Part-memoir, part-lexicon, this artful inquisition of the terminology surrounding adoption took my breath away. Fierce and eloquent, Karen Pickell handles the delicate material of her own life with searing honesty and precision, while simultaneously calling out the grief, loss, and sense of abandonment that is the reality of adoption. I wish I could have had this beautiful book as my companion and guide as I fought to navigate the anguish and complexities of my own adopted life. An Adoptee Lexicon is a gift; a must-read for anyone touched by adoption, a triumph of love over loss, and a powerful and searing reminder of the redemptive power of truth. —Caitríona Palmer, author of An Affair with My Mother
In An Adoptee Lexicon, Karen Pickell divines not only the terminology of adoption, but words so often taken for granted—sin, child, name, parent, home—in the formation of all our identities, cutting through clichés that impede self-actualization and empathy. That we might not know who we truly are—that we might be wandering “detached from the earth itself, from the world of living things,” as Pickell hauntingly writes—is a truth this book embraces and with which it struggles, in which any reader, regardless of family history, can find kinship. —Christopher Martin, 2018 Georgia Author of the Year in Memoir for This Gladdening Light
Adoptee perspectives are rare treasures in the adoption sector. Karen's insights on common frequently used terms offer a vulnerable glimpse of how these terms impact those who they were intended to help. This text should be read by anyone who frequently utters any of these significant phrases! —Angela Tucker, founder of The Adopted Life LLC and director of post-adoption services at Amara
Successful marketing has created a false narrative of adoption. Brokers facilitating adoption don’t focus on the barbaric pain that lasts a lifetime. Instead, the billion-dollar adoption industry has institutionalized the term “proper adoption language,” which frames adoption through the prism of eager parents. Karen eloquently reveals the impact of “proper adoption language” on those who are at the center of adoption—adoptees. Using her phenomenal writing skill, she brings the reader to inhabit her being. Karen promulgates how the powerful adoption industry's words have shaped adoption while ignoring the voice of the adoptee. A rather large omission in the narrative of adoption, wouldn’t you think? —Leslie Pate Mackinnon, LCSW, therapist, educator, activist, and Baby Scoop Era mother
An Adoptee Lexicon should be read by every adoptee who has ever felt alone. Though many adoptees try not to dwell on it, we also have the space inside of us Karen so aptly describes. Her work speaks to our often ambiguous reality: fit or misfit, embraced or denied, secret or light. We choose to channel our energy related to angst, hurt, and feelings of being misunderstood in a variety of ways. That Karen has chosen to channel hers into writing and self-expression is our fortune. —Betsie Norris, founder/executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland: The Ohio Family Connection and adoptee
Karen offers an insightful and penetrating window into the adoptee experience through her selection and exposition of the charged language in adoption. Adoptees: read this and feel understood. Others: read this to understand the triggering language that permeates the adoption space. —Haley Radke, creator and host of the podcast Adoptees On