How to manage the process with grace, joy and good sense.
A practical guide that gives parents and teens the "how-to" information they need to navigate the bar/bat mitzvah process and grow as a family through this experience. For the first time in one book, everyone directly involved offers practical insights into how the process can be made easier and more enjoyable for all. Rabbis, cantors and Jewish educators from the Reform, Conservative and Reconstructionist movements, parents, and even teens speak from their own experience.• What's it all about?• Preparation for Parent and Child• Tutoring, stress, expectations, enjoyment, planning for children with special needs• Negotiating the ceremony and celebration• Designing a creative service, heightening the spiritual exercise, special issues related to divorced and interfaith families, planning a party that neither breaks the bank nor detracts from the inherent spirituality of the event.
|Publisher:||Turner Publishing Company|
|Edition description:||2nd Edition, Revised, Updated, and Expanded|
|Product dimensions:||5.90(w) x 9.10(h) x 2.60(d)|
About the Author
Cantor Helen Leneman's specialty is bar/bat mitzvah education. She has worked as a cantor and a b'nai mitzvah teacher in Los Angeles, Baltimore and the greater Washington, DC, area. For several years she chaired the B’nai Mitzvah Educators Network of CAJE. The Network has over 300 members in the U.S. and abroad. She has a BA from UCLA and an MA in Judaic studies from Hebrew Union College–Jewish Institute of Religion, and studied cantorial liturgy with cantors Allan Michelson (z"l) and William Sharlin. She is the author of Bar/Bat Mitzvah Education: A Sourcebook. She is an associate member of the American Conference of Cantors, and a member of the Society of Biblical Literature. Cantor Leneman directs an outreach program for unaffiliated families who wish to celebrate their children’s becoming bar or bat mitzvah. She lives with her family in Rockville, Maryland.
Rabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin is recognized as one of the most thoughtful Jewish writers and teachers of his generation. He has helped people of all ages find spiritual meaning in both the great and small moments in life.
A noted author whose work has appeared in many publications, including the Wall Street Journal, Reader's Digest and the Congressional Record, Rabbi Salkin is editor of The Modern Men's Torah Commentary: New Insights from Jewish Men on the 54 Weekly Torah PortionsandText Messages: A Torah Commentary for Teens; and author of Being God's Partner: How to Find the Hidden Link Between Spirituality and Your Work, with an introduction by Norman Lear; the best-seller Putting God on the Guest List: How to Reclaim the Spiritual Meaning of Your Child's Bar or Bat Mitzvah; For KidsPutting God on Your Guest List: How to Claim the Spiritual Meaning of Your Bar or Bat Mitzvah and Righteous Gentiles in the Hebrew Bible: Ancient Role Models for Sacred Relationships (all Jewish Lights), among other books.
Rabbi Julie Gordon, MA, director of education at Adat Shalom in Bethesda, Maryland, is author of the popular day school prayerbook B'chol L'vavcha: A Shabbat and Festival Companion. She has over 25 years of professional experience in Jewish education, synagogue life and communal service.
Table of Contents
Acknowledgments xiiiForeword xvRabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin Preface xixRabbi Julie Gordon Introduction xxiCantor Helen Leneman
Section I: What's Bar/Bat Mitzvah All About? 11 Bar/Bat Mitzvah Basic Elements: Start to Finish 3Cantor Helen Leneman2 What Parents Should Know Before the Bar/Bat Mitzvah Ceremony 15Susie Tatarka 3 "Passing" the Bar (or Bat) Mitzvah: Setting Clear and Realistic Expectations for Everyone 21Cantor Marshall Portnoy 4 A Guide for the Perplexed Parent: How to Ask the Right Questions about Preparation 33Cantor Helen Leneman 5 The Parents' Rite of Passage 43Rabbi Susan B. Stone6 Ritual Magic and Family Drama: Finding New Meaning in an Old Story 47Dr. Judith Davis 7 To a Religiously Skeptical Jewish Parent 57Rabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin
Section II: The Family's Perspective 658 Tales from the Home Front: Lessons from Family Experiences 67Cantor Helen Leneman 9 Reflections of a Mother 77Missy Cohen Lavintman 10 Reflections of a Father 83Neal Gendler 11 Post B'nai Mitzvah Thoughts: Teens Reflect 89Norman Lavintman, Maya Jaffe, Jennifer Greenberg, Miriam White 12 The Bat Mitzvah Dress: An Intergenerational Story 97Dr. Nechama Liss-Levinson 13 Journey of One Interfaith Family 103Dr. Donna R. Hart 14 What to Say to Your Child on the Bimah 109Rabbi Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Section III: Essentials and Options for the Service and the Celebration 11915 Designing a Creative Service 121Cantor Helen Leneman 16 Celebrating and Negotiating: Avoiding a Post-Divorce Battle on the Bimah 129Sally Weber 17 Making the Theme Meaningful 139Rabbi Aaron Bergman 18 Do You Need a Party Planner? 145Cantor Helen Leneman 19 Coming of Age: The Significance of Bar/Bat Mitzvah for Interfaith Families 151Joan C. Hawxhurst 20 Celebrating Bar/Bat Mitzvah Successfully as an Interfaith Family 155Lena Romanoff 21 Special Needs Children Speak for Themselves 161
Appendix A: On the Learning PathSelected Resources for Parents 171Dr. Barbara Wachs (z"l)Cantor Helen Leneman Appendix B: Shabbat Morning Service Outline 181Cantor Marshall Portnoy Appendix C: Helpful Hints for Parents of Special Needs Children 83Beverly Weaver Appendix D: Selected Bibliography: Recommended Sources for English Readings 187Cantor Helen Leneman Glossary 189About the Contributors 193