Co-parenting 101: Helping Your Kids Thrive in Two Households after Divorce

Co-parenting 101: Helping Your Kids Thrive in Two Households after Divorce

by Deesha Philyaw, Michael D. Thomas


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A successful co-parenting relationship is as vital to your child's well-being and health as nutritious food or proper exercise. Research, anecdotal evidence, and plain common sense all point to the fact that children are happier, healthier, and better adjusted when both of their parents play an active role in their lives. Studies also show that the trauma children experience in the wake of a divorce or separation can be lessened when they see their parents getting along. Kids whose parents successfully co-parent feel more secure than those who have limited or no connection to one of their parents post divorce.

Co-Parenting 101 is based on the premise that co-parenting is a must, not an option. The involvement of both parents—not just the primary guardian—is the cornerstone of successful co-parenting. This is the first book written by a formerly married couple for whom co parenting is central to their day to day lives, and it offers a comprehensive, personal, and upfront look at how to effectively raise kids with an ex-spouse.

Authors Deesha Philyaw and Michael D. Thomas, the creators of the popular co-parenting website,, share their own experiences raising their children together, as well as provide professional advice from co-parenting experts. Through practical tips combined with expert parental strategies, this book a great resource for divorced parents with children.

For parents, less time stressed out about legal wrangling means more time to be fully present and engaged with the children. By learning to put their animosity aside, parents can focus on putting their kids first.

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781608824632
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Publication date: 05/01/2013
Pages: 208
Sales rank: 449,712
Product dimensions: 5.90(w) x 8.90(h) x 0.60(d)

About the Author

Deesha Philyaw is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in Essence and Bitch magazines, as well as The Washington Post. Her writing has been anthologized in several collections including Literary Mama: Reading for the Maternally Inclined; When We Were Free to Be: Looking Back at a Children's Classic and the Difference It Made; and The Cassoulet Saved Our Marriage: True Tales of Food, Family, and How We Learn to Eat. She is the co-founder of

Michael D. Thomas works in the financial services industry and is the co-founder of

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments vii

Introduction: "You Should Write a Book" 1

Part I Divorce 101

1 Before You Call a Lawyer: Laying the Groundwork for Co-parenting Success 13

2 Good Grief: Strategies to Start the Healing Process 25

3 Attorneys and Mediators and Collaborative Divorce-Oh, My! 39

Part II Co-parenting Basics

4 What's Your Co-parenting Style? 53

5 Fifteen Things You May Want to Do (But Must Not Do) as a Co-parent 73

6 Fifteen Things You Must Do (But May Not Want to Do) as a Co-parent 93

7 Calendars, Clothes, and Camps 107

8 Write Your Own Parenting Plan 133

9 Separate but Equal 141

10 "What about Us?": Never-Married and Noncustodial Parents 147

Part III "But You Don't Know My Ex"

11 Co-parenting, Dating, and Remarriage 161

12 Fifteen Things You Can Do for Your Child in Spite of Your Uncooperative Ex 179

Postscript: What Co-parents Can Learn from Adult Children of Divorce 193

Resources 199

References 207


Deesha Philyaw and Michael D. Thomas live in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

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