2020-05-11
A powerful account of sexual assault and decades of lingering trauma.
The opening of Harding’s memoir, told in brief episodes, finds her confronting Charles, who, when she was a young teenager, kidnapped and raped her—and, we learn, surely would have killed her had she not escaped. There he sat, imprisoned, nonchalantly, “as if he were waiting there just for me in the same way he’d been that afternoon, twenty-five years ago, when our paths happened to cross.” The author reconstructs the terrible events of the assault, unpremeditated only to the extent that she just happened to have been in the wrong place at the wrong time as Charles, recently released from juvenile detention, acted out his pent-up rage. Complicating the tale is a home life that might have seemed normal to a casual observer but that was not: Her unhinged, raging mother “beat my legs with a belt so bad I had to cover them up at school the next day” while her father did little to protect her from that constant wrath. Still, in the aftermath of that night in 1978, Harding forged a deep connection with him: “The crime had been important to my relationship with my father, forged an inseparable bond, and now it explained my unshakable loyalty to him,” she writes. All of these threads have unhappy resolutions even as Harding tries to get at the root of the debilitating anxiety that ensued years later. She decides that one key to restoring her health was to follow the tenets of “restorative justice,” one aspect of which is to face one’s attacker and hold a dialogue—in this case one that took place just before his release from prison, testing whether the transformation from violent youth to spiritual adult he said he underwent was genuine at all.
A thoughtfully told story that may inspire others to find healing in the wake of savage crime.
Bravely looks at her family trauma and the hope of restorative justice-combining wit, drama, and deep self-reflection to investigate the aftershocks of a devastating crime.” —Oxygen, “The Best True Crime Books Of 2020 For Holiday Gifting”
“This moving story of grit and resilience will resonate with readers long after the final page is turned.” —Publishers Weekly, Starred Review
“A gripping memoir, Dancing With the Octopus is both a heartbreaking reconstruction of a crime and a powerful account of healing from trauma.” —Electric Lit, Most Anticipated Debuts of the Second Half of 2020
“Harding's writing is exquisite, often funny… This book is personal, deeply and bravely thoughtful, and creatively expressed. . . . it can serve as a tool for the politically engaged.” —New York Journal of Books
“Darkly humorous . . . Harding draws a complex web of interlinked experiences to show how suffering can set up shop for good in a family and a town. Dancing With the Octopus joins a host of recent true crime memoirs dedicated to grounding crimes in a wider framework of social and familial contexts.” —CrimeReads “Most Anticipated Crime Books of 2020”
“Dancing with the Octopus is a brave and authentic picture of the tailwinds of trauma, the limits of human forgiveness and what it takes to maintain hope in a world bent on breaking us. Highly readable, and deeply moving.” —Rachel Louise Snyder, award-winning author of NO VISIBLE BRUISES
“An incredible book … Debora writes with a lightness of touch that belies the heavy lifting in a work of such magnitude and power.” —Philip Selway of Radiohead on Twitter
“This is a fantastic memoir . . . beautifully written and it's an excellent example of trauma's long hold on people. . . . An incredible look at depression and parenthood and forgiveness. . . . It is excellent.” —Bookriot's All the Books Podcast
“A gripping account of one woman's confrontation with the terror and heartbreak of her past. Harding combines true crime and family saga to illustrate the aftershocks of trauma, and the courage, tenderness, and humor that recovery requires.” —Melissa Febos, author of ABANDON ME
“Compelling… Harding is completely honest, whether describing her wariness, defiance, bewilderment, self-doubt, or the truths she eventually discovered about herself and her parents. Her unsparing and candid observations allow readers to really get to know this strong, determined survivor.” —Booklist
“Debora Harding writes with a stunningly original mixture of insight, wit, and humanity about a life packed with so much drama, loss and resilience that you can't believe its not an epic work of fiction.” —Kate Weinberg, author of THE TRUANTS
“In this compelling and unflinching memoir which switches between past and present, Harding... unravels the impact of this random act of violence and of her dysfunctional childhood. It's a tale of trauma and PTSD, but also of recovery through the healing power of restorative justice, and of enduring love.” —Bookseller, Editor's Choice
“A searing literary work that will help many of us see trauma in a different light. In strong and powerful prose Debora Harding shows us what it means to move forward through grief.” —Julia Samuel, author of THIS TOO SHALL PASS
“Gripping . . . you are drawn in straight away.” —BBC Radio 2
“Extraordinary, so powerful and like nothing I've read. Astonishing book. It deserves to be the most massive hit.” —Kate Mosse, author of LABRINYTH
“I have just finished reading Dancing with the Octopus... You are lucky! The electricity of this true crime memoir awaits you.” —Lemn Sissay, author of MY NAME IS WHY, on Twitter
“Debora Harding's book is a beautiful and exacting monument to resilience and recovery.” —The Telegraph
“It's as gripping as any thriller and as moving as any novel you're ever likely to read.” —Paul Chahidi, actor, on Twitter
“A powerful true story about a violent crime, a dysfunctional family, resilience, reckoning and recovery.” —BBC Women's Hour
“With remarkable narrative skill, Harding untangles the lingering effects of family dysfunction and criminal trauma. This is a page-turner with a deep heart and soul, full of forgiveness but demanding of accountability.” —BookPage, “Best Books of 2020: Memoirs”
