All I Want for Christmas Is a Vampire (Love at Stake Series #5)

All I Want for Christmas Is a Vampire (Love at Stake Series #5)

by Kerrelyn Sparks

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Toni Davis's Christmas wish list

1. Springing my best friend from the psych ward.

2. Living somewhere that doesn't have coffins in the basement. Occupied coffins.

3. Finding Mr. Right. Please make him tall, dark, handsome, and alive.

This Christmas isn't so merry for Toni. Her best friend's been locked up in a mental hospital ever since she told the police she was attacked by vampires, and the only way for Toni to get her out is to prove that bloodsuckers really do exist. So she's taken a job as a bodyguard for the Undead, but she gets more than she bargained for, especially when she meets Ian MacPhie, a Scottish rascal looking for Ms. Right.

Although Ian's nearly five centuries old, he looks and acts like a twenty-seven-year-old hunk.

How can a dead man be so damn sexy? Could Mr. Wrong be Mr. Right? One forbidden kiss could lead to an eternity of passion—and all it takes is one moment under the mistletoe . . .

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780061118463
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Publication date: 10/28/2008
Series: Love at Stake Series , #5
Pages: 384
Sales rank: 434,159
Product dimensions: 4.16(w) x 6.66(h) x 1.07(d)

About the Author

Kerrelyn Sparks is the bestselling author of the Love at Stake series, which has hit as high as number 5 on the New York Times list and 22 on the USA Today list. Kerrelyn is honored that her band of merry vampires and shifters is spreading love and laughter worldwide in fourteen different languages.

Read an Excerpt

All I Want for Christmas Is a Vampire

Chapter One

The air hummed with bass guitar and rampant lust. He'd come to the right place.

Ian MacPhie strode across the renovated warehouse, his steps falling into rhythm with the pounding drums. The Horny Devils was the best place he could think of for finding a woman. The nightclub was teeming with them. All lovely and all Vamps.

Bright red and blue laser lights zipped here and there, highlighting the ladies' scantily dressed, bouncing bodies as they danced close to the stage. They surged in time with the pounding music like a wild sea at high tide, and he was sucked toward them in a greedy undertow.

One of the red lights zoomed past him, flashing in his face and blinding him for a few seconds. A burst of panic shot through him. What if none of these ladies found him attractive? What if he'd suffered twelve days of agonizing pain to look older and . . . ugly?

As a Vamp he couldn't see his new face in a mirror. He'd appeared in a few digital photos at Jean-Luc's wedding, or he thought he had. He hadn't recognized the strange man in the pictures. Heather had assured him he looked good, but she'd been such a happy bride, she'd thought everything was beautiful that day.

As Ian's vision readjusted, he realized his moment of panic didn't matter. None of the ladies were looking at him. They all faced the stage, their gazes riveted on the male dancer who strutted down the runway with an Indian warbonnet on his head. The war paint on his hairless chest depicted an arrow that pointed south where a bunch of strategically placed eagle feathers hid his wampum.

Ian took a deep breath andassessed the situation. True, the ladies hadn't noticed him, but he hadn't really tried to get their attention yet. These lassies were certainly in a lusty mood, so his chances were good. Time to put his new face to the test.

He eased into the crowd. Now what should he say? Jean-Luc had successfully courted Heather using charm and wit. He'd give that a try. "Good evening, ladies."

The roar of the music was so loud, only two lady Vamps heard him. They turned their heads and boldly inspected him.

"Not bad," one of them yelled at the other.

Ian gave them what he hoped was a charming smile, though it faltered a bit when he noticed the second girl was wearing black lipstick. He supposed the modern lassies considered that attractive, but it gave him flashbacks of the bubonic plague.

"Nice kilt," the black-lipped girl yelled. "Cute knees."

"Aren't you a dancer?" the first girl shouted.

"Nay. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Ian Mac..."

"Oh, I thought your kilt was a costume!" The first girl laughed. "Do you seriously dress like that?"

The black-lipped girl joined in on the laughter.

"We need to see more than your cute knees!"

Ian hesitated. He needed a witty, charming response. "I'm sure that could be arranged."

Unfortunately, his attempt at flirtatious banter went unnoticed. A sudden surge of high-pitched screams distracted the two girls, and they turned back to the stage. Feathers were flying, and the crowd of women bounced up and down, determined to catch a feathered souvenir."Begging yer pardon." Ian tried to regain the two girls' attention. "Could I buy you a drink?"

"That one's mine!" The black-lipped girl shoved the other girl to the side so she could nab a feather.

Ian stepped back, dismayed at how the ladies were pushing each other. He glanced at the stage and gulped. By all the saints, the women had plucked the dancer like a chicken. These modern lassies were more aggressive than he'd realized. When it came to finding his mate, he had assumed he would do the hunting.

Ian moved back to keep from getting jostled by the frantic feather-grabbing women. Perhaps it was a matter of timing. Aye, timing was very important when hunting prey. He would sit back and wait for the right moment. Sooner or later, the dancers would have to take a break, and maybe then the ladies would be more easily impressed.

And while he waited, he'd fortify his nerves with a stiff drink. He strode toward the bar. He had it all figured out. He was searching for a girl who was honest, loyal, pretty, and intelligent. In that order. And of course she would need to be madly in love with him.

That last part was a little tricky. How did he go about making the perfect girl fall in love with him? He doubted his alleged cute knees would be enough.

The female bartender had a phone to one ear and her hand pressed to the other to muffle the loud music. "Sure, I'll keep talking. So you're from California? Land sakes, that's far away."

Two young ladies materialized beside her. They'd used the sound of the bartender's voice as a beacon to help them teleport to the right location.

"Welcome to the Horny Devils." The bartender smiled as she hung up her phone. "What would you like to drink?"

"Two Blood Lites," one of the California girls ordered. She snapped her sparkly rhinestone-covered cell phone shut, then dropped it into her shiny handbag.

The second girl pointed toward the stage. "Oh my God, he's so hot!"

The girls forgot all about their drinks as they scampered toward the stage.

Ian lifted a hand in greeting. "Good evening, ladies."

They passed him by, their gazes glued to the dancing Indian, who was down to his last two feathers.

Ian sighed. What was the world coming to when a man with honorable intentions had to compete with a male stripper? How could he impress these modern lassies? Maybe Vanda could advise him. With her purple spiky hair and spandex clothing, she'd become a very modern woman. And a very successful one since Vamps were teleporting from the West Coast to come to her club.

All I Want for Christmas Is a Vampire
. Copyright © by Kerrelyn Sparks. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.

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All I Want for Christmas Is a Vampire 4.5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 380 reviews.
songbirdsue More than 1 year ago
I enjoyed the story and all of the twists in it. It has some vampire lore that I like such as teleportation, mind control and levitation as well as some shape shifting. I really liked the Super Woman aspect that develops in the end. It is about a Vampire who is looking for a vampire wife and a human woman who is hired to guard the vamps during the day and does not like vampires very much. They of course fall in love and change their minds about who they want to spend their life (or undead life) with. The characters are strong and determined. There are two sections of explicit sex and some crude language and innuendos. Definitely for an adult audience only.
judiOH More than 1 year ago
paranormal! the vamps are good guys trying to protect mortals from the bad malcontents. in their quest for success, they find love and romance, sometimes with a mortal. there is never a dull moment in a book by kerrelyn sparks' 'love at stake' series. once open the book and start to read, you are hooked.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Rachel renee
BeguileThySorrow on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
like Ian's story the best so far :)
honeydew69862004 on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
All I Wand For Christmas Is A Vampire is the story of Ian one of the highland guards and Toni the newest daytime guard. Ian is looking for a female vamp to be his true love. Toni is undercover doing security trying to find evidence that vampires are real. Along the way it fallows the same pattern as the rest of the series but it is also hillarious at parts.
pacey1927 on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
The fifth volume in the "Love At Stake" series finds a newly aged Ian McPhie looking for for a vampire of his own to love. He has put a personal ad online and the vampire women are flocking to him. But even though Ian has always wanted to hook up with a vampire woman, he finds himself strongly attracted to mortal and new security guard Toni. Toni has secrets. Her best friend was recently attacked by vampires and is in a mental hospital. When Toni went in search of the bad vampires, she gets attacked as well. Saved by one of the good vamps, Toni finds herself being won over by this group of vampires who only drink synthetic blood. Can she save her friend from the hospital and still persue a relationship with Ian? This is probably the best in the "Love at Stake" series, after the first one. "How to Marry A Millionaire Vampire" is still the best vampire romance I have read to date. The volumes between the first and the fourth made me leery of the series because they seemed to follow the romantic formula too much. But I find that Sparks is adding new characters, adding new paranormals, and making a twisted enemy in the Malcontents or 'bad vampires'. I love urban fantasy and dark paranormal stories. I find no reason why a romance can't add some of the qualities you find in the 'darker' genres to mix it up a little, and still stay a romance story. The bits of humor here still work nicely. The biggest fault that Ms. Spark's stories have is that her character's have these great, different personalities but once she make them the "lead" character, they tend to seem just like all the other previous "Lead" characters. They lose some of what made them unique in the previous books. If she could overcome this one complaint, I think this would make it an even better series.
jjmachshev on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
Reviewed for; book release Nov08Humor and romance with just the right amount of heat, that would be my short description of ¿All I Want for Christmas is a Vampire¿ by Kerrelyn Sparks. This book is part of her `Love at Stake¿ series about vampires in the modern world and I think the series has improved with each book she¿s written. They¿re certainly not `serious reads¿, but if you¿re looking for a book that will leave you with a grin, this is a good series to try.Toni is a woman on a mission. Her best friend and soul sister is currently incarcerated in a psych ward. She was attacked by vampires but nobody (including Toni at first) believed her. Well, being the great friend she is, Toni sets out to prove the existence of vampires. When she herself is attacked by `bad¿ vampires and then saved by a `good¿ vampire (although she really can¿t believe there is such a thing as a good vampire), she becomes a believer. She even goes so far as to become a daytime bodyguard for the sleeping vamps! Now if she can just find some proof, she can spring her friend and go back to her normal life. Ian is nearly 500 years old, but until recently he has resembled the 15-year-old lad he was when he became a vampire. When his boss invented a `stay-awake¿ drug for vamps, an unintended side effect was aging one year for every day a vamp spent on the drug. While most vamps would shudder in horror, this was a dream come true for Ian who is truly tired of all the consequences of looking like a youngster. He¿s ready to find his true love and settle down for an eternity of wedded bliss, with a vampire that is. Because there¿s no way his true love could be a human¿right?What a pair! Toni is having a hard time getting over her vicious attack. How could she ever be attracted to a vampire? And poor Ian with his 15th century values can¿t believe he¿s having such a hard time finding THE vamp for him. He¿s so drawn to Toni who has all the qualities he¿s looking for in a woman¿except she¿s alive. `Watching¿ these two come together is better than any soap opera. Ian¿s efforts at wooing will have you in stitches. Especially once his friend helps him out by putting his information in an online dating service! Hilarity ensues. But these two are actually perfect for each other. They just need to get over their prejudices and realize that there are good and bad in every race and every situation¿finding the good just takes more work. Too true.There are really only two things that relate to the Christmas referenced in the title, other than the time of year the book is set. A party full of male vamps in Santa suits is one, and I don¿t want to give away the other although it will have you saying, ¿Awww, that¿s so sweet.¿ Probably one of the most creative uses of Santa and Christmas I¿ve read in a humorous romance.¿All I Want for Christmas is a Vampire¿ is a book to read on a cold day, beside a warm fire, with a glass of your favorite beverage by your side. The heat generated by this pair of lovers will warm you up a bit, and the interplay between them will keep you laughing. Kerrelyn Sparks will give you a few hours of escape from your holiday chores with this sparkling tale.
vampiregirl76 on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
This is the 5th book in the series. So, far I have enjoyed reading all of the books in the series. The author writes really fun and exciting vampires. But so far my favorites have been the Scottish Vamps that run the Security firm in the series. They play a major role in each book, but have only been the hero in two of the books. This one, and Be Still My Vampire Heart. Hopefully more of the Scottish hotties with be featured in future books. If your looking for something fun to read, any of these books would be in that category.
LindaTownsend More than 1 year ago
A racy, entertaining, vampire-fluff escape from your holiday chores! She couldn’t run away from him. She’d be running from her own heart. All I Want for Christmas is a Vampire by Kerrelyn Sparks is a fun paranormal romp perfect for anytime you crave a light festive read. It’s the first book I’ve ever read by this author. Even though it’s the fifth installment in her Love at Stake series, I had no trouble at all enjoying it as a stand alone. This is the story of Scottish vampire Ian MacPhie and Toni Davis. As the story opens, Toni’s best friend is missing. Toni is determined to find her and to clear her name by proving that vampires exist. While searching for evidence, Toni is brutally attacked… by bad vampires…. and then saved by a good vampire presenting her with a quandary. If she exposes the bad vampires, does she also sign a death sentence for the good vampires who have become her friends… including one sweet and sexy kilted warrior who makes her heart race? Ian is nearly five-hundred-years- old, but, until recently, he appeared to be a fifteen-year-old boy as he was young when turned. He desperately desires to love and be loved, but, until now, women wouldn’t take him seriously as he appeared to be a kid. So… he underwent a painful treatment to age him. The results were beyond his expectations, but now he has another problem. How can he find his present-day mate with his fifteenth century values? His friend’s solution was to set him up with an online dating service. Ian’s efforts at wooing will leave you in stitches as the comical drama that results was better than any soap opera. Through it all, Ian only knows that his true love needs to be his own kind, a vampire. So… why is his new human day-time guard the only one that makes his kilt lift? These two are a hoot! Toni despises vampires and Ian believes that there’s no way that a mortal could be his mate. They are each sweet, caring and loyal. At first, I wanted to knock Toni a few times for her prejudices, but, in the end, they were only hurdles that made Ian jump higher. Besides, Toni wasn’t actually prejudiced, she was just innocent and uninformed. I liked both of these characters and, even though I knew from the beginning that love would find a way for them to be together, I thoroughly enjoyed their off-the-wall adventure to reach that inevitable point. I’m still dreaming of a roomful of hunky vampires in Santa suits days after finishing this book. Following please find a few of my favorite quotes from All I Want for Christmas is a Vampire: “Yer skirt invites a man’s attention. I’ve seen handkerchiefs that were bigger.” She swung her handbag over her shoulder. “At least I wear underwear under my skirt.” “I hope they’re nice since everyone is sure to see them.” --- “I doona want to be loved because I’m Undead. No more than ye would want to be rejected for being mortal.” --- Good grief, he’d fallen into his death sleep with a hard-on. Was it possible for a stiff to be that stiff?” All I Want for Christmas is a perfect quick escape read melding humor, heat and romance with holiday celebrations and Scottish vampires. The heat generated by these two will unquestionably warm up readers on a cold day. If you are seeking a racy, entertaining, vampire-fluff escape from your holiday chores, this tale is for you! My full review is published at Reading Between the Wines Book Club. Please check it out there!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
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excitement, fantasy and romance combine to make this a great read.
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This is a story about a vampire and a human girl falling in love with each other after she starts working as a daytime guard for a group of vampires called the Vamps, after she was attacked by another group of vampires called the True Ones. Wouldn't that be a very complicated love story?
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bvb1029 More than 1 year ago
Love it! Easy read, good page turner.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Val1812 More than 1 year ago
When I Picked up her first book I was hooked. Kerrelyn Sparks knows how to keep you reading her book's. She knows how to make you fill like you are in the book with all of her charaters . There is love suspence action and the right amount sex so it doesn't sound like a porn.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I loved this one of my favs out of all them
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I have the entire series is paperback, but when I saw the nook book on sale, I had to snatch it up.