Grand Theft Planetary & Other Stories

Grand Theft Planetary & Other Stories

by HL Jones

NOOK Book(eBook)


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Grand Theft Planetary is a collection of fifteen short stories released as a precursor to the forthcoming H L Jones novel, "Ragnar Blaise’s High Idea".

Grand Theft Planetary – A bored celebrity decides to steal an entire planet.

My Life is Saved – If at first you don't succeed... A man who can turn back time persuades a desperate beauty to go to bed with him.

From Afar – The first man on Mars is forced to find another home while pursued by a horrific creature.

Technology Fails Me – An IT Technician working for a tyrannical corporation helps a computer to live.

Modern Glass – A shallow businessman visits his daughter between social appointments.

Man Alone – Wandering across an apocalyptic England, one man struggles to survive against UFOs, strange mutated beasts, and a one hundred foot tall metal giant.

Barriers – World War 3 erupts due to a desirable alien artifact.
Murve’s Dog – A penniless heart-broken man adopts an equally-pitiful dog.

Bud and Rufus Play Dare – Two housemates play a destructive game of poker where the loser is forced to do a dare.

I Rule – The newly-elected President is given some shocking news about the human race - and the part he needs to play.

A Theoretical Question – Two students misappropriate the university’s newest asset to answer an age-old question; how many babies can a man take on in a fight?

Time and Punishment – A shy intellectual starts work at Time and Punishment, a time-travelling prison facility where the world’s most notorious mass-murderer is plotting his escape – and the ultimate act of homicide.

Farming – The rulers of the world contemplate culling the world in order to save it from an outside entity.

A Visual Masterpiece – A university scholar becomes obsessed with a woman who offers him a taste of the world’s pleasures.

Ticket – On the anniversary of his friend’s departure, a shambling recluse remembers the events of that fateful day.

Product Details

BN ID: 2940045316323
Publisher: HL Jones
Publication date: 09/30/2013
Sold by: Smashwords
Format: NOOK Book
Sales rank: 931,978
File size: 222 KB
Age Range: 18 Years

About the Author

HL Jones was born and raised in Bristol UK. In fact he still lives within a stone's throw of his childhood home because the rest of the world is too serious and scary. Plus there's a fortune in Star Wars and Transformers toys buried in the back garden still.

As punishment for squandering his teenage years on drinking white cider and hanging about in multistorey car parks, the government decided to tear down his old schools and build shiny new academies instead. This upset him so much that he decided to boycott driving until the age of 26, then got a job driving the length of the country fixing what his father lovingly called "haunted fishtanks". It was during these frequent trips away from home that he started to write fiction, usually when sat in hotel bars getting rat-assed on whatever homebrew the northerners decided to put on the cheap tap. He impressed the denizens of Bradford with his cider-hardened liver so much that they invited him to live with them for a few years. It was during this time that he got some really serious drinking/writing under his belt, and surprised himself by winning a few short-story competitions. Convinced that he was actually a chimp that could type, Bradford petitioned to have him removed from West Yorkshire.

On his return to God's Country he was hailed a hero, and given the key to the city ("the key" being "a car ride" and "the city" being "Wetherspoons"). He spends his free time watching the Chicago Bears through his fingers, playing Magic: The Gathering (mono Blue all day), and hoping that Disney makes an X-Wing game in VR soon.

On a serious note I am publishing as much material as I can in 2020 for free. This year is beyond hardship; Australia was on fire, the plague has returned, the US Navy have confirmed the existence of alien spacecraft, the global economy is cracking, and America is spiralling into another civil war. If I can cheer up a couple of people with my work then I'll be happy.

Take care of yourself, look after your loved ones, and help others if you can. We are all human after all.

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