Home Improvement: Undead Edition

Home Improvement: Undead Edition


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Home Improvement: Undead Edition by Charlaine Harris

The editors of the New York Times bestselling Death's Excellent Vacation bring home a new collection...with a never-before- published Sookie Stackhouse story!

There's nothing like home renovation for finding skeletons in the closet or otherwordly portals in the attic. Now, for any homeowner who's ever wondered, "What's that creaking sound?" or fans of "how to" television who'd like a little unreality mixed in with their reality shows, editors Charlaine Harris and Toni L. P. Kelner return with an all-new collection of the paranormal perils of Do-It-Yourself.

Sookie Stackhouse resides in these pages, in a never-before-published story by #1 New York Times bestselling author Charlaine Harris. And New York Times bestselling authors Patricia Briggs, James Grady, Heather Graham, Melissa Marr, and nine other outstanding writers have constructed more frightening and funny fixer-upper tales guaranteed to shake foundations and rattle readers' pipes.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780441020355
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date: 08/02/2011
Pages: 352
Product dimensions: 6.20(w) x 9.10(h) x 1.20(d)
Age Range: 18 Years

About the Author

Charlaine Harris writes the #1 New York Times bestselling paranormal fantasy series featuring Sookie Stackhouse (the basis for the HBO(r) series True Blood) and the New York Times bestselling mystery series featuring sleuth Harper Connelly. She lives in a small town in southern Arkansas.

Toni L. P. Kelner is the award-winning author of the "Where Are They Now?" mystery series. She lives in Boston, Massachusetts.


Southern Arkansas

Date of Birth:

November 25, 1951

Place of Birth:

Tunica, Mississippi


B.A. in English and Communication Arts, Rhodes, 1973

Table of Contents

Introduction Charlaine Harris Toni L. P. Kelner ix

If I Had A Hammer Charlaine Harris 1

Wizard Home Security Victor Gischler 27

Gray Patricia Briggs 45

Squatters' Rights Rochelle Krich 71

Blood on the Wall Heather Graham 101

The Mansion of Imperatives James Grady 125

The Strength Inside Melissa Marr 141

Woolsley's Kitchen Nightmare E. E. Knight 163

Through This House Seanan McGuire 185

The Path S. J. Rozan 211

Rick the Brave Stacia Kane 237

Full-Scale Demolition Suzanne McLeod 263

It's All in the Rendering Simon R. Green 289

In Brightest Day Toni L. P. Kelner 309

About the Authors 337

What People are Saying About This

From the Publisher

Praise for Home Improvement: Undead Edition:

“The authors do a fine job of exploring the danger of the DIY movement. The tone ranges from silly (“It's All in the Rendering”) to classic horror (“The Mansion of Imperatives”)…there is no lack of imagination in this collection…This is definitely one of the most fun books you will read this summer.”—San Francisco Book Review

“These are delightful, entertaining and chilling stories. Some of them you'll be carrying around in your head for days. Do yourself a favor and spend a rainy afternoon with this book.”—Fresh Fiction

“Fun, different and often surprising compilation of short stories…This collection is a treat; the stories are strong and most reward the reader with a pleasing plot twist. The paranormal element added to the mundane yet trying experience of home or business renovation was an inspired theme certain to strike a cord with anyone who has lived the experience. Just the thing to enjoy on a languid summer day with a tall glass of cold lemonade.”—Monsters and Critics

Customer Reviews

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Home Improvement: Undead Edition 3.5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 40 reviews.
faery-recluse More than 1 year ago
Very enjoyable reading since I didn't want to commit to a long book at the time. I was able to enjoy reading a story on my bus ride to work. As a big Sookie Stackhouse fan, the stories in this home improvement theme based book did not fall short.
Karen Burke More than 1 year ago
I love the antholigies that Charlaine Harris puts together. It's nice to be introduced to new writers and characters.
harstan More than 1 year ago
This fourteen urban fantasy anthology are tongue in cheek tales that humorously lampoons the sub-genre and self help guides. All the entries are lighthearted fun as the readers leans the true meaning of bump in the night. The editors book end the collection as Charlaine Harris opens with Sookie greeted by a newcomer when a wall comes down in "If I Had a Hammer"; while Toni L.P. Kelner finishes the book with "In Brightest Day" in which raising the dead Gorrfried proves difficult as he keeps getting dead. Elyna "Gray " (Patricia Brigg's learns you can't go home to renovate in Chicago. Broahm calls "Wizard Home Security" (by Victor Gichler) when someone broke into his home. In New Orleans, Defeo goes home to find pig's "Blood on the Walls" of the family tombs by Heather Graham. The European knows he needs to change his GPS now that he is in the American Midwest's Switzerland Wisconsin learning first hand about "Woolsey's Kitchen Nightmare" by E. E. Knight. All the entries are enjoyable humorous Home Improvement tales that Tim Taylor would appreciate the paranormal power tools.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
After delighting in the first few stories, had to force way through to the end, all the while hoping selections would be as excellent as the first ones. Didn't happen.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Gave me a chance to read some of my favorites and pick up some new ones.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Maddy_Keller More than 1 year ago
If I had a Hammer by Charlaine Harris Sookie and friends unearth an angry ghost while remodeling Tara’s house. This story was a bit boring, and the ending was anti-climatic. Wizard Home Security by Victor Gischler A wizard gets robbed and so puts in a home security system. But there are downsides to bobby-trapping your own house. I loved this story. One of my favorites in this collection. Gray by Patricia Briggs A lonely vampire returns to her old house, determine to fix it up as nice as it had been in the day. But things seem to conspire against her, including a vengeful ghost and the master of the city. This story was enjoyable. I especially liked the romantic twist at the end. Squatter’s Rights by Rochelle Krich A young Jewish couple are haunted by scratching in the walls at night. This story was very formulaic. I was disappointed in the ending especially. Blood on the Wall by Heather Graham A serial killer is stalking and killing the local satan worshipers. Can a beat cop and a reformed satanist stop the violence? This story was fun with a cool twist at the end. Begs for a sequel story. The Mansion of Imperatives by James Grady A group of friends attempt to renovate a home in the middle of a blizzard. But the home seems to have other plans. Short sentence fragments, head hopping, and messy writing make this almost impossible to read. It settles down near the end, and the twist was interesting, but overall I could not enjoy it. The Strength Inside by Melissa Marr A pair of Bori sisters attempt to make a home for their younger siblings, but a stubborn HOA representative fights their home improvement project. Anyone who has problems with their home owner’s association would appreciate this one. This is by far my favorite story of this collection. The twist at the end had me rolling on the floor. Woolsey’s Kitchen Nightmare by E.E. Knight A restaurant consultant tries to help a restaurant catering to translife (the undead and monsters) become profitable. A bit slow to get going, I enjoyed this one. The setting is unique and the story is very original. An impressive array of monsters populate this story, including zombies, skeletons, vampires, Devi demons, and night riders. Through this House by Seanan McGuire A old neglected mansion is a hard enough home improvement project, but place that magic in Fearie and populate it with Pixies and Boogies, and your project becomes infinitely harder. I liked this story, although I haven’t read any of the rest of the series. Very original, with lots of action and a cast of unique characters. The Path by S.J. Rozan The ghost of an old monk must go against his inner nature in order to be reborn. I really tried with this one, but I could not finish it. Rick the Brave by Stacia Kane An unemployed electrician takes a cash job in a seedy part of town helping to fix up an old mansion, but a pack of ghosts has other plans. Very fun, I enjoyed Rick’s adventures in home improvement. Not much of a twist, but I enjoyed the ride. Full-Scale Demolition by Suzanne McLeod When a home renovation opens up a pixie portal in a clients mansion, Genny Taylor a sidhe fae, is called in to catch the pixies and close the portal. But things do not go as planned. This story seemed to have a lot of background, I think its part of a series. I’d be interested in looking up more after reading this piece. Highly recommend this story. It’s all in the Rendering by Simon R. Green A house at the border of worlds poses unique challenges in the realm of home improvements. A change on one side needs to balanced by an equal change on the other. Another disappointing story. I liked the ‘twinning’ aspect of this story, of seeing the two different sides of everything, but overall it was boring. In Brightest Day by Toni L.P. Kelner A houngan raises a corpse so he can finish a home renovation. But someone else doesn’t want this project completed and keeps killing the undead. I really enjoyed this one. Very original and funny. The twist was hilarious. Overall I give this collection 3 stars. A few duds really pull down the quality of the entire collection, and nothing here is amazing enough to make up for it.
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Squatters Rights ended in the middle of the story....not happy about that!
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natureglory More than 1 year ago
This book was not what I was expecting but the stories are great. I definitely recommend this book.
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cjstone427 More than 1 year ago
Good companion.....
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