Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

by Chelsea Handler
4.1 1273

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Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang by Chelsea Handler

WHAT . . . A RIOT!

Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the #1 bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood.

Family moments are fair game, whether it's writing a report on Reaganomics to earn a Cabbage Patch doll, or teaching her father social graces by ordering him to stay indoors. It's open season on her love life, from playing a prank on her boyfriend (using a ravioli, a fake autopsy, and the Santa Monica pier) to adopting a dog so she can snuggle with someone who doesn't talk. And everyone better duck for cover when her beach vacation turns into matchmaking gone wild. Outrageously funny and deliciously wicked, CHELSEA CHELSEA BANG BANG is good good good good!


Being unpopular: "My parents couldn't have been more unreasonable when it came to fads or clothes that weren't purchased at a pharmacy."

Living with her boyfriend: "He's similar to a large toddler, the only difference being he doesn't cry when he wakes up."

Appreciating her brother: "He's a certified public accountant, and I have a real life."

Arm-wrestling a maid of honor: "It wasn't her strength that intimidated me. It was the starry way her eyes focused on me, like Mike Tyson getting ready to feed."

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780446563536
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Publication date: 04/01/2010
Sold by: Hachette Digital, Inc.
Format: NOOK Book
Pages: 256
Sales rank: 172,403
File size: 1 MB

About the Author

Born in Livingston, New Jersey, to a Jewish father and a Mormon mother, Chelsea Handler is the youngest of six children. She is the star and host of E!'s Chelsea Lately.

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Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang 4.1 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 1273 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book was by far the best of the 3 books. I laughed so hard it hurt! I read it in one sitting! The insertion of pictures made it more the better! Chelsea's sense of humor isn't for everyone but if you like her this book is even better!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
It's not very often you come across a book that makes you laugh out loud; not once but over and over throughout the entire book. Leave it to Chelsea Handler to make this happen with Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang, the follow-up to her first two books Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea and My Horizontal Life; all of which have ended up on the New York Times Best Seller List. I knew it was bound to be a great book when the first line of the first page read, "I was eight years old and well into the third grade at Riker Hill Elementary School when I fell head over heels in love with myself." This leads into the story of when she first got "the feeling" and her comical views towards sex and male genitalia. Chelsea also lets readers in on her family and personal life in addition to sharing some of the insanely funny practical jokes she plays at the expense of her friends, boyfriend and staff. Nothing (and no one) is off limits in this hilarious collection of essays. Her diet of Lean Pockets and vodka might play a big role in her boundless sarcasm - or perhaps it comes from growing up with parents who had absolutely no sense of reality. Whatever the reason for the constant slew of profanities and ridiculous humor from Chelsea, we should all be appreciative and reap the benefits by reading this book.
Uptwnrunner407 More than 1 year ago
I can't bring myself to read the last chapter, because I just don't want to finish... it's that good.
marianne68 More than 1 year ago
I have read all Chelsea Handler's books and this one is my favourite.
Ladycloud More than 1 year ago
I was a huge Chelsea fan and tried to never miss a show. After reading books 1 and 2, I was really anticipating book 3 to be her best yet; however, I was wrong. It actually showed me how disfunctional she really is and I didn't find her pranks and antics funny, but found them to be cruel. I am not surprised at all that she and Ted broke up. I bet he is in counseling right now to get him back to normal. I was also disturbed at how badly she treats her friends and family. It seems that all she does all day is scheme on how she will embarrass, humiliate, and degrade everyone around her. I am still a fan of hers, but look at her in a much different light now.
jb70 More than 1 year ago
This book has been on my Paperbackswap wish list for over a year, at that time the local library didn't have a copy yet. This morning on a whim I checked the online catalogue and found out that they now have a copy and it was available so I checked it out. This one was just as funny as Are You There Vodka? It's Me Chelsea. It made me laugh out loud over and over again. My children kept asking me what was funny and none of it was something I could share with them. I am terrible at telling funny stories, because I always end up laughing too hard to actually tell them. I would be like her one friend who had to hide under a desk during a speaker phone call that was a joke about a fake funeral. I would be the person who was ruining the punchline and laughing before the joke was done, so I am impressed by people who can tell and carry off intricate jokes and lie on the fly. I mentioned this in my last review, but I have never seen Chelsea's show. I just checked the listings and it is coming on in a half hour so I am going to check it out. I have a tiny little fear inside that it won't be as funny as her words were to me. I am not a big fan of stand-up comedy and I'm not exactly sure if that is what her act is. I don't want to have my opinion changed, but it is a risk I have to take to try out seeing her live, and really what do I have to lose? I enjoyed the book. I laughed more today than I have all week combined. I wonder if I can count that as exercise? I did run today, but every little bit counts right? Maybe laughing can be my new ab work!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Must read
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LadiSteele More than 1 year ago
a laugh out read
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I have never read a book that made me laugh outloud so much!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Chelsea can always make you laugh.
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lttlelindsey More than 1 year ago
After listening to this book on audio I'm left with an over whelming feeling that if I ever saw Chelsea Handler in the flesh I'd push her down a flight of stairs. What a whiny horrible woman. Yelling incessantly about non problems is not cute. This books is obnoxious and not funny. What a waste of time and money.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Sighs where is the queen again?
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Chelsea is just as entertaining on paper as she is on television. If you don't like her, don't bother reading. I like her though & am a bigger fan after reading this book.