British Men Destroyed my Life: The Travels of an American Gypsy

British Men Destroyed my Life: The Travels of an American Gypsy

by Carmen Vera


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You've always thought about leaving. So why haven't you yet? Our lives are controlled by outside factors that stop us from breaking the vicious cycle of routine. Follow a young naïve American girl who follows her heart by going to meet the love of her life in London, England-thousands of miles away. She quits her job and buys a plane ticket, but things don't end up as planned. What starts as a few words scribbled on the back of a receipt paper in the Czech Republic becomes a story of adventure. Find out what happens to her as she isn't faced with the best outcome.

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781490752358
Publisher: Author Solutions Inc
Publication date: 07/17/2015
Pages: 198
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.45(d)

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British Men Destroyed My Life

The Travels Of An American Gypsy

By Carmen Vera

Trafford Publishing

Copyright © 2015 Carmen Vera
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4907-5235-8


Not All Who Wander Are Lost — J. R. R. Tolkien

[7/22/2010] Josh: Josh has shared contact details with Carmen Vera.
[7/22/2010] Josh: Hi!
[7/22/2010] Josh: I'm Josh
[7/22/2010] Carmen: I'm Carmen
[7/22/2010] *** Call to Josh, duration 04:50:12. ***

* * *

[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Hello
[8/11/2010] Josh: Hi
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Hi
[8/11/2010] Josh: You ok?
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Yeah, are u?
[8/11/2010] Josh: Yea just been so busy lately, sorry we haven't been able to talk.
[8/11/2010] Josh: What about you?
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Yeah
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Same here
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Hope all is well with you :)
[8/11/2010] Josh: It is :)
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: Great. Happy to hear that. :)
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: New tat?
[8/11/2010] Josh: Yep :)
[8/11/2010] Carmen Vera: I want to see!!!
[8/11/2010]*** Call ended, duration 02:10:19 ***

* * *

[9/9/2010] Carmen: Good morning
[9/9/2010] Carmen: What's up?
[9/9/2010] Josh: Just woke up lol you?
[9/9/2010] Carmen: Oh
[9/9/2010] Carmen: I'm sorry
[9/9/2010] Carmen: Goodnight lol
[9/9/2010] Carmen: <3

[9/9/2010]*** Call ended, duration 00:01:12 ***

* * *

[9/30/2010] *** Call to Josh, no answer. ***
[9/30/2010] Josh: You just call me?
[9/30/2010] Carmen: Yes
[9/30/2010] Josh: Sorry, I was in the bath: P
[9/30/2010] Josh: Got my music on then just noticed your name came up lol
[9/30/2010] Carmen: call me back!
[9/30/2010] Josh: Ok, one sec!
[9/30/2010]*** Call to Josh, duration 01:23:09. ***

* * *

[10/2/2010] Carmen: You're coming to visit here soon aren't you?
[10/2/2010] Josh: Maybe. If plans work out.
[10/2/2010] Carmen Vera: I'm going to make it a life goal to visit England one day
[10/2/2010] Carmen Vera: and one of the reasons why is to meet you.
[10/2/2010] Josh: GOOD
[10/2/2010] Josh: Sorted [??]
*** Call ended, duration 1:40:28 ***

[12/3/2010] Carmen: when are you going to go to the University of Georgia?
[12/3/2010] Josh: Next fall maybe
[12/3/2010] Carmen: I hope that happens
[12/3/2010] Carmen: if not
[12/3/2010] Carmen: I can just visit you half way somewhere
[12/3/2010] Carmen: :)
[12/3/2010] Josh: It's an ocean between us
[12/3/2010] Josh: There is no half way, baby
[12/3/2010] Carmen Vera: :(
[12/3/2010] Carmen Vera: um ... maybe ...
[12/3/2010] Josh: Ahh, you look so damn cute when you're thinking
[12/3/2010] *** Call ended, duration 2:20:58 ***

* * *

[01/4/2011] Carmen: Please come to Georgia then
[01/4/2011] Carmen: If not we can meet in France
[01/4/2011] Josh: Paris is romantic. I would love to take you out.
[01/4/2011] Josh: if we meet, it would be more than just physical.
[01/4/2011] *** Call ended, duration 1:45:48 ***
[02/8/2011] Carmen: I'm going through so much lately
[02/8/2011] Josh: what do you mean by that?
[02/8/2011] Carmen Vera: I am changing my major
[02/8/2011] Josh: why?
[02/8/2011] Carmen: I've outgrown it. I want something new. I'm at a crossroad
[02/8/2011] Josh: I know everything will work out for you. Don't worry, babe
[02/8/2011] Carmen: :)
[02/8/2011] *** Call ended, duration 0:30:05 ***

* * *

[04/12/2011] Josh: Live for the moment. You never know. You might have a boyfriend by the time I come over there.
[04/12/2011] Carmen: you think I'll have a boyfriend when you come over here?
[04/12/2011] Josh: by the time I come over you could have met someone. You never know what the future holds.
[04/12/2011] Carmen: I just have a really strange feeling about you
[04/12/2011] Josh: I know
[04/12/2011] Carmen: there's something about us
[04/12/2011] Josh: I'm sure one day we will be something but for now I'm in England and you're in America and I want to make the most of it.
[04/12/2010] *** Call ended, duration 2:11:02 ***

* * *

[03/20/2011] Carmen: when are you coming down here again?
[03/20/2011] Carmen: sometime in 2011 though?
[03/20/2011] Josh: like maybe August
[03/20/2011] Josh: but that maybe depends if this coaching job in Atlanta goes through
[03/20/2011] *** Call ended, duration 3:07:40 ***

* * *

[05/17/2012] Josh: Hey! If you come up next month I'll be moved out here and be living with my parents for 2 months until my university restarts, so you would meet them!
[05/17/2012] Carmen: That'll be great!
[05/17/2012] Josh: well I'm miles and miles away
[05/17/2012] Josh: but I'm here for you waiting.
[05/17/2012] Josh: cool I'll take look at it tomorrow
[05/17/2012] Carmen: Where do I land?
[05/17/2012] Josh: London Heathrow international airport
[05/17/2012] Josh: Well if you come then I'm going to get hotel in London and show you around there
[05/17/2012] Carmen: [??]
[05/17/2012] *** Call ended, duration 3:07:40 ***

* * *

[06/02/2012] Carmen: Hey, so looks like I can't come right now. I don't have enough saved at the moment. I'm sooo sorry.
[06/02/2012] Josh: [??]
[06/02/2012] Carmen: I know, soon though.
[06/02/2012] Josh: [??]
[06/03/2012] Josh: I just sent you the link for Zeitgeist. I know it's something you would enjoy. You like that secular stuff.
[06/03/2012] Josh: it's long so watch it when I go to bed but it's definitely something you'll love
[06/03/2012] Josh: Yep
[06/03/2012] Josh: Well, babe, sleep time
[06/03/2012] Josh: xxxxxxxx
[06/03/2012] Josh: watch the video
[06/03/2012] Josh: Love you! :) Tell me you love me now.
[06/03/2012] Carmen: Hahaha ;)
[06/03/2012] *** Call ended, duration 4:15:10 ***

* * *

[06/10/2012] Josh: Nah, I don't have a dad. Mine passed away like 8 years ago.
[06/10/2012] Josh: I just don't like to talk about it much
[06/10/2012] Carmen: Oh, why not? [??]
[06/10/2012] Josh: Hun, I'd rather not chat about it. Don't want to be getting upset and making you more bummed
[06/10/2012] *** Call ended, duration 2:45:20 ***

* * *

[06/17/2012] Carmen: So where are we going to live together once we finally meet?
[06/17/2012] Josh: California ... by the beach
[06/17/2012] Carmen: I live a few miles away from the beach
[06/17/2012] Carmen: I'll use my savings to help pay for our house!
[06/17/2012] Josh: No, that money is for you
[06/17/2012] Josh: I'll pay for the house
[06/17/2012] Josh: When I finish college the job I'll get job starts at £33.000. Let's not jinx it, but I should be hitting like £130,000 by the time I'm 30.
[06/17/2012] Josh: Ah, Carm
[06/17/2012] Josh: Your money is yours. I'm going to support my wife no other way round
[06/17/2012] Carmen: I'll have my own money too!
[06/17/2012] Josh: I like to spoil my girl :)
[6/17/2012] Josh: and you deserve to be spoiled [??]
[6/17/2012] Josh: but in our house I want one of those houses that has like massive windows
[6/17/2012] Carmen: I love big atriums!
[6/17/2012] Carmen: I'm studying interior design right now too!
[6/17/2012] Josh: [??] Perfect, so you decorate our house
[6/17/2012] Carmen: Yay! [??]
[06/17/2012] *** Call ended, duration 4:46:08 ***

* * *

[06/19/2012] Josh: may sound weird but I actually can't wait for the day I get to be there holding our firstborn
[06/19/2012] Carmen Vera: Let's get married now
[06/19/2012] Carmen Vera: Let's elope
[06/19/2012] Josh: come to England now [??]
[06/19/2012] *** Call ended, duration 3:07:40 ***

* * *

[06/22/2012] Carmen: Send me the link!
[06/22/2012] Josh: this song :) is about how there's that one special person for you.
[06/22/2012] Josh: Our wedding song: P
[06/22/2012] Josh: I learned guitar for this song lol
[06/22/2012] Carmen: please learn it
[06/22/2012] Josh: I learnt
[06/22/2012] Josh: as in I know how
[06/22/2012] Carmen Vera: really?
[06/22/2012] Josh: yes because I wanted to be able play this song for you
[06/22/2012] Carmen Vera: I have a song I want to play for you too
[06/22/2012] Josh: I know you can sing [??]
[06/22/2012] *** Call ended, duration 3:05:23 ***

* * *

[08/17/2012] Carmen: Hey, so what's the news? Can you come visit this winter?
[08/17/2012] Josh: I can't get time off work
[08/17/2012] Carmen: It's been over 2 years, Josh. I don't understand.
[08/17/2012] Josh: We will meet one day, don't worry.
[08/17/2012] *** Call ended, duration 1:22:56 ***

* * *

[01/11/2013] Carmen: I'm going to show up one day and not tell you
[01/11/2013] Carmen: and call I'll say can you pick me up at the airport?
[01/11/2013] Josh: Lmao. I'd secretly love that but same time I want time to plan it so perfect so don't
[01/11/2013] Carmen: really? :)
[01/11/2013] Josh: you're actually beautiful, you know this right?
[01/11/2013] Carmen: what do you mean?
[01/11/2013] Josh: just I don't know I'll actually be so happy with life if we do end up together.
[01/11/2013] Carmen: me too [??]
[01/11/2013] *** Call ended, duration 3:05:23 ***

* * *

[03/05/2013] Carmen: it looks so fun to just travel. I wish I could go somewhere with you.
[03/05/2013] Carmen: I want to go somewhere with waterfalls
[03/05/2013] Josh: I feel like I am falling in love with you, Carm
[03/05/2013] *** Call ended, duration 02:15:03 ***

* * *

[05/11/2013] Josh: Happy birthday, hun!
[05/11/2013] Carmen Vera: thank you! [05/11/2013]
*** Call ended, duration 00:07:11 ***

* * *

[05/17/2013] Carmen: my boss said that I could have time to see you for two weeks!
[05/17/2013] Josh: let me check my vacation time.
[05/17/2013] *** Call ended, duration 00:35:18 ***

* * *

[06/20/2013] Josh: how much to Asia?
[05/19/2013] Josh: it would be good because it's somewhere we both don't know and do the traveler thing
[05/19/2013] Josh: definitely, my mates are traveling around there. It's amazing
[05/19/2013] Josh: next summer hopefully we can meet up.
[05/19/2013] *** Call ended, duration 00:35:18 ***

* * *

[05/21/2013] Josh: Hey, so like now is probably the worst time of the whole year to come. My boss said no.
[05/21/2013] Josh: if this was planned better, then yes. But last minute definitely can't :(
[05/21/2013] Josh: Sorry, babe
[05/21/2013] Josh: I'm definitely going to Thailand next summer so we can meet up and do the whole traveler thing together
[05/21/2013] *** Call ended, duration 01:45:58 ***

* * *

[06/19/2013] Josh: You look so hot babe and I love you.
[06/19/2013] Carmen: :) Haha!
[06/19/2013] Josh: I do babe. Okay seriously g2g now!
[06/19/2013] Josh: We will speak soon, yes?
[06/19/2013] Carmen: yes
[06/19/2013] Josh: :):)
[06/19/2013] Josh: Sorry, I've been busy lately
[06/19/2013] Carmen: text me
[06/19/2013] Josh: xxxxxxxxx
[06/19/2013] Josh: okay, hun! Byeeee x
[06/19/2013] Josh: xxxxxx
[06/19/2013] Josh: xxxxxx
[06/19/2013] Josh: xxxxxx
[06/19/2013] Josh: Love you
[06/19/2013] Josh: :) Guess this is a test of our love. As you should always love me back too!
[06/19/2013] Carmen: [??]
[06/19/2013] Josh: ok seriously serious now bye bye, baby xxxxxxxxx
[06/19/2013] Josh: xxxx love U
[06/19/2013] *** Call ended, duration 02:54:03 ***

* * *

[7/05/2013] Josh: If you come up next month I'll be moved out here and be living with my mom for 2 months until my school restarts, so you would meet her!
[07/05/2013] Josh: lol
[07/05/2013] Carmen: Oh my gosh! Really!? Okay! Where would I stay?
[07/05/2013] Josh: Stay with me ...
[07/05/2013] *** Call ended, duration 00:35:18 ***

* * *

My name is Carmen and this is a chapter in my life.

Josh and I have been talking since 2010. He is beautiful, alluring, and addicting. How is it seemingly possible to — how do I say this without cringing — "love" someone I never met in person?

I suppose I can set up a date for the two of us to meet. That sounds simple enough. A fun day at the beach or the movies would suffice. Wait a second. I think there's a twist coming up. I realize my situation is more complicated than that. I have one minor/slight/teeny-weeny/itsy-bitsy problem. Distance.

I live in Orange County, California. He is in London, England. Five thousand four hundred fifty-five miles away (8,778 kilometers for my international friends). I met Josh randomly online. Harmless. Who knew I'd completely fall for him?

Over the years, we talk about meeting up. We think of the possibility of living in the moment. We simply get up and leave our lives behind and be together. It is a happy thought, and one that I continually dream about.

There are no boundaries during our late-night video conversations. It's not a rare occasion to have them last four to five hours at a time. We talk about anything and everything. We plan to travel to see the world together. That is our ultimate goal.

I want to leave but can't. I never have a reason why though. What a foreign concept this is! It's crazy to think about the things we really want to do in life when you put it into perspective. For some reason, we never actually do them. Our reasoning is always "we can't" and we are somehow satisfied with that answer. I can't understand that, which intrigues me even more.

As of now, I'm a twenty-two-year-old woman working and going to school full time. I make my living at a telecommunications company.

My lifestyle is comfortable due to the good money coming in every other week. Sounds like the dream.

I'll tell the truth now. After years of relentless sales and corporate America, my attention has wavered. Simply put: I am fucking bored of all of it.

My boss is a turd who pushes our store to be one of the top-selling stores through dishonesty and swindling customers. Sure, our numbers look good, but I know our money is through deceit. I come home unhappy each night wanting to cry myself to sleep. I am falling into this depression of boredom, exhaustion, and the worst of all: routine.

As humans, we have the right to do what keeps us sane, no matter the cost. Society put me in this monotonous-structured lifestyle. I'm taught to get a secure job. Now I go to college where I will accumulate insane amounts of debt. I will work until I am too tired to work. That's not the path I want to take in my life.

I owe it to myself to truly enjoy what life has to offer. I won't be here for long. I'm not religious. I will never be by any means. Life doesn't owe me anything. Sad, but true. I'm not responsible for anyone but myself, which means I need to create my own purpose alongside everyone else. The only thing I know to be true is the present moment. If I don't honor this, I will lose what is most important and precious in life: that is my time.

I look in the mirror and ask myself: If I die tomorrow, will I be happy? Could I say I am ready? My answer is a clear: no. I can't lie to myself. I don't want to be on my hospital bed saying that I wish I would have. I want to tell the nurse that I'm ready to "go, surrounded" by people I love.

All I want to do is to leave this world a better place than before I got here even if it is just a little bit. Whether that is through sharing my stories and inspiring people or making them smile for a moment in their day. That's enough for me.

Josh and I should have met by 2011, since he had an interest in attending school in America. Sadly, in 2012, Josh made the decision to attend a school in England, which renegades the choice of him coming to a college in Georgia to where he would be closer to me. A trip to Georgia is more reasonable as opposed to England. Nonetheless, it still doesn't keep us from talking.

I'm the type of girl who wants to do things spontaneously, but never really has the opportunity. I hate the idea that I could be predictable. I never understood why. I love everyday surprises and I want to incorporate them into everyday life as much as possible.

Well, this is my chance.

I come up with the master plan that would ultimately secure my opportunity to leave and get out. Nine months prior to my termination at a company I once had a desire to be promoted in, I save a portion of every paycheck toward traveling. I have to set a goal for myself. That is my secret. I won't get out if I don't. Every day is a little step. Baby steps.

As people, we have much more power than we think we do. We believe we are committed to habit and routine, even when we are not happy. Poison. I'd rather fail at something I actually want to do as opposed to failing at something I never wanted to do in the first place.

* * *

After long exhausting months of saving money and living off instant noodles, I'm able to finally leave. I quit my job. I walk in with my head held high and strut into the manager's office like Beyoncé.

"I'm out of here!" I tell my asshole boss and dance out of the store high-fiving my newly ex-coworkers. Thinking back, I'm relieved. I later find out a few months after, my ex-boss undergoes an investigation with the company's fraudulent department. All the employees at the store were interviewed with their jobs at stake. They too had been involved in fraud due to his strict policies. Nonetheless, he ended up quitting without any prior notice. It looks like things caught up to him, but that's none of my business. Acts as Kermit and sips on black coffee.

* * *

That night I book a flight to London, England. Yes. I just did all from my fingertips. That's all it takes in today's world of technology.

Josh and I don't talk a lot in the few months leading up to my departure since we are both working so much. I thought this might be a nice little surprise for him. Yes, you read that correctly. No, you do not need to get your eyes checked. He does not know I am coming.


Excerpted from British Men Destroyed My Life by Carmen Vera. Copyright © 2015 Carmen Vera. Excerpted by permission of Trafford Publishing.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Table of Contents


1 Not All Who Wander Are Lost, 1,
2 Parliament on Fire England, 15,
3 Handcuffs and Sandwiches Ireland, 22,
4 Let Me Be Your Croissant France, 42,
5 Dutch Fried Chicken Holland, The Netherlands, 49,
6 Your Sexy Holes Germany, 67,
7 Save Our Port Italy, 83,
8 A Groper's Paradise Thailand, 99,
9 Meditation in Motion China, 104,
10 Fancy Pants Kentucky, USA, 106,
11 Sugar and Salt New York, USA, 115,
12 Friendly Neighbors Iceland, 139,
13 I Do and Don't Greece, 143,
14 Bosnian Love Czech Republic, 154,
15 Engraved in My Heart Forever Poland, 167,
16 Home, 177,
17 Chapter Seventeen, 178,
18 Carmen's Thoughts, 179,

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