Know That You Are Not Alone on This Journey
Adopting or fostering a child brings its own unique set of challenges only another parent facing the same uphill climb could possibly understand. From parenting children with traumatic pasts, to dealing with attachment issues, to raising a child with special needs, it can sometimes be a struggle just getting through the day. Mike Berry knows the loneliness and isolation you can easily feel in your particular parenting role—because he's been there. He's still there, and he wants to give you the hope and encouragement you so desperately need. There are plenty of how-to guides out there on parenting, but this one-of-a-kind book is specifically designed to address your needs as a parent of an adopted or foster child. With a refreshing dose of honesty, empathy, and care, you'll discover you are definitely not alone on your journey and God has a very special plan for you and your family.
|Publisher:||Harvest House Publishers|
|Product dimensions:||5.40(w) x 8.40(h) x 0.20(d)|
About the Author
Mike Berry is cocreator of the award-winning blog Confessions of an Adoptive Parent and the adoptive and foster support site Oasis Community. He's also a contributing writer for Disney's babble.com and TheGoodMenProject.com. Mike and his wife, Kristin, have cared for dozens of children through foster care and have adopted all eight of their children.
Table of Contents
Part 1 You Are Not Alone
1 Beginning with Hope 19
Identifying Your Expectations and Apprehensions
2 Jumping Off 39
The Joy and Struggle of Choosing This Journey
3 Learning to Swim 49
What to Do When You're In Over Your Head
4 Me Too 59
Finding Strength in Relationships
5 I Didn't Sign Up for This 75
Learning to Accept Your New Normal
6 The Middle of the Wreckage 85
Discovering Hope Where You Least Expect It
7 You Are Not Alone 97
The Healing Power of Shared Experience
Part 2 Finding Hope
8 The Story of Your Scars 109
9 The Voices in Our Heads 129
Overcoming Spiritual Attacks
10 Limping Together 141
Building an Effective Support System
11 Behind Every Cloud 157
Finding Light in Dark Times
12 Legends Versus Legacies 169
Your Influence Goes Deeper Than You Know
13 Remember Jeremiah 181
God Has a Plan for Your Child
14 A Girl Named Renee 193
The Transforming Power of Love and Compassion
15 Hope Has Arrived 207
God's Beautiful Story in You
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
Have you ever wondered what goes through the mind of an adoptive parent? Especially when a child is freaking out over what seems to be something small? Or how they make it through the day? Are you that adoptive parent wondering if anyone understands what you are going through? Mike answers those questions, and many more in this book. Mike and his wife, Kristin, have adopted all eight of their children. Some of them have come from traumatic backgrounds, with related challenges. Mike shares some of the deep, dark valleys, mental wreckage, and emotional minefields they have traveled through. The most powerful advice Mike offers is that you are not alone. Others are experiencing similar battles. Find hope in community. No matter how dark things look, there is hope.
I have followed the Berry’s blog for several years. When I heard there would be a book, I was thrilled. As an adoptive parent, there are few resources out there (especially written by other adoptive parents) that are specifically for us. Confessions of an Adoptive Parent is everything I thought it would be and more. It was as if I was having a cup of proverbial coffee and sharing life with a dear friend. In the midst of the struggles that come with adoption and foster care, this book was our very own form of “Me, too.” I laughed, I cried, I nodded my head, I journaled, and most of all, I was continuously reminded that I must not lose hope. Berry reminds us that hope can be found in the wreckage, in the beautiful, in the silence, in friendships, in “me, too”s, and in the past, present, and future. Hope must be held on to through it all. If you’re an adoptive or foster parent – RUN. Go get this book. Read it. Be reminded that you’re not alone. If you love an adoptive or foster parent – RUN. Get them this book. I’m telling you…we all need it.
Mike Berry’s book delivers all that the subtitle says and more! As a long-term special needs parent, I found it amazingly hopeful with many ideas for setting up a support system to get the help you need. My kids are in their twenties now, doing really well, so technically I am no longer in the trenches (I survived!) and I so wish I’d had this book 15-20 years ago! But having it now is good too – I am a behavior consultant and often work with foster and adoptive parents, and this book gave me a huge amount of insight into that realm. I know it will enhance the support I can give to the families I work with. This book is also very spiritual in approach, and it helped to renew my faith, a totally unexpected result, but very wonderful. I highly recommend this book for all special needs families – foster, adoptive, or bio. It will buoy you up, and yes, fill you with hope.
As an adoptive mom, I had a very hard time finding a book that properly described the feelings that I experienced as we went through the adoption process. Most of the options were clinical in nature, or provided a very surface level look at the day-to-day life of adoptive families. In Confessions of An Adoptive Parent, the author is very open and honest about his experiences with adoption and foster care, allowing readers to connect and feel supported throughout the book. While he shares the challenges, he provides a level of hope that can only be offered by someone who has walked in the same shoes. No other author that I have read has been able to so perfectly capture the experience, good and bad, while still offering encouragement. This book not only validated my feelings, but it provided tangible suggestions on how to find hope in the challenging days. I would highly recommend this book for anyone considering foster care or adoption, or for those who are have gone through the process and are working to stay afloat in the midst of the chaos. I would also encourage friends and family members of adoptive/foster families to read this to better understand their unspoken needs.
Beautifully raw. So thankful someone is talking about the hard of adoption yet highlighting that there is still hope.
THE BOOK ADOPTIVE FAMILIES HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR! A transparent book for the adoptive family offering encouragement and community. Mike (and Kristin) Berry give families what they have always needed—knowledgeable friends who meet them where they are and compassionately commiserate with them, while helping them regain their footing when family issues have knocked them sideways. Combining unflinching adoption scenarios and Biblical insight, this book is refreshingly right-on-point. Perfect for self or group study. You will want to purchase additional copies for your fostering and adoptive family friends, and your church library. All I keep thinking to myself is “thank you.”
Loved this book! It was a breath of fresh air as an adoptive parent to children with special needs. So thankful for Mike's honesty and message of hope that he reminds of us. During the hard days it is so good to know that you are not the only one in your situation. My husband and I will likely keep this book around to re-read various sections every year (who am I kidding, I might need to read it daily!). I appreciate that Mike was able to be real and honest with the struggles they have experienced and even if those reading it don't have the same exact struggle, we likely have the same feelings resulting from what is going on with our kids. Would strongly recommend this book to any new foster and pre-adoptive parents - not to scare them off, but to dive into this journey of loving kids from hard places with their eyes wide open - and with a reminder that we have a solution that is found in Jesus Christ and the community that He gives.