The millionaire of the title is Joan Rivers, an over-aged Beverly Hills brat whom many of the film's characters want to see dead or in rags. Armed with only her mile-a-minute mouth, Rivers fends off con men, fortune hunters, and would-be murderers--among them, possibly, her own husband (Alex Rocco). Thank heaven for her faithful household staff, headed by manic chef Mesach Taylor. The villains include Morgan Fairchild and David Ogden Stiers, for whom the audience may be rooting after fifteen minutes or so. How to Murder a Millionaire was made for TV--but not for my TV.