Amateur Hour: Motherhood in Essays and Swear Words

Amateur Hour: Motherhood in Essays and Swear Words

by Kimberly Harrington

Paperback

$15.99
View All Available Formats & Editions
Choose Expedited Shipping at checkout for guaranteed delivery by Wednesday, April 24

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780062838742
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Publication date: 05/01/2018
Pages: 320
Sales rank: 143,334
Product dimensions: 7.80(w) x 5.20(h) x 0.90(d)

About the Author

Kimberly Harrington is a regular contributor to McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, the co-founder and editor of parenting humor site RAZED, and a copywriter and creative director. Her work has appeared in The New YorkerTimothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, and on Medium. She lives in Vermont on purpose.

Table of Contents

First

I Don't Want to Be Dying in Order to Tell You These Things 3

Jobs

Fuck. This. List. 9

Job Description for the Dumbest Job Ever 17

The Super Bowl of Interruptions 23

I Am the One Woman Who Has It All 33

Undone 37

Dear Stay-at-Home Moms and Working Moms, You're Both Right 45

Time-Out

Just What I Wanted, a Whole Twenty-Four Hours of Recognition Once a Year 55

"If Mama Ain't Happy, Ain't Nobody Happy": Revised and Expanded 59

Vows

Tiny Losses 65

If You Love Your Grandparents, Go Visit Them 81

Let's Have the Wedding Later 89

It's Complicated 95

Time-Out

Your Cute Wedding Hashtags Twenty Years Later 105

Kids, It's Time You Knew the Truth-Your Mother Is a Real Piece of Work 107

Showdowns

Overshare 115

Thank You for Including Me on This Meal Train but Unfortunately I'm a Horrible Person 125

Your Participation Trophies Are Bullshit 129

September 17, 2010: The Day I Turned the Car Around 137

The Ghosts of Halloweens Past 147

Time-Out

Radiohead Song or Accurate Description of My Parenting? 155

Are You Sure There Isn't Something Else I Can Do Before the End of the School Year? 157

Schools

The Walls That Define Us 163

Pro/Con: Caving to PTO Bake Sale Pressure 169

The Punching Season 173

Please Don't Get Murdered at School Today 179

I Don't Care If You Go to College 183

Time-Out

What Do You Think of My Son's Senior Picture That Was Shot by Annie Leibovitz? 189

Anne-Marie Slaughter Is My Safe Word 193

Bodies

Who Does That? 201

If You Can Touch It 209

As Young as We'll Ever Be 219

Hot-Ass Chicks 225

Ashes to Ashes 237

Time-Out

Fifty-One Things You Should Never Say to a Mother Ever 251

Is There a Parenting Expert on This Plane? 257

Freedoms

Do You Have Faith in Me? 263

Thirteen with Dudes 269

Just Because You Can, Doesn't Mean You Should 281

Last

You Are All the Joy 289

When I Die 301

Acknowledgments 305

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

See All Customer Reviews