Art of Letting Go: The Journey from Separation in Love to Fulfillment in Life

Art of Letting Go: The Journey from Separation in Love to Fulfillment in Life

by Carlino Giampolo


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The breakup of an intimate relationship is certainly one of the most difficult of life’s experiences. For most people, the process of letting go of a person with whom one has been in love is a period of extreme uncertainty and confusion. The Art of Letting Go offers a unique approach to dealing with the pain of separation.

To aid the reader’s comprehension and confidence in this unique catharsis, the author has now included an extensive self-awareness section and an engrossing meditation. The result is a fully-integrated reading experience designed to enlighten and revitalize.

In the self-awareness exercises which accompany each chapter of the text, the reader is offered a series of questions pertinent to the twenty-six themes of the book. These questions enable the reader to probe the meaning of each theme at a very personal level and thus provide the individual reader with a springboard for self-analysis and self-determination.

The “Dynamic Meditation” which makes up the last section of The Art of Letting Go is a remarkable guide to the process of meditation strengthened by visualization. It leads the reader, in the form of a journey, through a peaceful encounter with the blockages which might prevent true liberation. Step by step, the reader is enabled to shed difficulties and to arrive at the harmonious point of self-awakening.

The Art of Letting Go grew out of the author’s personal experiences. The book covers twenty-six aspects of life that must be dealt with if one is to confront successfully the difficulties presented by a separation in love. Those aspects vary from “Self-Image” and “Responsibility” to “Forgiveness” and “The Future.” Each chapter of the book is introduced by an inspirational saying, followed by the author’s commentary and a self-awareness section designed to enable the reader to act immediately upon each category of experience involved in meeting the challenge of the journey to personal fulfillment.

The underlying philosophy of the book has to do with action as the natural outcome of understanding. While the adage “Time heals all wounds” may be of some comfort for people in a distressing situation, it tends ultimately to condition them for remaining in a passive position. In The Art of Letting Go the goal is immediate action as a response to each difficulty presented by the reality of separation. Thus, the author does intend for his book to be a source of information; but it is clearly designed to do more than that: it is meant to spur the reader on to meaningful action.

In essence, what the author achieves in The Art of Letting Go is a balance between the internal and external dimensions involved in his approach to separation. Chapters such as “Autosuggestion” and “Change of Scenery” reflect on this balance of internal and external change. And there is an interconnection between all of the chapters. They support one another. When you learn to face “Responsibility” (the title of another chapter), you learn also to deal with “Acceptance” and to develop the capacity for “Forgiveness.”

For many people, “Love” is the greatest obstacle to letting go. But Giampolo’s book demonstrates how it must be understood that once we let go, the love which we originally felt is now of a different nature. Love is the primary force which leads us into a relationship and it is also the primary force for leading us successfully out of a relationship. It is learning how to change the form of love which offers the individual the power to transcend suffering and to begin on the path to fulfillment in life.

Because the book is centered around such a universal perception of the nature of love, it lends itself extremely well to a very wide spectrum of readers. Its appeal to experienced adults is of course obvious. For this group it makes an excellent and inspiring gift, for friends and family members alike. But the book is capable of reaching and changing teenagers as well. Parents will find that The Art of Letting Go can offer their children a kind of insight which is lacking in their classroom education. And in the sensitive and experimental years of young adulthood, the message of a book such as this is of inestimable value.

Just as Giampolo has achieved in his book the balance between the internal and external dimensions of getting through a breakup, he has also created a text which functions as a dual learning process. When you learn to let go, you are also learning to be better prepared for the next relationship. This is because the goals taught in this process overlap with the developing of new relationships. This is particularly evident in chapters such as “Communication,” “Feelings,” “Trust,” and “Freedom.”

The result of Giampolo’s conviction is an outstanding book which speaks with remarkable sincerity and clarity to an audience of the most varied background and ages. The Art of Letting Go, to put it simply, is a book to be savored, used, and shared.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780937827055
Publisher: Carlino & Company
Publication date: 06/28/2000
Pages: 132
Product dimensions: 5.07(w) x 8.07(h) x 0.34(d)

Read an Excerpt

From the Introduction:

Letting go of a loved one means moving from a period of relative security into one which demands the redefining of an individuals place and purpose in life. This is a painful yet necessary process. The transition involves coming to terms with two dimensions of challenge: the private reevaluation of self and the mode of interacting with others. In the private realm, an individual reflects upon the nature of personal resources with which to live through the suffering involved with separation. Once a healthy attitude towards the situation has been established, the stage is set for embracing daily experiences with the confidence and strength upon which a meaningful life can be built.

The confusion which accompanies the pain of a separation is one of the main impediments to resolving the dilemma of people in the process of letting go of a loved one. This confusion is, of course, characterized by unique circumstances which relate to individual situations. The essence of the experience of separation is, however, universal. What follows on these pages is a journey through those areas of concern which all separations have in common. The reader’s sincere reflection upon those realities which touch on all love separations can provide what is needed for every individual’s liberation.

Why did you enter into the relationship with the person from whom you are now separating?
What did you expect to get from the relationship?
What is the specific pain you are feeling now?
Is that pain related to what you expected to get from the relationship?
What do you want in your life now?
Do you honestly expect to let go of all the negativity surrounding your breakup?
How would you describe your desire to let go?
Should your desire to let go weaken, what steps will you take to strengthen your desire?

**************** Love:

Surround yourself with love. Though this may seem to you the most impossible emotion to experience in the first stages following a separation, it is to become your course of action when you realize that love is the key to your control of self and to the door that is opening toward your new reality. Love is what brought you into your relationship and love is the power that will lead you to the meaningful resolution of your situation.

This decision to love must first take effect with reference to yourself and to the person from whom you are separating. You must love yourself for those qualities which brought you into the realm of that other person: your willingness to give of yourself and to take the risk of being hurt. And to love the other person in spite of the pain you are feeling is to allow that person the same freedom you will both need in order to move on. Love is a force that renews us and prepares us for tomorrow. Hatred is a shackle that keeps us tied to the past. Drop the shackles!

The one from whom you have separated will not soon be forgotten, though great distances may separate the two of you. Give the memory of that person the chance to help you by insisting on remembering the beautiful experiences that united you. The painful ones which separated you will need no coaxing from the memory. Turn your anger into love. Tale the qualities you found in the other person and develop them in yourself, use them as a way of better experiencing your love for all the others who are important in your life. After all, those were qualities which brought you into love and they are no less worthy today.

Love has no guilt and no boundaries. In fact, it has no definition. Yes, it is the force which takes us out of ourselves so that we may share ourselves with others. Yet it is also the force that leads us into ourselves, so that we may understand and prepare ourselves for the act of giving. You cannot resolve the bitterness and pain of the separation you are experiencing by continuing to dwell on these feelings. Come alive with the force which is the essence of life itself. You are leaving one relationship, one stop in your journey. There is still a path before you. Walk in love.

How would you describe self-love?
How would you describe unconditional love?
Was your relationship one of unconditional love?
Why do you deserve to be loved?
What are some of the qualities of a loving person?
Which one of those qualities do you want to put into action today?
In what different areas of your life can you express the love you have?

Table of Contents

Love..The key to the control of yourself.
Spiritual Power..The essence of letting go.
Beliefs..The framework for your future.
Forgiveness..Readiness for facing the future.
Trust..The gateway to new relationships.
Self-Image..The core of how others see you.
Responsibility..The cornerstone of a mature approach to reality.
Acceptance..The energy to go forward with your life.
Feelings..Confront them openly and with courage.
Learning..The groundwork for your future decisions.
Thoughts..A measurement of the success you will have.
Friends..Among the greatest blessings of this life.
Activity..Keeps you moving forward.
Change of Scenery..Providing refreshment and inspiration.
Laughter..Your door to happiness.
The Future..An entire world of possibility.
Communication..Frees you from built-up negativity.
Music..An oasis of peace.
Autosuggestion..Linking the subconscious and the conscious.
Strength..Enables you to take charge of your life.
Giving..The very foundation of love.
Viewpoint..Directing events to a successful conclusion.
Thinking..Enlarging your vision of the world.
Fear..Rooted in beliefs that are faulty.
Moment to Moment..Focusing on the present.
Freedom..A fundamental necessity for growth.
A Dynamic Meditation.

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