Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are—these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, giftedness, anxiety, sensory processing disorder, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But for the parents who love them, the challenges are just as hard—struggling to find the right school, the right therapist, the right parenting group while feeling isolated and harboring endless internal doubts about what’s normal, what’s not, and how to handle it all. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a bestselling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and the best kind of been-there, done-that companion. On the one hand it’s a book of saying NO, and how it’s time to say no to trying to fit your round-peg kid into society’s square holes, no to educational and social systems that don’t respect your child, no to the anxiety and fear that keep parents stuck. And then it’s a book of YES. By offering 18 paradigm shifts—what she calls “tilts”— Reber shows how to change everything. How to “Get Out of Isolation and Connect.” “Stop Fighting Who Your Child Is and Lean In.” “Let Go of What Others Think.” “Create a World Where Your Child Can Feel Secure.” “Find Your People (and Ditch the Rest).” “Help Your Kids Embrace Self-Discovery.” And through these alternative ways of being, discover how to stay open, pay attention, and become an exceptional parent to your exceptional child.
|Publisher:||Workman Publishing Company, Inc.|
|Product dimensions:||5.80(w) x 8.30(h) x 1.00(d)|
About the Author
Deborah Reber is a bestselling author, certified life coach, and speaker who has spent the past fifteen years writing inspiring books for women and teens. However, raising a twice-exceptional son and experiencing the heartaches, headaches, confusion, and unexpected gifts that is typical for parents raising these exceptional kids sparked a transformation in Debbie’s passion and led to a conscious shift from the realm of teen advocacy to the world of supporting the millions of parents who are raising unique kids. She launched TiLT Parenting - a website, podcast, and social media community - in April 2016, where she is building a community of supportive parents of neurodiverse children.
Table of Contents
A Differently Wired World v
Part 1 A Rallying Cry
Chapter 1 An Unmarked Path 3
Chapter 2 The New Normal 19
Chapter 3 Square Pegs in Round Holes 42
Chapter 4 What's Keeping Us Stuck 58
Chapter 5 It's Time for Something New 80
Part 2 How Everything Can Change
Tilt 1 Question Everything You Thought You Knew About Parenting 85
Tilt 2 Get Out of Isolation and Connect 94
Tilt 3 Let Go of What Others Think 104
Tilt 4 Stop Fighting Who Your Child Is and Lean In 114
Tilt 5 Parent from a Place of Possibility Instead of Fear 124
Tilt 6 Let Your Child Be on Their Own Time Line 134
Tilt 7 Become Fluent in Your Child's Language 145
Tilt 8 Create a World Where Your Child Can Be Secure 156
Tilt 9 Give (Loud and Unapologetic) Voice to Your Reality 165
Tilt 10 Practice Relentless Self-Care 174
Tilt 11 Let Go of Your Impossible Expectations for Who You "Should" Be as a Parent 184
Till 12 Make a Ruckus When You Need To 194
Tilt 13 Align with Your Partner 203
Tilt 14 Find Your People (and Ditch the Rest) 214
Tilt 15 Recognize How Your Energy Affects Your Child 225
Tilt 16 Show Up and Live in the Present 236
Tilt 17 Help Your Kids Embrace Self-Discovery 245
Tilt 18 If It Doesn't Exist, Create It 256
Epilogue: Join the Revolution 265
Selected Sources 268
Favorite Resources 269
Book Club Discussion Questions 272
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
FINALLY.... A BOOK THAT MAKES SENSE Almost all parenting books out there leave us parents with differently wired kids feeling hopeless, guilty, ashamed, judged, defeated.... Left asking ourselves questions such as 'what am I doing wrong?', 'why do other parents make it look so easy?', 'will it get easier?' Then we take our children out into society and can see how the world not only judges our child, but us as parents. Everyone out there has the solution to 'fix' our child's unique traits (aka socially unacceptable traits). If we would just medicate, go to therapy, spend more time at home, punish, use stickers and token boards, be consistent, stop making excuses, and the list is endless. Does any of this sound familiar? If it does, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There is an entire community out here who understands and this book (and the tilt parenting website) starts joining us in one movement to change the way society thinks of and interacts with our different wired children. An exceptionally written book that guides you to start a new parenting journey. One with acceptance and joy of embracing our atypical children, regardless of label or diagnosis. It is a must-read, uplifting and inspiring book that was long overdue to be written. PLEASE buy the book, read the book then pass it on to someone else who is parenting in the shadows. This book should be shared with educators, therapists, doctors and anyone else that interacts with differently wired children. Together, we can make a difference and change the world for our children.
If you have been blessed with a child that doesn’t seem to fit into what society calls ‘normal’, then you MUST read this book. Deborah Reber is on a mission to change the way others think about children she refers to as ‘differently wired’. She presents 18 practical strateiges, called ‘tilts’, to assist parents on the incredible (exhausting) journey raising these exceptional kids. As a society, we spend a lot of time, money and resources searching out a ‘label’ that will help our children with neuro-differences fit in. Typically the thought being once we know what the deficit is, we can then correct it. Deborah Reber writes this amazing book in an attempt to change that thought process, encouraging us to accept and embrace these ‘outside of the box’ children. And just because you may not be the parent of a differently wired child, you certainly know at least one. This book is guaranteed to change the way you think about and interact with differently wired children and their families. Thank you Deborah Reber for such an incredible book!
This book was a comforting read for a single mother of a child with autism. Not only was the information plentiful, but it read like advice from a good friend as opposed to a book full of psychological mumbo-jumbo.
I have read so many books about Autism and ADHD that I could throw up medical jargon for a year. I find them all to be the same, depressing and full of selfish parents. This book was a refreshing take on the world of parents of "Differently Wired" kids. There was hope among the chaos. I felt like I could connect to this mother and I knew all the struggles she was going through, because I had been there too. I don't think the mother asked once, "Why was this happening to me..." but gave the reader a sense that there is an end to all the tough times, you just have to support your child and learn what they need. I loved this book and would recommend it to any parent of a newly diagnosed differently wired child, or even to those who have been down that path, but need to know that they are not alone. Received an advance reader copy in exchange for a fair review.