What's the number one reason you don't feel loved or able to give love unconditionally? What if you were given simple tools to overcome this? At times, most of us have felt dissatisfied in relationships due to the core fear of not feeling good enough. In Being Love, author and Life Coach Mark Petroff reveals keys to experiencing real and lasting love-love that overcomes fear, ego patterns, and changing life circumstances. As a result of searching, praying, studying, and coaching all kinds of relationships over many years, he learned successful and universal principles to feel and radiate love.
During his coaching sessions and workshops, and through his own relationships, it became clear that we attract what we are. When we connect with the Divinity within us and shift perceptions and behaviors that seem to limit love, we realize that love isn't something we find; Love is what we become and share.
This book asks powerful questions, gives original ideas to empower your choices, and includes practical exercises that enable you to access inner wisdom and make positive changes. Such ideas, questions, and answers have the potential to free and enhance your relationship with yourself, others, and the higher Power you deem sacred.
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Being Love26 Keys to Experiencing Unconditional Love
By Mark Petroff
iUniverse, Inc.Copyright © 2011 Mark Petroff
All right reserved.
Chapter OneFeel Abundant
"And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work" (2 Cor. 9:8 NIV).
After reading this chapter, hopefully you will sense the incredible and always-available resources of infinite Love—resources designed especially and perfectly for you. You may feel a shift in what you believe is possible and how you receive blessings and take action. If you positively shift what you know and say to be true, you will then notice things to back up your uplifted mindset. In this way, you'll become more resourceful by increasing your ability to access what has always been available to you. Having been on food stamps, having seen an investment account grow from twenty-seven thousand dollars to more than a million dollars in just five months, and having to rebuild my finances after being wiped out (and recover from large debt) three times in the past two decades, this accessing lesson has come back to serve me many times.
In reality, we have all we need right now because of the great "I Am," which is within and all around us. Our job is to hold the vibration that Divinity is generously pouring out to us now from an inexhaustible supply of good. The key is to maintain this frequency with a glad and accepting heart, despite the material circumstances. Conditions change; Divinity's giving doesn't. It may take persistence and focus to actually feel that Divinity knows exactly what and how to give to us plentifully and to overcome distracting doubts, setbacks, and fears. Choosing a state of love and gratitude makes the process easier. Focusing on problems makes it more difficult.
The thoughts and feelings we entertain are like seeds that take root, grow, and bear fruit, so we should be wise about the kind of seeds we plant and how we nurture them. The harvest really begins the moment we align our consciousness with Divinity. The question is: do we persist in this way until the reward is evident?
Many areas of the world live in cultures of competition founded on the belief that there is not enough for everyone and that what is given to another takes away from oneself. The strongest and the brightest strive after seemingly limited supply and leave the leftovers for the less talented. Yet, if you look at substance spiritually, you will recognize that there is plenty for everyone. Supply tends to come from giving unexpected value to others. There are boundless ways to offer value with your presence, skill, creativity, and thoughtfulness. "Give and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over shall men give into your bosom" (Luke 6:38). When we feel prosperous, we'll have more to share with others. If we feel restricted, we will tend not to give.
The nature of all love comes from a boundless Source. There is enough for everyone. Giving to another does not cause you to have less. In fact, giving blesses you and increases your capacity to receive more. One way for you to view prosperity spiritually is by having a plentiful supply to do what you came here to do. If Divinity gave you a soul purpose, don't you think you would also be given all that you need to fulfill that purpose?
All possibility for good exists now and always. When we resonate with divine abundance, we are sending thought waves that align with formless patterns, or spiritual blueprints, out of which unlimited manifestations can be revealed. Even physicists tell us that particles or forms come out of waves of energy, and energy is eternal and inexhaustible. When is the last time you ran out of using the number seven? You didn't, because the number seven is an idea, abundantly available to use anywhere and everywhere all the time. There is an infinite supply of 7s available for accountants, stock brokers, retail workers, and school children alike. When you share an idea with another, it multiplies instead of diminishes. When you share goodness with another, it multiplies too. True abundance never gets depleted, because its source is spiritual, not material.
If this is true for all ideas that benefit others, why are there so many people who seem to be in lack? First, it is important to understand that we do not make abundance; we access abundance. Divinity doesn't lack anything. Abundance exists right here and now, always. The real question is: what prevents us from accessing it? Lack comes from being engrossed in our problems rather than focusing on the resources and action steps available for their solutions. What we focus on or hold in mind tends to dominate our experience. Whether we feel burdened and limited or prosperous and unlimited, we'll tend to experience more of what we predominately feel.
There are other things that may be blocking you from abundance, such as forgetting to access it, believing that it's unavailable to you, refusing to ask for and/or receive help, acting deceitfully, or letting fear blind your vision. These things may make you feel cut off from available resources, and as a result, you will more likely believe you are on your own in a contracting or stagnant situation, unaware that you are part of an ever-expanding universe.
Instead of going unconscious and getting lost in the fear that you are lacking something, remember that you have a generous and divine Caregiver, that you are part of a vast network of people and supply, and that ideas and opportunities are boundless. Integrity and valuable service tend to reveal abundance. Maintaining a knowing conviction that what we have to give will serve others also helps.
Underneath almost every fear is the fear of death—the fear that if we lack something, we may not survive. You may have been tempted to submit to the fear that you will run out of whatever you need and then get sick and die. What a horrible way to live! In nearly every case, fear of death is illusory. If we run short of funds at the end of the month, we're probably not going to die, even though it may feel like it to our ego. Our job is to have compassion for and manage our egos.
Perhaps you have recently found yourself in fear and limitation, trying to get what you seem to lack but with meager results. Instead, choose to allow infinite Love to be at the center of your consciousness. Awaken more fully to the beneficial ideas and resources that are constantly being made available to you. Feel something of the essence of the twenty-third psalm: "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want" (i.e., "I shall not lack anything with such a capable shepherd!"). It is a good shepherd's job to make sure the sheep are protected and well provided for. It is the sheep's job to trust in the shepherd's guidance and ability to supply what the sheep needs. Divinity has an inexhaustible supply available to anyone who exercises a conscious capacity to access and accept its field of Love. Our part is to not block it by holding in mind that which limits us.
Spiritual Resources and Practical Needs
When you are feeling fear or lack, how can you shift to positive expectancy? First, realize that the fullness of divine abundance is present and available at every place in the Universe at the same time, right now and always. Regardless of your circumstances, the field of ever-present Love includes unlimited good, networking, and supply. The entire content of the Internet, with billions of pages of resources, is a small example of this. Spiritual resources and divine energy are infinitely vast and can never be depleted, so focus on Divinity's abundance instead of your seeming lack. Entertain the feeling and certainty that Divinity is working with you and others to orchestrate the fulfillment of your needs and pure desires. Then rest into the feeling that you are presently receiving what you need or asked for in order for you to be your best and to be a blessing to others. Finally, relax about the details of how it will all be worked out. If you're steadfast in your focus and feelings, you will know what to do, when to do it, and how to receive.
Spirit can communicate a single idea to you that can bring you millions of dollars. When I worked at a high school, there was a student who told me that his grandfather was once in the trucking business. He had the kind of work that gave him a limited amount of money, but he was always thinking about how he could improve highway mileage. He received the idea to put a curved wind deflector on the top of the cab of a truck. Results showed that mileage improved significantly. Later he obtained a patent on the idea and thereafter received a royalty for wind deflectors used on trucks throughout the United States and other countries. The huge amount of money he made did not take away from others. Rather, his idea helped them by increasing their mileage and profits, conserving energy, and helping the environment.
Regardless of your current or past life situations, you can decide now to be bountiful in what you believe, how you feel, and the way you take clear action. Imagine how a prosperous person would think, what he or she would focus on, and how he or she would feel, speak, and act in your situation. Accept the opportunity to walk with this same attitude and power, knowing that abundance is already present for you, because it is! By holding the conscious frequency of what is spiritually true, you will be more likely to receive what you need in the way of people, ideas, and supplies to plentifully meet your practical needs. Picture and feel the fulfillment and reality of your prayer-desire. In those feeling-filled moments, you will have experienced something of the realization and joy of your heart's intent, regardless of the physical outcome.
The word abundance comes from the Latin root abundare, meaning to abound. The word rings of expansiveness and describes a powerful state of being. Ways of being that foster abundance include appreciation, generosity, a feeling of worthiness, expectancy, joy, and creativity. These spiritual qualities align us with the natural abundant flow of life, because during moments of expressing such qualities we are supporting life. As a result, we are naturally supported by life and the immeasurable resources of the Universe. Regardless of how our finances, jobs, or social situations look, we can actively embody and express qualities that support life and give value to others. By doing so, we will be more open to receive what best supports us. Many people let their money determine how they feel and how they treat themselves and others. Instead, we can choose to be kind, gracious, and persevering at any time, especially if our bank accounts look low. It's not so much what happens to us but how we respond that makes all the difference.
What if you were to pick one spiritual quality, such as kindness or thankfulness, and practice it unconditionally for a month? Doing this is a resourceful and challenging way to grow spiritually. It can measurably expand your experience from limitation to freedom. Other expansive qualities include open-mindedness, willingness, trust in Divinity's guidance and care, responsiveness, patience, spiritual vision, giving with joy, and purity of purpose.
In relationship with our Source, there is an attitude or posture that puts us in a better position to feel and accept abundance, such as that of a young child who is wholly dependent on his or her parents or caretakers. An untainted, childlike posture includes having humility, trust based on a sense of deserving, willingness to ask and respond, what spiritual masters call "beginners mind," and openness to infinite possibilities of good. You may find these same attitudes critical for you to receive abundance in your approach.
We tend to receive prosperity in proportion to our belief of deserving it together with the expectancy that we will receive it. A key to abundance is to consistently practice shifting our mental state to positive expectation and feelings of deserving. Taking actions without doing this tends to limit our results. Jesus, a master of manifesting, taught that things happen to us according to our faith that they will (Matt. 9:29). He had the multitude sit down in expectancy of receiving a meal before he fed them with what appeared to be a limited supply of food (Matt. 14:15-21). Our actions tend to come from what we believe, and our beliefs are powerfully influenced by the pictures we hold in mind and the feelings we entertain about them. That's where the real work is needed!
In business, abundance tends to come from serving others, bringing them joy, and solving their problems, sometimes in surprisingly pleasurable ways. Every product or service does one or more of these, so to expand your business, feel where you are motivated to benefit others and find out what they desire and need by asking them or doing research. Then design practical and cost-effective ways to solve their problems and give them value. Use the feedback of your results to give them more of what they want and need. If the way you connect with them is done uniquely, authentically, and generously, you will have loyal clients and customers. In personal or business relationships, if you contribute to the success and well-being of others, give them more than is expected, and do so with joy and enthusiasm, you will have prosperous relationships.
When Abundance Happens
Will you be plenteous "someday"? Not really! Prosperity always shows up in the present and not in any other time. The reason why early stages of romance often feel so wonderful is because they have many of the rich qualities of being abundant—positive anticipation, worthiness, appreciation, limitless possibilities, fun, and unselfish motives in giving. If this describes your experience, you may remember that you were so fully engaged in the present that you didn't want to be anywhere else! Has your passion been put on pause? Are your funds in a funk? Then embody the practice of living like an abundantly present partner, fully engaged in the wonder of now, and watch how life responds to you.
Every day is like a fresh canvas, waiting for the vision of the artist. The higher Self within you is the artist of your life, spontaneously preparing you for what you most need to receive and give. For many people, the present is restricted by what happened in the past, and their future view looks like the past, only more so. As an expansive being, you don't have to anticipate that the present will have the same outcome as negative past experiences. Know that the present has new and vast possibilities. Step up to the understanding that you have the capacity to create whatever you have clear intention and commitment about. Choose to release the restrictions of the past, and come into the abundant now—the place where Divinity always resides and where whatever you need is included.
What Hides Abundance?
Living the qualities of abundance will help you keep a clear vision of bountifulness. The converse is also true; there are ways of being that would darken your access to ever-present abundance. Here are a few signs that your abundant view may be getting clouded. Are you regularly complaining, fearful, critical, unthankful, mean, uncaring, or isolated? Are you being a taker instead of a giver in your relationships? Do you have a tendency to be angry, impatient, willful, close-minded, or arrogant? Are you feeling regretful and unworthy for some mistake you made last week, month, or decade? Do you regularly entertain feelings of foreboding or self-doubt? Do your internal and verbal languages reinforce negativity and limitations about the economy (or your own financial abilities), and why you can't do things?
These kinds of mental states haze our ability to see that there is enough right now. We may be convinced that it—whatever it is that needs to happen for us—will not happen. Guess what? If we strongly believe in lack and limitation, lack and limitation will tend to show up in our experiences. In large measure, we get what we see! Do you dwell on the problem or on the anticipation of a solution? Abundant people are certain there is a solution, so they act like a magnet to attract it. They declare what is possible and doable, take massive action, and hold feelings of impending success. Isn't it time to let go of the negativity? The payoffs for holding onto it aren't really that great anyway.
Excerpted from Being Love by Mark Petroff Copyright © 2011 by Mark Petroff. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Chapter 1: Feel Abundant....................1
Chapter 2: Appreciate....................13
Chapter 3: Attract....................22
Chapter 4: Feel Balanced....................31
Chapter 5: Beautify....................42
Chapter 6: Celebrate....................48
Chapter 7: Communicate....................54
Chapter 8: Complete....................64
Chapter 9: Be Courageous....................70
Chapter 10: Feel Empowered....................82
Chapter 11: Forgive....................92
Chapter 12: Receive Guidance....................105
Chapter 13: Heal....................116
Chapter 14: Listen....................127
Chapter 15: Persevere....................138
Chapter 16: Be Present....................147
Chapter 17: Feel Protected....................157
Chapter 18: Purify....................168
Chapter 19: Respect....................176
Chapter 20: Feel Restored....................185
Chapter 21: Share....................196
Chapter 22: Surrender....................205
Chapter 23: Trust....................215
Chapter 24: Understand....................225
Chapter 25: Unify....................234
Chapter 26: Be Willing....................245
About the Author and Ordering....................263
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
Mark dives in with rich and rewarding concepts on love. I was pondering why I had not found my perfect soul mate and he unfolds the answer in a clear concise fashion. In a few paragraphs Mark answered my questions and now I feel empowered. It's easy to see that Mark Petroff teaches from a space of experience. His ideas and concepts are digestible and exciting as well as challenging beliefs that have held me back from abundance and love. I take my book everywhere and everyone who see the cover wants a copy. Being Love is my new best friend.
I received this book as a gift, and I am so glad I did. The words and message of Being Love are so uplifting. After reading this, I feel like I have the keys to be loving with all of the relationships in my life, and to be and live abundantly. There are a lot of practical tips in each chapter about how you can implement loving techniques ¿ towards yourself and others ¿ which I appreciate. Still, I think it is the words themselves help uplift my energy, to just naturally become more loving, listening better, and appreciative of all the people in my life. The author¿s personal stories ¿ from the viewpoint of someone who has been through a lot and has learned the keys to a healthy life and loving relationships ¿ makes me feel like I am hearing from a real person and not from someone who simply has lofty words and ideals. I have read a lot of self-help books, and this one definitely offers me something different. It feels like it comes from an inspired place.
This book was given to me during a time in my life when I was going through a lot of uncertainty and struggle. It reminded me that God ( Divine love, as referenced in the book) is always guiding, protecting, healing, giving, forgiving, and strengthening me. In a way, it reconnected me to my own power and it gave me hope and tools to bring about positive change in my life. It not only helps people who are looking to find or better a relationship, but also gives comfort and thought provoking ideas for other areas of life to.