2
What is Self Coaching? 4
The Drive to Thrive 5
Elements of a Winning Life Game Plan 11
Determine Your Mission 17
2. Seven Take-Action Steps to Manifest Your Mission 24
1. Decide What You Want to Give and Get 28
2. Create Action Plans 33
3. Integrate the Plan 34
4. Get Organized 37
5. Be Time Wise 38
6. Just Do It 49
7. Let Go 51
3. Six Traits for the Trip 53
1. Caring 55
2. Optimistic 63
3. Passionate 69
4. Persistent 72
5. Systems-Disciplined 77
6. Spirit-Filled 78
4. Fit for Your Mission: Physical Wellness 90
Tapping the Source of Whole-Person Wellness 92
Fuel Yourself with Food 101
Fuel Yourself with Water 116
Fuel Yourself with Air 117
Exercise 120
Sleep 126
Supportive Bodywork 129
5. Fit for Your Mission: Wellness of Intellect and Psyche 134
The Healthy Intellect 134
Tackling Overload 136
Passion of the Intellect 137
Shhh...I Can't Hear Myself Think! 140
Care and Feeding of the Intellect 141
The Healthy Psyche 143
Sources of Psyche 145
Roadblocks to Self-Discovery 147
Explorations: In Touch with Your Psyche 154
Eight Key Plays for Coaching the Psychological Self 158
Negotiating Negatives 167
Psyche at Work 174
6. Fit for Your Mission: Spiritual Wellness 177
On Assignment 179
Getting Past the Roadblocks 179
Eight Key Plays for Spiritual Practice 187
Time for Spirit 196
The Real Game 198
Time for Inner Team Wellness 201
7. Ten Lessons for Lifetime Learning 204
1. Who, Me? 209
2. Experience: Your Best Teacher 210
3. Peers of a Feather 211
4. Mining Mentor Gold 214
5. Lessons from Our Youngers 218
6. Modeling Success 219
7. Columbo-Curious 220
8. Your Talk-Listen Ratio 221
9. Study Your Team's Playbook 222
10. Tap Outside Resources 223
8. No Failure to Communicate 225
Four Inside Moves for Mutually Fulfilling Relationships 228
Eight Magical Phrases 238
Listen Up 241
Speak Up 243
The Ethical Sell (No, It's Not an Oxymoron) 248
Coming Through Loud and Clear 256
9. Relationship Circles 258
Self: Knowing Someone in There Cares 260
Your Career: A Diamond in the Rough? 261
Money Matters 267
That Wonderful Thing Called Love 275
Children: Parenting the Next Generation 280
Parents and Elders: The Generation Ahead 290
Friends Old and New 295
Close-Knitting Your Community 296
Earth: A Friend in Need 298
The Universe and Beyond 300
Additional Acknowledgments 303
Resources 305
Bibliography 311
Index 315
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Customer Reviews

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Sort by: Showing all of 2 Customer Reviews
  • Anonymous

    Posted October 19, 2001

    Generic, Warmed Up Mush

    If you didn't know better, the book would possibly provide insights on coaching and forward thinking management style. The book is nothing but slapped together ideas liberated from countless of other sources. Since the book came out, he sold his company and put a hundred or so people out of work. If that is an example of self-coaching, I don't want any part of it. A true waste of time.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 17, 1999

    Meandering Thoughts.

    This book reads like a 'term paper' for the final session with his psychiatrist. I'm not sure this is a strategy as much as meandering thoughts on his belief system. The businesses-focused suggestions presented here have been around the block a few times. Not much new.

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