Awakened Relating: A Guide to Embodying Undivided Love in Intimate Relationships

by Lynn Marie Lumiere MFT

Overview

“Full of wisdom as well as practical guidance about how to bring spiritual illumination into the very heart of our humanness.”
—John Welwood, author of Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships and Journey of the Heart

Our natural state is to love and be loved. From deep within, we’re compelled to seek connection. Yet relationships remain a struggle—even for the most spiritually enlightened among us. Traumatic experiences, insecure attachment, and especially the false but commonly held belief that we are separate, both from each other and from the love we seek, can cause endless problems in relationships. As long as our connections are built on this untruth, lasting love and harmony in relationship will elude us. Awakened Relating can help.

Written by a licensed therapist and pioneer in bringing the most direct teachings of non-duality into the practice of psychotherapy, this book offers practical guidance for improving relationships through “awakened relating”—a more enlightened experience of falling in love, communication, conflict resolution, and sexuality. With examples, guidelines, and experiential inquiries for realizing your true nature, this book will dispel common myths and mistaken beliefs about intimacy and help you cultivate a loving relationship with yourself and others.

Including inspirational stories of people who practice awakened relating in their own lives, this book will show you how to identify, transform, and resolve the deep psychological issues that prevent you from having the harmonious, loving relationships you seek. Now is the time to realize the deep and ever-present love that exists within and all around you.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781684031016
Publisher:	New Harbinger Publications
Publication date:	07/01/2018
Pages:	216
Product dimensions:	6.00(w) x 8.90(h) x 0.70(d)

About the Author

Lynn Marie Lumiere, MFT, is a seasoned psychotherapist with a focus on transforming issues at their source through dissolving the belief in separation that creates and sustains them. She is dedicated to awakening consciousness and meeting life’s challenges as doorways to greater freedom. Her work is sourced in over forty years of dedicated spiritual and psychological exploration, as well as almost thirty years of marriage and practicing psychotherapy. This experience led her to the understanding that no matter what the problem, transformation and freedom from suffering is possible when we tap into the infinite and ever-present source of Love. She has been especially interested in applying this understanding to healing relationships and trauma.

Lynn Marie has been involved in the exploration of non-dual wisdom and psychotherapy since it began in 1998. She is a repeat presenter at the annual Nondual Wisdom and Psychology Conference and the Science and Nonduality (SAND) Conference, and is a contributing author to The Sacred Mirror. Lynn Marie is also coauthor (with John Lumiere-Wins) of The Awakening West. Her primary spiritual teacher is Adyashanti, and she has studied with many other teachers from non-dual, Buddhist, and Hindu traditions. She lives in Grass Valley, CA.

For information about Lynn Marie and events she offers, please visit www.lynnmarielumiere.com. It is her intention to offer support for learning and experiencing awakened relating.

Table of Contents

Preface: An Evolutionary Imperative vii

Introduction 1

Part I Awakening Undivided Love

1 Waking Up from the Dream of Separation: Awakened Relating 13

2 The Most Important Thing: Awakening to the Source of Love 27

3 The Accepting Heart: Awakening Self-Love 43

4 The Madness of the Gods: Falling in Love 55

Part II Awakened Relating in Practice

5 The Challenged Heart: Relational Wounding 67

6 Mending the Wounded Heart: Healing With Awakened Relating 79

7 The Undivided Heart: Awakened Conflict Resolution 93

8 Telling It Like It Is: Awakened Communication 109

9 One Love, Two Bodies: Awakened Sexuality 121

Part III Living Undivided Love Together

10 Living Love: Staying Awake Together 139

11 A Love That Knows No Other: True Intimacy 153

12 Love in Action: Changing Our World Through Awakened Relating 171

Appendix: Additional Stories of Awakened Relating 187

Acknowledgments 197

References 199

Interviews

Lumiere resides in Oakland, CA.

Editorial Reviews

Awakened Relating is based on over forty years of daily, unrelenting commitment by Lynn Marie Lumiere to discover and share the egoless state of non-dual awareness in the midst of intimate relationships, and as a therapist of the highest caliber.... Lynn Marie’s book is perhaps the first to show us, step by step, how couples living in this new millennium can support each other and realize their true non-dual nature in the ultimate wisdom of undivided, invincible love. This book is a watershed in the evolution of contemporary non-dual wisdom.”
—Peter Fenner, PhD, author of the Radiant Mind and Natural Awakening books and courses

Peter Fenner

Using the context of intimate relationship, Lynn Marie invites us to a deep exploration of who we are and how this embodies moment by moment. I love the honesty and vulnerability in which she explores this highly relevant topic. This inquiry and its unfolding is at the cutting edge of spirituality and our human experience. In my view, awakened relating is a necessary step in our evolution that has relevance as to whether or not we survive as a species.”
—Isaac Shapiro, non-dual teacher, and author of It Happens by Itself

Isaac Shapiro

Awakened Relating reveals a new direction for our looking, where we discover love that is already present, that pervades everywhere, that is independent of another, that is available no matter how we’re feeling about our partner, and that is independent of our life circumstances.... Lumiere beautifully points out the one true undivided love that is everlasting, can be interwoven into all our human relationships, contains all the happiness we could ever want, and is delivered fresh each moment of our lives. Awakened Relating is accessible, powerful, and enlightening to read. I couldn’t put this book down and will be recommending it to all my friends and colleagues.”
—Richard Miller, PhD, author of The iRest Program for Healing PTSD

Richard Miller

Awakened Relating is an inspiring and thorough investigation of intimate relationship as a way of embodying our awakened true nature. It is full of wisdom as well as practical guidance about how to bring spiritual illumination into the very heart of our humanness. Highly recommended!”
—John Welwood, author of Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships and Journey of the Heart

John Welwood

This is a wonderful and clear excursion into the inner life of intimacy. Lynn Marie leads us into our true Self, where love is already and always fully alive and ready to be shared. I found her insights profound and immensely comforting.”
—David Richo, author of How to Be an Adult in Relationships

David Richo

Awakened Relating dispels the myth of romantic love and points directly to an awakened way of relating that arises from the recognition of our true nature as Love. Clearly written, deeply insightful, and filled with illuminating interviews and powerful meditative inquiries, this book is a liberating guide to meet the most challenging areas of relationship from the light of Awareness. I highly recommend it!”
—John J. Prendergast, PhD, author of In Touch

John J. Prendergast

Breaking new ground, this wise and eloquent book offers detailed guidance in embodying our radiant, boundless, undivided true nature in the realm of intimate relationships, where relational wounding and unresolved childhood issues may make it challenging to live from the limitless love we know ourselves to be.”
—Stephan Bodian, author of Wake Up Now and Beyond Mindfulness

Stephan Bodian

Lynn Marie Lumiere brings together a clear understanding of initial awakening, psychotherapy, and intimate relationships in this cutting-edge book. Awakening has historically been practiced in monastic settings or as a solo journey. Today awakening is happening in the midst of our everyday lives. So, it is most important to bring openhearted awareness to our intimate relating. Awakened Relating is both an important and timely book that opens the dialogue about awakening and relationships.”
—Loch Kelly, author of Shift into Freedom

Loch Kelly

With clarity, humility, and wisdom, Lynn Marie Lumiere invites the reader into a deep exploration of the undivided and loving Awareness that is at once the source of life and the ultimate healing of our conditioned separation and suffering. The author’s devotion to truth shines through each page as she offers examples from her own life’s journey, her work as a psychotherapist, and meditative inquiries, as well as interviews with individuals and couples who seem to be embodying ‘awakened relating.’ In pointing to that which dissolves separation and has the greatest power to transform our lives, Lynn Marie invites us back home to the Love inherent in our being.”
—Dorothy Hunt, author of Only This! and Leaves from Moon Mountain

Dorothy Hunt

Awakened Relating is a beautifully written, thought-provoking book that sheds light on the myriad ways the discovery of the undivided nature of reality can so radically alter the landscape of our relationships. Through examples from her own relationship and compelling interviews with both clients and teachers she has worked with, Lynn Marie explores how the recognition that we are the very fulfillment, wholeness, and love we’ve historically sought in our relationships frees us up to love more harmoniously, more unreservedly, more openly, and more fearlessly.”
—John Astin, PhD, author of Searching for Rain in a Monsoon

John Astin

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