We live in an age of rapid change and instant communication. We also live in a Culture of Blame and Disrespect, creating a need to manage our responses to high-conflict people. A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere online, social media, in a letter or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors and others anywhere in your life.
BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely, while being reasonable in return.
BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This little book gives over 20 examples of BIFF responses for all areas of lifeplus additional tips to help you deal with high-conflict people anywhere.
This Second Edition includes a new chapter on Coaching for BIFF Responses. Anyone can use this method to help someone else with a BIFF response by asking 10 simple questions to make it even more effective.
Another helpful tool to shift high-conflict people from blaming to problem-solving is So, What's Your Proposal: Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving, also by Bill Eddy.
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq., is a lawyer, therapist, mediator, author, and president of High Conflict Institute. He developed the "high conflict personality" theory and has become an international expert on managing disputes involving high-conflict personalities and personality disorders.
|Publisher:||High Conflict Institute Press|
|Edition description:||Second Edition|
|Product dimensions:||5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x (d)|
About the Author
Bill Eddy is the author of several books about dealing with high-conflict people - the most difficult "difficult" people. Bill is a lawyer, therapist, mediator and the President of the High Conflict Institute. He developed the "High Conflict Personality" theory and has become an expert on managing legal, workplace and other disputes involving high-conflict personalities and personality disorders.
His books include:
It's All Your Fault at Work! Managing Narcissists and Other High-Conflict People
So What's Your Proposal? Shifting High-Conflict People from Blaming to Problem-Solving in 30 Seconds
High Conflict People in Legal Disputes
It’s All YOUR Fault! 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything
BIFF: Quick Responses to High Conflict People, Their Personal Attacks, Hostile Email and Social Media Meltdowns
SPLITTING: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder
He is also the developer of the “New Ways for Work” method of managing potentially high conflict employees in the workplace; and the "New Ways for Families" method of managing potentially high-conflict parents in and out of family court.
A graduate of Case Western Reserve University, San Diego State University, and the University of San Diego School of Law, he lives in San Diego, CA with his wife.
Table of Contents
High-Conflict People and Blamespeak
Writing a BIFF Response
Avoid Admonishments, Advice and Apologies
BIFFs for Friends and Family (and Ex’s)
In the Workplace
Business and Professions
Organizations and Governments
Coaching for BIFF Responses
About the Author