“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
God knows our weakness and so He wants to be our strength. He loves us and wants to show His love by protecting and guiding us.
I knew all about God as a little girl attending church regularly. I felt secure then with the knowledge that God loves and wants me. Going to church felt good to me. Then things changed and with it my feelings of love and safety vanished.
Attempting to run from my childhood, only to encounter neglect and abandonment in my marriage, while living in a place of suffering and wanting to die. In my mind, death seemed more desirable than life. Anger consumed my very soul. Raising my children and was not able to explain to them why they could not have the things their friends had or a father in the home, burned deep within me.
I suffered two breakdowns and was hospitalized for both. Doctors diagnosed me as being bipolar, severely depressed, and having split personality. I cursed everything and everyone daily. I thought how weak and worthless I was.
In my brokenness, I became more broken and lost myself in another man, whom I let define me as a woman and as a mother to my kids. I woke up and had no idea where the woman in me went; hitting rock-bottom, having flashbacks, while remembering feelings of being loved and secure. My breakthrough came when I returned to God. God transformed me into the virtuous woman I am today.
God showed me His strength. With God I can do all things including raise four boys, obtain three degrees, and write this book. He showed me that I did not need to search for something I had all along – LOVE.
