Life happens, and change is part of life. Learn to transition from fear of change to understanding how to maintain harmony and balance in the midst of change. Double Stixs ™ is a program designed to restore balance in our lives.Balance restores and expands our personal strength. These two qualities lessen the impact we experience with change. “Living Life to the Fullest” or “Living the Dream” results from two things: Change and Self. After all the inner and outer struggles, it is ourselves that have the power over all things that impact our lives, our thoughts, our experiences, our results! “I have immense regard and love for Cindy Lake. She is one of those rare selfless individuals that truly wants to help others in every way that she can. I’ve personally trained her as a Soul Coach and anyone she works with will benefit from her grace and support.” —Denise Linn, best-selling author of 17 books, an international lecturer and a popular radio talk-show host. She is the founder of the International Institute of Soul Coaching®
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Read an Excerpt
The Nourishment and Gift of Change
By Cindy Terwilliger Lake
Balboa PressCopyright © 2013 Cindy Terwilliger Lake
All rights reserved.
Double Stixs: A Childhood Creation
What is in a name, especially a name of a program on change called Double Stixs?
An excellent question, to completely answer, there are three parts to the evolution of Double Stixs:
I. The source—a beginning of all things in life; a story that lays foundation
II. The evolution—the pieces and synchronicities
III. The emerging—like a phoenix rising out of the ashes, the last puzzle piece put into place; there lies the clarity to see all things and to seize from within all that harmony and beauty define.
Let's begin, shall we, at the source, the beginning of what is now known as Double Stixs. The source simply originated as a child playing in the woods in a small town in western Pennsylvania. Believe it or not, there was a time during summer vacations or weekends when, after breakfast and chores, being outside the house was mandatory. It was not an option. These times involved riding bikes, playing catch, hiking, and playing in the woods until a voice was heard calling, "Time for lunch" or "Time for dinner!" These times were full of exploration, sibling taunting, and friends hanging out, making the most of what was available to each of us to fill the time. Looking back, this was a time when creativity and imagination could be expressed freely, a time of childhood innocence.
Behind our home was a path that led down into the woods, and it was surrounded by trees, shrubs, big boulders, little boulders, and fallen tree trunks, all leading down to the bottom where a creek flowed. Sitting on the fallen tree trunks, our imaginations kicked into gear each time we ventured into the woods. There was a special spot with nooks and crannies in this very large oak tree trunk lying over an embankment. We could walk the trunk like a tight rope down and over to the other side.
This area was called base camp, as all exploration started from this place. There were paths formed in all directions from playing so much in that area. Sometimes, wet leaves were on the paths, causing slippery slopes, but that was all part of the fun and excitement of going to base camp. Each time I visited, the experience was totally different. Each trip, there was a different imaginative situation from base camp—one day a fort, another day a campsite, another day stranded on a planet. There were many adventures in that base camp.
There was also a brilliant idea to throw a rope over one of the trees. We would swing back and forth, trying to get higher than the next person, even swinging and then letting go, falling into a pile of leaves we had collected to see who could fall exactly in the middle of the pile. Brilliant, at least to each of us. Never once did we ever feel afraid or process all the scenarios that could be possible if there was a miscalculation.
This was a time in our lives where we were fearless, not thinking about anything but the challenge or task at hand and going for it. We didn't even think we were fearless. We just knew we were a few kids out having a great time, using our imaginations and time to feel alive and keep busy.
What were we thinking? We weren't thinking! We were using our imaginations to create fun, excitement, and adventure while spending time in the moments we had until being called to return home. There was no thinking of all the stumps, rocks, or sharp objects protruding or the broken glass that could harm us farther down the path. No thought as to how the broken glass got there or if there was someone around lurking behind the trees. These objects and obstacles were just part of the adventure.
This area in the woods became my playground as well as my refuge. There was no season that the woods weren't part of my life. Even in the winter, I remember sitting on the rocks, looking at the snow bending the branches. The beauty of the landscape and the stillness of the woods always brought comfort, a sense of safety, and yes, harmony and balance!
Looking back, what fun those times were, especially since this is where the source for Double Stixs came to be—though I didn't realize it. I was just a kid out playing, exploring, and making memories with my brother and neighbors. During the summers, my grandparents would take me on nature walks, introducing me to all the names of the leaves, flowers, and trees. So exploring nature and spending time in the woods was normal for me. We just didn't stay in the house or in our rooms. Outdoors was the place to kick in the imagination and to create our own fun and games.
The sticks lying around the base camp and throughout the woods were used as canes or walking sticks to pull me up a higher grade area. Yes, I always needed two. One stick just seemed to do nothing, but with two, I was able to gain strength to pull myself up the hill. I didn't give any thought to picking up the sticks. It seemed like the easiest way to help support myself getting up the hill instead of crawling on hands and knees. So the sticks balanced me out, and when planted, they allowed for an easier climb up the embankments.
Years later, I found that when snow skiing, placing the poles into the snow to traverse from side to side kept my balance and gave me better control to pull myself up from a fall. Pole placement is so important in skiing and I felt very comfortable with this given my years of experience in the woods using the sticks to balance and pull me up the hill.
So the source of Double Stixs originated from a child's imagination for creating fun and adventure.
A gentle reminder that some of the best accomplishments, ideas, inspiration, passions and dreams can originate from our childhood imagination, being fearless, and just doing it!
Evolution of Double Stixs
Childhood evolves, and those fun-filled summer days fade away as each of us races toward the upcoming milestones of our lives. Our high school graduation — freedom! The illusion age of all things — 21 — the ability to make all things possible, be taken seriously and the most important, we could go out with our friends and legally order a beverage of choice! College graduation and we're off on a new path to start our new lives with a career and making money to attain all we felt was lacking in our lives. Love, the adventure of finding that special someone to share each waking moment, that special person that is "the one" and where plans begin to unite in a lifetime of love, sharing and experiencing all that life has to offer us.
The pretty picture that is framed in our minds as we exit childhood and begin down the path of life, this picture may have variations of time, places and people but it's still a snapshot of what will fuel our drive to excel.
My framed pictures were embedded in my mind; oh the frames were so beautiful, but the images were even more beautiful. The interesting thing is I always had two frames; one that represented my personal side and the other for my professional achievements and career. Looking back I find it interesting there was a division, a distinct picture of personal and professional, representing two!
Since as far back as I remember, my gravitation has always been to even numbers and also, as in the woods all those years ago, I always had to have two sticks. If I were to have three or five of something, it just didn't feel right, didn't sit well at all with me. I'd either have to take away or add, ensuring there was an even number. My explanation all these years was feeling centered and balanced with equal numbers; the odd items or numbers felt wobbly, out of sync with my feelings, emotions or my ability to attain successful results.
When I was growing up, my friend's parents would always make New Year's resolutions. I never asked my parents this question: Mom and Dad, why don't you make resolutions? I've often wondered what their answer and belief was on this yearly tradition; I'm sure the answer would have been profound and inspiring.
Right after New Year's, I'd notice a list of things posted on the refrigerator, bathroom mirror, or on the kitchen counters, that needed some type of action, a resolution. Some of the lists would be long with notations off to the side, and some lists had only a few items. These lists varied with resolutions from losing weight, to saving for some big purchase for later in the year, or a special vacation. Significant lists that seemed so important at the time, however, within several weeks, faded into the past, often to be found in a waste can or forever out of sight. I remember asking once what happened to the list. With no sense of defeat, the response was, 'I broke it, so I gave up.' This yearly ritual resulted in my desire never to make New Year's resolutions. Why? What's the point, if in a few weeks their importance was nothing more than the ink used to write the message down on paper?
Though New Year's resolutions are not for me, setting goals and focusing on what I want to do with my life or accomplish has always been very important. Yes, it is important to give what drives us life by writing and bringing into reality the focus of our intentions. The key here is the intent with which these items are written. So my realization that New Year's resolutions were the first step of the year in setting up for disappointment, frustration and perceived failure made me determined not to do this yearly ritual.
Let's fast forward from my young teen observations to adulthood, working in Corporate America. My career position required determining the how, where and when of department goals, objectives, and profit projections set forth in the annual prospectus. I began to list all the activities that required direct action by me and then sub-actions that were necessary to achieve all the actions required from me. Given that the New Year budget and objectives were finalized late fourth quarter, this gave me time to make my action list during the holidays.
Remember, I don't do resolutions, so I certainly couldn't post my yearly career activities list and my personal goal list on January 1, it would feel too much like a resolution. So I did the next best thing, I began creating my lists to have them finalized and strategically put in place on January 11.
At the time, my rationale was that the 11th still had a one in the number and it was the first month of the New Year. So January 11 became pivotal in setting the tone for the upcoming year and continues to this day.
Double Stixs — II, the 11th and the propensity toward bringing new changes for the upcoming year, stability and balance, either in an activity or in emotions. Pythagoras, the Greek philosopher and mathematician, is generally accepted as the founder of numerology. Numerology incorporates the Pythagorean belief that "all things can be expressed in numerical terms because all things are ultimately reducible to numbers."
Pythagoras assigned numbers to each letter of the alphabet. Double Stixs, has eleven (11) letters, in numerology the numbers associated with the letters totals 42, reducing to a single number (4+2) the number is 6, with the meaning of Harmony. For me, when externally driven change shows up in my life, I want to return to Harmony as quickly as possible. Change has six (6) letters in the word, and in numerology, the numbers associated with the letters in change total 29, reducing to one number (2+9): 11. The switching and interconnections of the two words stood out and brought goose bumps all up and down my body.
The Pure Interconnection of Significance of these two words unrelated in the same context until I began writing this book brought immediate goose bumps to the surface. Hopefully this is a wow moment for you, too. Here is a review of the words Doubles Stixs and Change:
Double Stixs: 11 letters; numerology totals 42 (4+2) = 6
Change: 6 letters; numerology totals 29 (2+9) = 11
11 meaning of Wisdom, Light, Balance
6 meaning of Peace and Harmony
Numerology and The Divine Triangle by Faith Javane and Dusty Bunker is a book that provides a comprehensive understanding on the subject of numerology.
The numerology, meaning, and associations of the name Doublestixs, the date, the symbolism and events significant to the number eleven would not reveal itself until almost thirty years later. Selecting the topic for this book was easy, Change. Little did I realize the significance of this topic for my first book, and all the interconnections of Double Stixs, the topic of change, and who I am. I call these years my learning period on the synchronicities of life.
Life is full of synchronicities, it is within us to notice and recognize when a synchronicity has been experienced and to sit still for a moment to review the impact of the situation or encounter.
What is synchronicity? Carl Jung stated, "When coincidences pile up in this way, one cannot help being impressed by them—for the greater the number of terms in such a series, or the more unusual its character, the more improbable it becomes." Some may call a series of relating symbolism a coincidence, but as you will read later in the book, there's much more related to the numbers, as well as their definitions relating to change, beauty, harmony and strength.
For further reading on synchronicity, there are some books listed in the reference and resource section of this book.
A symbolism technique that is personal to me began as a teenager and continues to this day. It's represented by dancing!
Dancing is such a great way to not only have fun, but to meet and greet old friends while meeting new friends. Think back to the last time you were on the dance floor having a great time. Do you have one special thing you do with your shoulders, head, hips or fingers while dancing? I always did the same thing with my hands and fingers since high school, but didn't realize it was that noticeable until it was brought to my attention. I do this funny thing with my hands, having my index fingers pointing and moving to the beat of the music. When I was asked what my finger movements were all about, before even thinking, I called my dancing fingers, Double Stixs!
For years, when my husband and I were getting ready to dance, he would ask, "Are Double Stixs coming out tonight?" Laughing, I answered, "But of course, Double Stixs are part of me, right?"
Every time my husband leads me to the dance floor, within a few dance steps, out come my index fingers dancing to the beat of the music. Little did I realize the two index fingers named Double Stixs would become part of a bigger arrangement of beautiful music that would expand my heart, soul, and life.
Synchronicities would continue as the years passed to further solidify the significance of Double Stixs and the difference that being connected in all aspects of life creates harmony and balance.
Double Stixs Evolution: Nourishment Symbolism
Growing up in a small, rural area in western Pennsylvania, dining in a restaurant consisted of a burger fast food eatery, and not a major brand, I might add. The dining options just weren't there as a child. Come on, I spent many of my formative years living on a road called "Fishpot" — this should give you some imagery as to the remoteness of the area. My first introduction to anything from a different culture, in this instance, Asian cuisine, was in Chinatown in Washington, DC in my twenties. My first introduction to chopsticks was not a fulfilling dining experience. I did attempt to listen to the instructions on the positioning of fingers and the "how to" part of using chopsticks.
Somewhere between the "how to" instructions and actually attempting the exercise, everything was lost in translation. Some of you may be asking why there's a reference to chopsticks in a book of change. Let's explore my experience and symbolism; hopefully this will help to clarify. The technique of using chopsticks is to identify the piece of food that you would like to select to put into your mouth to eat. We use chopsticks for nourishing our bodies, so the symbolism of Double Stixs and chopsticks is using our life experiences — all our previous experiences and changes — to nourish us and fill us with strength to move through change more quickly.
My first attempt, and many attempts afterwards, resulted in frustration, with a continuing hunger pang deep from within me. Finally, I requested a fork and laid down my two sticks, as fulfilling my desire to eliminate my hunger was stronger than attempting to learn how to nourish myself with a new set of wooden sticks. So there lay a set of beautiful chopsticks with gold markings, just waiting to execute their purpose. I wouldn't be the connection for the sticks that day.
This day wasn't to be the day to master the use of chopsticks, rather it was just the continuation of my association with two wooden sticks that would come to represent nourishment for the soul, creating harmony, balance and strength.
My sense of disappointment was replaced with a newfound affection for Asian cuisine. Though my first introduction to chopsticks wasn't a success, I didn't give up! Armed with a spare pair of sticks, I practiced at home until I was able to successfully pick up food and place it in my mouth. Success! I had managed to actually eat the food instead of dropping the entire entree either on my lap or tablecloth. Sometimes it's the smallest of achievements, the simplest of things that allow us to experience and see the bigger picture of life.
Mastering the art of using chopsticks has served me well over the years, as has the symbolisms and synchronicities of Double Stixs. All the pieces of the puzzle that were once just scattered, are now strategically placed for my evolution of change to emerge. All I need to do is press them into position as my journey to embrace and be empowered by change evolves.
Double Stixs Evolution: Silence
Life couldn't be running any smoother at this point in time. The career, the finances, the family and social life, are all in sync to the point that boredom may begin to set in at certain moments. Life seems so effortless and routine, and there always seems to be more than enough abundance. One day a phone call or event suddenly sets your life in pause. Then, when life returns to normal, the life you led before is no more. Oh, the lifestyle is still there, but there are underlying changes occurring and external factors that begin to appear. These changes may be obvious or they may be shifting inside without conscious knowledge, just a sense of something stirring. Something has or is changing.
Excerpted from Double Stixs by Cindy Terwilliger Lake. Copyright © 2013 Cindy Terwilliger Lake. Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Introduction: Reflection, Gratitude, and Taking Action!.................... xix
Chapter 1 Double Stixs: A Childhood Creation.................... 1
Chapter 2 Double Stixs: The Circle of Connections.................... 19
Chapter 3 Double Stixs: Change and Self.................... 25
Chapter 4 Double Stixs: The Heart Opens to Allow.................... 33
Chapter 5 Double Stixs: The Two of Change.................... 39
Chapter 6 C: Confidence.................... 45
Chapter 7 H: HEALING.................... 61
Chapter 8 A: Alignment.................... 89
Chapter 10 G: Gratitude.................... 119
Chapter 11 E: Emerging.................... 129
Pythagorean Chart.................... 144
Inspirational Quotes.................... 146
About the Author.................... 149