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Compassionate Conversations: How to Speak and Listen from the Heart

Compassionate Conversations: How to Speak and Listen from the Heart

Compassionate Conversations: How to Speak and Listen from the Heart

Compassionate Conversations: How to Speak and Listen from the Heart



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The definitive guide to learning effective skills for engaging in open and honest conversations about divisive issues from three professional mediators.

When a conversation takes a turn into the sometimes uncomfortable and often contentious topics of race, religion, gender, sexuality, and politics, it can be difficult to know what to say or how to respond to someone you disagree with. Compassionate Conversations empowers us to transform these conversations into opportunities to bridge divides and mend relationships by providing the basic set of conflict resolution skills we need to be successful, including listening, reframing, and dealing with strong emotions. Addressing the long history of injury and pain for marginalized groups, the authors explore topics like social privilege, power dynamics, and, political correctness allowing us to be more mindful in our conversations. Each chapter contains practices and reflection questions to help readers feel more prepared to talk through polarizing issues, ultimately encouraging us to take risks, to understand and recognize our deep commonalities, to be willing to make mistakes, and to become more intimate with expressing our truths, as well as listening to those of others.

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780834842649
Publisher: Shambhala
Publication date: 05/19/2020
Sold by: Penguin Random House Publisher Services
Format: eBook
Pages: 240
File size: 983 KB

About the Author

DIANE MUSHO HAMILTON is an award-winning professional mediator, author, facilitator, and teacher of Zen and Integral Spirituality. She has been a practitioner of meditation for more than thirty years. Diane facilitates Big Mind Big Heart, a process developed to help elicit the insights of Zen in Western audiences. Diane is considered a pioneer in articulating the wisdom of an Integral Life Practice and has worked with Ken Wilber and the Integral Institute in Denver, Colorado, since 2004. She is also the cofounder of Two Arrows Zen, a center for Zen practice and study in Salt Lake City, Utah with her husband, Michael Mugaku Zimmerman. In 2012 she cofounded Integral Facilitator, her uniquely developmental approach to group facilitation mastery.

Table of Contents

Introduction ix

1 Conversations Evolve 1

2 What We Have in Common 10

3 An Exploration of Difference 19

4 Intimacy with Identity 28

5 What Is True: The Importance of "I," You," and "It" 39

6 Having a Clear Intention 49

7 Conversation Essentials 57

8 Hidden Biases 69

9 A History of Injury 80

10 Strong Emotions in Conversation 88

11 Clarifying Power 101

12 Talking about Social Privilege 111

13 Politically Correct 121

14 Growing through Conflict 131

15 Shadow in Conversation 141

16 Miraculously Resilient 150

17 To Atone and Forgive 160

18 Becoming Wholehearted 171

19 Freedom Here and Now 179

20 In It Together 187

Acknowledgments 197

Notes 198

Selected Bibliography 211

Index 214

About the Authors 224

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